Lucky Enough to Live
by flying feather scribbles
Summary: [Sequel to Explosive Energy] Emmaline has started her life over. Then she runs across a sudden fight between Superheroes and Super-Villains near Central Park and finds Danny injured. She takes him back to her apartment to find he is dying and there's nothing she can do, and his friends don't even know. Just a great new start of her final days to life.
1. Fresh Air

**Hi hi hi! This is my sequel to "Explosive Energy". For those of you who haven't read it, if you would like to, it is in the X-Men: Evolution category. ;-) I'd greatly appreciate reviews, you know, just because it's always nice to get other people's opinions, and know that people are actually READING the story. :-) Anonymous reviews are great too! If anybody has any advice, ideas, criticism, complaints, or maybe even praise, then you can either PM me or put it in a review- I'd appreciate any of the above, especially constructive criticism and ideas for the story! Now, to begin. (I don't want to bore you with my talk.)**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything except my OC (Emmaline Carlson), the idea, and any poetry. :-)**

**Chapter 1: Fresh Air**

_**We should all start to live before we get too old.**_

_**-Marilyn Monroe**_

I take a deep breath in, and allow the wind's song to sweep me away to another land. The beautiful silence makes my chest swell, then I slowly let the breath out. Everything is so peaceful, and I am overwhelmed by the joy of existence.

Slowly, I open my eyes and stand, feeling refreshed and full of energy. My hands are buzzing, so I gently shake them. The soft green grass is comforting to my bare feet, and the gentle breeze caresses my hair. Humming to myself, I begin the walk back to my apartment. I may only be seventeen, but the man who I rent the apartment from doesn't seem to care, much. The walk back from Central Park is only twenty minutes, and I love the light exercise. It's a Sunday, so I don't have to work today- not that I spend a particularly large chunk of my time at work, though I do enjoy my job. If it can be called that. The rest of my time is open for whatever I want to do, and in New York City, it is easy to keep myself busy.

I usually take my time to enjoy the sights, but for some reason, I feel the urge to hurry tonight. Perhaps it's that the sky has turned a nasty shade of green, or that the wind has picked up, but either way, I'm nervous and jumpy. When I get back to the apartment building, I dash up the stairs and slam the door behind me, locking it.

I have a television, but I don't use it much. I need to distract myself now, though, and I have a feeling that reading or listening to music won't cut it this evening. Collapsing into my squashy armchair, I glance around the small room that I happily call home.

It's dingy, but I don't mind. I repainted the walls a pale, cheerful yellow. I couldn't think of anything to do about the stained linoleum floors though, so I just covered it in various rugs from the Flea Market, Craig's List, Ebay, the thrift store, and those kind of places. My "kitchen" is quite nice, I think, considering how much I pay for rent: there's a counter surrounding the cooking area, an oven, stove, fridge, freezer, microwave, and plenty of cupboard space for one person. There's a large window, and nearby I have an old-fashioned tube TV hanging on the wall, and a cushy secondhand armchair with a side table and reading lamp. I can't afford to buy many books, but the ones I do have sit upon a wooden bookshelf along with various other precious trinkets of mine. The bookshelf also holds a few library books that I've borrowed, and a cheap CD player/radio. On the other side of the room is my small bed, covered with tons of pillows and blankets. The walls are covered with hand-drawn pictures and quotes. Nearly everything is secondhand and used, but I don't mind.

I turn the TV on to the news station, staring in horror at the scene. There's some dark creature in a black cape fighting Spider-Man. I sigh, tears welling up in my eyes. I know his story, just like everybody else's. I know he is Peter Parker. I know what happened to his uncle. I'm Emmaline Carlson, so of course I know- I'm cursed. The memories are mostly faint, but I can still remember what happened even if the images don't haunt my everyday existence or dreams. It's easier to immerse myself in martial arts, reading, meditation, volunteering, that sort of thing. I still don't trust myself around children, though, or else I'd be babysitting all the time. It's been eight months. None of the people from the forgotten place have visited, but I've seen faces that make me do double-takes while shopping or strolling through the park, since I'm still in New York.

I turn away, knowing I shouldn't prod. I'm always afraid I'll remember more. I suppose I could try calling that man to do it again, make them gone for good, but I'm afraid. Afraid of those images. So I decide to take a walk back to the park. Maybe there will be a yoga class there.

The walk is long, and dreary. Everybody's faces are hidden, shadowed with fear. When I finally reach Central Park, it starts raining. Storming. Lightening streaks across the sky, and thunder echos angrily. I feel stupid for leaving my apartment when there are Super-Villains out, even though my apartment isn't exactly 'safe'. I run blindly in what I assume is the direction back to my apartment, amid a chaotic, screaming throng of people. Cold laughter rings in my ears, and debris crashes all around me. I've walked right into the middle of the scene. Stupid, stupid me. I desperately want to help, but I've built a normal life, a happy life, and I'm afraid to let go. People, in utter terror, are trampling over others, stampeding in their rush to safety. I am shoved against a tree, a rather tall, strong tree, so I do the best thing I can think of: I climb it.

Clinging to the branch, the wind whips the leaves across my face. Superheroes are fighting, I can see them. I close my eyes, then open them again, trying to calm myself, but I can't. So I am doomed to watch, a mere witness who has done nothing to hurt, but also nothing to help. The man in the cape laughs coldly again, but I can see a boy in a green costume, with a yellow bandana tied over his eyes and a glowing hand running toward him. Just as I think he'll smash the man in the cape, he crumples to the ground. Behind the boy, a lady in a long purple dress cackles, then waves her hand toward me. The boy crashes into my tree, and lays there. I close my eyes, trying to tune out the battle before me. I know civilians are dying, I can feel it inside me, a pang wrenching my gut every few minutes.

After what feels like eons, a huge wind sweeps the area, and I open my eyes to see the man in the black cape gone, and the superheroes rushing away. Probably chasing the villains, I suppose, as, shaking, I unsteadily crawl done the tree.

The boy is slumped against the tree, still. I feel terrible for him. His mask has slipped away, revealing a handsome face and shoulder-length blonde hair. Carefully, I kneel and feel his chest. There is a faint rising and falling, rising and falling. He's alive. Barely.

I notice something shiny near his back, and I look more closely. A long rod of metal is driven into his back. Something inside me shatters for the boy. I stand up. Surprisingly, there are still cars driving away, taxis dashing off. I hail a cab.

Then, I lift the boy into the backseat. The driver doesn't say anything- he must realize that lots of people were injured. "Hospital?"

I shake my head, stuttering out my apartment's address instead. I know that the hospital won't take him, not now. That man with the cape- there's something about him that I know I should remember, but can't. Anyways, I realize that the city's going to change, now, or is already changing. The hospital can't help him anyways, nobody can survive that stab. I know he'll die, but better that he die peacefully than with his enemies.

When I get out, I drag him into the scarcely used elevator, then into my apartment. I lay him gently on my bed, on his stomach. I kneel down, grasping his hand and closing my eyes. I can feel all the energy around me, but I concentrate only on the boy's. Not to find out about him, just the wound.

It's punctured his lung.

I open my eyes, and lean against the bed, swaying. I can't pull it out- that would kill him. I don't know what to do. So I drag over my stool from the counter, and sit there, holding his hand and crying. Crying. Letting the tears fall. I don't even know why I brought him here anymore, why I did anything I did.

When I feel his hand tighten around mine, it only makes me sob harder.

**So? How was it? Review, please!**

**-flying feather scribbles**


	2. Gone?

**Thank you for the reviews! ;-) **

**DISCLAIMER: don't own Ultimate Spider-Man, only my OC Emmaline, the idea, & any poetry, so don't sue me, please. **

**Chapter 2: Gone?**

"_**Sometimes, people can go missing before our very eyes.**_

_**Sometimes, people can discover you, even though they've been looking at you the entire time.**_

_**Sometimes, we lose sight of ourselves when we're not paying enough attention."**_

_**-Cecelia Ahern**_

_I couldn't believe it. Not until we really couldn't find him. I could've sworn Danny was right behind me. Ava just gaped at me when I asked her where Danny had gone. Even Nova was speechless. We couldn't find him._

_S.H.I.E.L.D. knows now. We thought they'd be able to help us. With all the high-tech gadgets, all we found was blood. A sample revealed it was Danny's._

_That was a lot of blood. Scattered. _

_I don't know who the bad-guys were. If Fury knows, he's not telling. One was some sort of witch. The other, a man in a cape, decked in red and purple. Maybe they kidnapped him. Fury says Danny's dead, or else they'd have picked up a signal. Ava says all of our equipment has been spotty lately, though, and I agree with her. The alternative isn't a possibility. Danny can't be dead._

_Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. DEAD._

I wake in cold sweat. I guess I fell asleep on the stool. I'm still holding the boy's hand. Realization hits me like a bucket of ice-cold water. He has friends. Friends who care about him, who are looking for him. So he's with S.H.I.E.L.D. Well, they won't be able to find them, I know. Tracking devices don't work near me. By the time they would get here it would likely be too late.

I have to stop thinking like that. I have to help this boy- no.

I have to help Danny.

I shift my weight off the stool, not wanting to let go of his hand. If I'm going to help him, I'll have to let go a bit. What if the memories come back?

This is a life. That's worth more than anything.

My stomach twists into a nervous knot, but I push the feeling away. If I'm going to try to help, that will just make it worse. Questions run through my head. How much energy should I give him? How? What if it makes him worse? What if I kill him?

I shake my head. No. This will work.

Carefully, I let go of his hand. I brush a lock of hair off of his eyes before going to the bathroom to splash cold water on my face. Then I start preparing.

If- no, when- this works, Danny will probably wake up. He'll need, um... food? Water? When people are sick, don't you give them chicken noodle soup? Well, I'm vegetarian, so that's not going to work... Instead, I warm oatmeal in the microwave and get a glass of water with a straw in it.

Sighing, I bind my hair out of my face. I look into Danny's face for a minute, then grasp both his hands in mine and close my eyes.

The rush of energy floods to my fingertips, and I slowly let it flow into him. The flood overwhelms me, though, so I'm lost in a current of bright white light, concentrating only on the flow of energy into Danny.

Suddenly, I feel a little bump, and I jerk my hands away, falling off of the stool. I feel dizzy and drained. Slowly, I stand, the world jerking itself around. I hear a moan, and turn around way to fast, to face Danny.

A living, breathing Danny.

He's still alive! Now he's waking, too. His eyelids are fluttering. "Oh... watching... Chi?...no..." He's muttering now, and his eyelids still flutter up and down. I hurry to the kitchen, grabbing the oatmeal and water, then hastily setting them on the stool and kneeling next to his bedside.

I don't know how to prop him up so he can swallow properly. I don't want to drive the rod deeper into his back- what if it tore his lung more? The only thing I've given him is energy, to keep him going a bit longer, to try to make him heal. He still needs food, and water, and he's still di- no. I can't think that anymore. I just have to help.

Maybe if I carefully roll him over so that the rod is positioned between two pillows that he can lay against...? I try, but he's really heavy. Eventually, I manage to get him sitting up. By that time, both of us are gasping for breath.

Danny's still not awake, just muttering. I busy myself with piling blankets on top of him, trying to make sure he's warm enough, because Danny's starting to shake. It's probably just his muscles spazzing, but I'm not taking any chances.

I slump down against the bed. After a couple of minutes, I stand back up and just look at Danny for a long, long time. His breaths are ragged and forced, his eyelids are fluttering, he's really pale, and he's still shivering, but he's alive. Eventually, I realize that I'm not going to be able to feed him unless he wakes up. Carefully, I realize that I'm going to have to give him more energy to do that. Not in the same way that I did it before, but just a light touch. I shake my hands until my fingers have a light buzz in them, then touch his hand again.

Immediately, he moans and grabs my hand. I can't get him to let go, and I realize that he's awake now. Quietly, I say, "Hi. My name is Emma. I'm just going to give you some food, okay?"

Danny's eyes widen, and I see his lips trying to form some word that he can't seem to get out.

"Meat? No, it's oatmeal, okay?"

Danny closes his eyes, and I'm surprised to see the corners of his lips lifting into a faint smile. I gingerly bring a small spoonful of watered-down oatmeal to his cracked, dry lips, and they part enough for me to insert the spoon, then remove it. I watch him struggle to swallow. After a minute, he finally manages to get it down. I don't think he will be able to get anything more down. As soon as I turn around to bring the bowl to the sink, however, I hear Danny being wracked by dry coughs. I hurry back, and hold the straw up to him. Danny manages to suck some water up, but it just makes his coughing worse as it comes right back up.

"Are- are you okay?" I whisper the stupid, pointless question. Those beautiful, sad eyes turn to me, and I want to hug him. Instead, I put his hand in mine and squeeze it. Weakly, Danny squeezes my hand back. "I- I'm trying to- to help. Help you. I- I found you. You- your friends are- looking. For you. They- they do- don't know you're here." I can't meet his gaze, because we both know my foolishness. When I look back at him, Danny's sleeping. If you could call it sleeping.

I feel terrible. Staring at the bed, I see that the sheets are bloodstained from where he was laying last night. I know I should call S.H.I.E.L.D., but I can't. He's going to die, I know it inside the way I always do. His friends will only make it worse. Wait- maybe, if I found his friends, but not S.H.I.E.L.D.?

I can't leave him, though. He knows he's going too, I can tell from the look in his eyes. I've seen enough people die.

Sighing, I brush another few locks of hair off his forehead before curling up into a ball and laying there, sobbing.

**I'm sure there are mistakes- it's 1 AM after all- but I really want to post this for you guys now, hopefully I'll give it a little edit and proofread later. Sorry! Hope you enjoyed it! Drop a review off and come back soon!**

**-flying feather scribbles**


	3. JJJ

**Hi! :-) Sorry if the chapters aren't very long, and have typos, I'm writing them in one sitting without editing, so they're probably not the best, but I feel bad making you guys wait too long for another chapter, so I'll try to keep updating often. I only have a fairly vague plotline, so if you have any ideas or anything that you want to happen [I'm guessing from the reviews you want Danny to live ;-)] I'd appreciate them. :-)**

**Chapter 3: JJJ**

"_**The world is a dangerous place to live;**_

_**not because of the people who are evil**_

_**but because of the people who don't do anything about it."**_

_**-Albert Einstein**_

I stare in utter disbelief at the television. J.J.J. isn't complaining about Spider-Man today. No. Why, you ask?

He's finally won. The laws are changed. I don't know why, or by who. I guess society finally agrees with the ignorant self-inflicted man after that fight. Why, really, though? How could this happen? How could all people who fall under the category of "superhero" or "mutant" be banned?

How could being a "superhero" be illegal? I already knew that mutants like myself aren't exactly loved by the public, but superheros- no. I was right.

I hate being right.

I only turned the TV on to see if anybody knew who the 'villains' were from that fight. Oh, gosh. And here I was, thinking things wouldn't get any worse, just go uphill from here. That's what I'd convinced myself after that good cry this morning. Hard to believe it's only been a few days.

At least Danny's alive.

I ignore the cascade of objections that tumble into my mind, instead walking back over to the sleeping Danny. S.H.I.E.L.D.'s done for. I guess I might as well call one of his friends. The only person I know for sure he was with was Peter Parker, so I resign to looking him up in the phone book. Once I've found the number, I dash to the telephone and dial before I can lose my courage.

"I can't talk now, M.J.! I told you, I'm really busy right now! Would you _please _quit calling me back?!" a voice snapped into the phone.

"Um... this isn't M.J. ..." I stutter.

"Oh, a, oops." There is a long pause, then, "Well, who is it?" He sounds stressed and annoyed.

"You don't know me, but, erm, I, er, have your friend, Danny." I hate how awkward I sound, but I don't know how else to put it. There's a really long pause.

"Uhhhhh... are you sure? He's, um, a blonde surfer dude who's a Kung Fu master, and he's sort of missing- as in, nobody can find him..."

"Yes. If you want to, uh, come and see him, my apartment is in the building three blocks off of Central Park, on the 8th floor at the end of the hallway. He's hurt." I don't know what else to say to him, so I hastily hang up, even though I know it's rude. Now it's just Spider-Man's choice if he comes or not. I do realize that, well, he probably is going to have some trouble just walking down the street, being a 'superhero', but I guess that he could just, you know, dress as Peter Parker and hope for the best.

I don't know why I called Spider-Man. I guess because I know he's a close friend, and that they're looking for him. Really, though, I don't think it will take long for the 'secret identities' to be discovered, so he'd better think of something for him to do.

I walk over to the bed and sit there, thinking about the mess I'm in. Being a mutant, I'm not even legally allowed to be in this apartment right now, plus I'm with Danny, who's still in his 'superhero' costume. Great. Even if I trusted the government, I can't take him to the hospital at all. I knew it. At least I didn't bring him there.

Danny groans again. I really wish I had some magic medicine to make him better. Even painkillers would help. I don't take over-the-counter meds ever, though, so I don't even have ibuprofen or aspirin to give him. All I've got is a bed for him to sleep on, pretty much. I still don't trust myself to take the rod out, which probably needs to be done. I don't have any fancy equipment to help him breath, or give him fluids, to keep him alive.

I sigh. I remember seeing Danny at the organic foods shop a few blocks away, sometimes. He was with a group of other people then, and I didn't pay much attention. New York City's a big place, with lots of people, after all. I've seen him on TV too, when I bother to turn the thing on.

Standing up, I stretch my arms. I'm tired, and hungry. Careful to keep an eye on Danny, I walk to the kitchen and make myself a bowl of cereal. As soon as I start eating, I realize just how hungry I've been, and gulp the rest down in a few short minutes. When I return to the stool by the bed, Danny's eyes are opening. Sleepily, he blinks, then looks around the room.

"Hi," I smile, trying to hide my concern. I mean, this _is _a pretty big mess right now...

Danny just looks confused. His beautiful green eyes dart up and down, stopping at me, then widening. "Where- where am I?"

I blush. "Um, my apartment in New York City. I found you, uh, hurt." He frowns. I stand up to get him something to eat, at a loss for words.

"You should probably eat. What do you want? I, um, don't eat meat, so ..."

Danny looks up at me, and his eyes meet mine. Inside, I can see him smiling at me as his eyes twinkle. "I do not eat meat either. All forms of life have value."

I start, surprised. Hastily, I ask him, "Do you want more oatmeal?" Once I see him nod, I busy myself microwaving some.

Danny breaks the silence. "Why did you save me?"

I stare at the dirty rug underneath my feet, trying to look interested in the faded flowers. "I... I saved you because... because... because you're a person. A good person. A really good person. A superhero. Busy saving the world."

He looks at me. "One who- who-" he breaks into a fit of dry coughing. I run over to him, kneeling urgently beside the bed.

"Danny? Danny? _Danny?!_"

When the coughs subside, he sits there, breathing heavily. His ragged breaths pierce my heart, one by one, and I hate myself even more.

"How- how do you... you know my- my name?"

I stare at him, then turn my head away. "Here's... here's your oatmeal." As I turn to walk away, Danny grabs my arm and whispers between torn breaths,

"Thank you."

_Peter's POV_

I stare at the phone in my hand disbelievingly. What the-? Who on earth just picks up injured people on the street and kidnaps them?

Apparently this girl. Who didn't even mention her name.

What's she going to do to Danny? Is this a trap? Probably. I mean, it's not like everybody knows that I'm Spider-Man- right?

"Come _on_, Web-Brain. We're going to go look around the park again. _Hell_O!" Sam waves his hand in front of my face. "Yoo-hoo!" Stupid buckethead.

"I- I think I've found him. We've gotta hurry. Danny's in danger."

Once Sam has recovered from my shocking statement, he rolls his eyes in an exaggerated way. "Duh. You really _are_ a Web-Brain. We can't even leave this house, remember, stupid? Weren't you there when J.J.J. announced the new laws? Oh, right, you're _not_ right in the head. Nock nock! Anybody home?!" Buckethead demands.

"It doesn't matter. We've gotta go help him. Get the others- we're leaving NOW!"

**So? Not too bad... right? Please review! Thanks x a billion to those of you who have already! :-D**

**I'll probably update again soon!**

**-F.F.S.**


	4. SHIELD

**Thank you for the reviews! :-) Again, if anybody has any ideas for the story, I'd appreciate it. ;-) I'm trying to update pretty often, tell me if the chapters are too short (my goal is to make them around 1,300+ words, as much as possible, basically, but sometimes they do end up shorter than that...). There have been lots of views, so thank you everybody who's reading too! I've had 23 US visitors, 2 Australian visitors, 3 German visitors, 3 visitors from the UK, and even 1 visitor from Malaysia, so thank you all for reading! :-)**

**Chapter 4: S.H.I.E.L.D**

"_**How ridiculous and how strange to be surprised at anything which happens in life."**_

_**-Marcus Aurelius**_

_Peter's POV_

Of course, it takes them just about forever to get over here. As soon as I've shouted some sort of half-explanation over my shoulder, I open the door and am about to dash out when Ava slams it shut in front of my face and steps in front of me.

"You _do_ realize this is probably a trap, right?"

I shrug indifferently. "He's our _friend, _Ava. We've got to go help him! We're just wasting time here!"

"And I'm guessing that you've forgotten we've technically been outlaws ourselves since, oh, three this afternoon and there's _no way_ we can go out in public? And that now, S.H.I.E.L.D.'s tracking us down?"

"Yeah, S.H.I.E.L.D.'s tracking us, so therefore, since they know where I live, we should _probably_ get moving and throw away our coms!"

Ava just stares at me like I've lost it. Then she pulls out her com and throws it to the ground, crushing it with her foot. I realize I should do the same, except when I try to crush it with my shoe, it explodes over the carpet. "Owie owie ow!" I holler, hopping around on one foot as Luke stamps out the little flames that are beginning to creep across Aunt May's best carpet. Sam snorts, rolling his eyes and crossing his arms. Once Sam and Luke have (much more successfully) destroyed their coms, I start talking again.

"We're just wasting time, standing here, when she could be about to kill him!"

Ava puts her hands on her hips. "Who exactly is _she_? How do we know anything that she said was even truth?! This is a total trap, and we're walking right into it!"

"Well, yeah, but I don't see YOU coming up with any ideas!"

She pauses. "Fine. But if we die, I'm _so_ blaming you. Now, web brain, how exactly are we supposed to get to _her_ 'secret hideout'?"

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-M-M-**

_Emma's POV_

I yawn, settling down in the armchair for some real sleep. I feel terrible for not being awake for Danny, but he's actually sleeping really well right now, not the tortured half-sleep of before, but a real, deep sleep. So I guess I can't really do anything for him right now. Plus I can't go forever without any sleep, or else I'm just going to collapse. It doesn't take me long to fall asleep, happily greeting the blissful state of rest.

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-M-M-**

_Peter's POV_

This is not going so well. First, we took a taxi to central park. Actually, we were stuck splitting up into two taxis because we couldn't all fit in one. Ava and Sam were in one, and Luke and I in the other. We arrived at Central Park pretty easily, but everything after that it has been downhill. First we walked three blocks one way, but that brought us to some fancy office buildings- no apartments. We realized she probably meant the other direction. "Duh," Sam said to everybody. "Told you so."

He didn't.

Now, we have about five dingy apartment buildings in front of us. They're all great places for a kidnapper to hide with her victim, but that still doesn't help us figure out where to start. So we do the obvious thing, and pick the first one and go from there. We take the elevator to the eight floor and- viola! There's an excellently dumpy, filthy hallway with a door at the end of it. I resist from telling my teammates 'I-told-you-so' as I cautiously knock on the door.

No answer. Typical. Ava smirks at me. I try again. _Knock knock knock. _Again. And again. "I'm going to break this door down if you don't open up right now!" I imagine how embarrassing this will be if there's just nobody home, or if we walk in on a little old lady doing her knitting. Just then, a man walks out of one of the rooms on the side of the hallway.

Sam uber-politely asks, 'Excuse me sir, but who lives here?"

The elderly man begins to howl with laughter, tears running out of his eyes. "Live- live there?" he manages between chuckles. "Just old Mr. Broom and his friends."

We exchange glances, then Ava whips open the door to find-

A janitor's closet.

Biggest. Fail. Ever.

Once we're done shouting at each other, we check the next two buildings. One of them doesn't _have_ an eighth floor (more embarrassment there) and the other- well, let's just say that it had surprising similarities with my nightmare of walking in on a little old lady with her knitting, except with a middle-aged man and a towel.

By the time we get to the eighth floor of the fourth building, it's eleven at night. Everybody is tired and disappointed. Ava hasn't even bothered to gloat. Luckily there's an eighth floor in this building. It's just really, really broken down. Half of the lights in the hallways flicker, and the other half just don't work at all. Weirdly, at the end of the hallway on the eighth floor, the light above the doorway is on, and it's not flickering. We exchange looks again. Luke knocks loudly on the door. It's a really beat up door, made of flimsy, cheap, dented wood.

Inside, I can hear rustling, and the sound of muffled footsteps approaching. There's the sound of a lock clicking, then-

"Who's there?"

It's the same girl's voice that I heard over the telephone, except sleepier this time. Well, I guess we can establish that she has normal sleeping times and is therefore not a vampire nor a zombie.

Ava looks at me, obviously expecting me to answer. "Uh... Peter?" I manage.

"Peter who?" She doesn't sound sleepy anymore. Now she's suspicious sounding, and nervous. The door itself is starting to quiver, and we back away.

"Peter Parker," I say, unafraid.

The door opens to a, a- teenager around our age? Not what I was expecting. She looks really worn out. Like, worn out to the point of collapsing. There are dark circles under her bespectacled brown eyes, and her hair looks as if it may once have been in a long braid, but now it's sticking out at strange angles. At least she's dressed normally- jeans and a stained purple tee shirt, although she _is_ barefoot. I can tell she doesn't trust us from the way she's standing- stiff and nervous. "What do you want?"

Huh? She's the one who called me, not the other way around. She should know why we came. "Uh... to see our friend?"

Her eyes narrow. "What friend?"

I gulp. I've got a really bad feeling about this. "Danny... er, Daniel Rand..."

She visibly relaxes, and moves aside to let me in. When Ava, Luke, and Sam step forward, though, she looks suspicious again. "Who are you?"

Ava casts a glare sideways at me. "I'm Ava, a friend too. And the tall guy is Luke. The buckethead over there is Sam." The girl looks over them, uncomfortable.

"Fine." She lets them in.

The room is small, dark, and cramped. There's another door across the room, an itsy kitchen, and an armchair beside a bookshelf. She leads us over to the armchair and sits down on the floor. When we just stand there staring, she tells us to sit, as she flicks on a dim lamp. Carefully, I sit down on the worn rug, and look around for any kind of weapon or trap. There isn't any. Actually, it kind of looks like the sort of place Danny would hang out, if it wasn't so, well, dingy.

"Where's Danny?" Ava demands. The girl glares at her.

"He's sleeping. Shush." I see her eyes wander over to the other side of the room, where I can make out the vague outline of a bed.

A faint sense of relief comes from us. "He's alive?" I whisper. The girl turns and looks me in the eyes. I squirm a bit- it's kind of discontenting, the way she seems to peer right into my mind. Then, slowly, she nods.

Danny's alive.

"There's other things you should worry about, though. Danny's alive... right now. But S.H.I.E.L.D.'s not going to leave you alone. The government knows your secret identities. There's nowhere for you to hide anymore."

Hide? As if! And what does she mean by, 'right now'?! Sam opens his mouth to protest, but Ava and I shoot glares at him, and he shuts up. Good.

Ava, instead, asks, "How do you know that? It's not like you know our secret identities."

The girl just looks at her. Then, slowly, she points to each of us in turn. "Spider-Man. Nova. Power man. White Tiger. And Danny's Iron Fist." We stare at her.

"How long have you known?"

"Years."

This girl really creeps me out. I'm just waiting for the Goblin or Doc Oc to jump out and yell, 'Boo!' I can tell Luke and Sam agree with me, from the way they're looking forbiddingly around the room. Ava, though, has a look of enlightenment on her face. "What's your name? Why'd you take Danny?"

The girl looks at her for a long time. "Emma. And I did what I thought was right at the time. I still think I did the right thing."

No last name? Really? I don't think this is the whole story, either. My spider-sense isn't going off, though- funny, if this is a trap, it should have been. But it hasn't, not this whole night.

"By taking our friend?!" I exclaim. Emma looks at me. I'm starting to really hate when she does that- it's creepy. Like she knows something we don't, and she's not going to tell us.

"I didn't take him, I told you. I found him lying underneath a tree, bleeding because he was _stabbed_. You left him behind. I saw you leaving. All of you. Nobody came back for him. I thought he was going to die. So I figured it'd be better to have him die here than with his enemies."

Creepy. This girl's a nut job. "Die? You said he's alive! But now you say he's _dying_?!"

"We're all dying. That's how life is. You're either dead or dying. Everybody dies."

"Fortune cookie number two, and a nut job also," Sam hisses in my ear.

"Shut up," I whisper back, even though I agree.

"I can hear you. I'm not deaf or blind, you know."

Again: Creepy.

"You can't move him. You'll kill him if you do. The hospital's and S.H.I.E.L.D won't take him. You know that. Just like you're going to be stuck here."

What the-? I knew this was a trap! Come on, Spidey-sense, you're letting me down here!

But Emma just shakes her head. "Good luck leaving. The government will track you now. They know." She gestures to the TV, which I didn't even notice was on until now. "They know your secret identities. J.J.J. just said so. They'll follow you back to your Aunt's house, and then they'll arrest you. And your Aunt. You can't go there now."

We stare at her. Then we realize she's right.

I hate how right this girl is.

**How was it? I don't think I did a very good job capturing Peter's voice, but hopefully I'll do better next time... Practice makes (almost) perfect, right? :-) I'll probably update again tomorrow or tonight (maybe both). Please... if you have any ideas, tell me! ;-)**

**-F.F.S.**


	5. Disaster

**;-)**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man nor the characters. The only things I own are the idea, my OC Emmaline, and any poetry you may stumble across during the story. So don't sue me!**

**Chapter 5: Disaster**

"_**The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you.**_

_**You just got to find the ones worth suffering for."**_

_**-Bob Marley**_

_Emma's POV_

I hate the way they're looking at me. I heard Sam's comment about me being a 'nut job'. They think I'm a liar, an insane criminal. I guess you can't blame them- they've seen so many criminals by now- I suppose it's not too different from me pretty much being a social recluse; I've seen so many people by now. I still hate Knowing this stuff, Knowing what they think and say about me. It's not my fault.

They're just realizing that they really are stuck here. Unless they want to make a run for it and risk everything, and leave Danny with an utter stranger- not an option to them, as I've guessed already. My knack for guessing what they're thinking is creeping the boys out- I know from the way they subconsciously flinch- but Ava recognizes me. From that one time that I should have Forgotten by now.

"Wait- so you mean we're stuck in this dump?" Sam demands. Ava casts a glare at him, but it doesn't matter. One person's trash is another person's treasure, and only Important things have made their way into this room and stayed.

"Well, practically, when you consider the other option of certain arrest," I say, standing up and walking into the kitchen. I turn on the tap, and fill a glass full of water. Clear, refreshing, cold water. As I sip from it, I notice they're all staring at me. "Would you like some water too?" I ask politely, my voice dripping with sarcasm. I know all too well that I'm being quite rude, but to be frank, I don't like these 'heroes'. Maybe they are good people, but not to me. That's normal, I suppose. Perhaps my lack of sleep is throwing me off; usually I don't have such a short rope.

Ava's the only one polite enough to bother answering. "Sure, thanks," she says, throwing her friends a look over her shoulder. I suddenly realize why they're all hesitant to accept my offer. They're afraid I'm going to poison them, whether intentionally or not. They're afraid of me. I turn my head from them, staring firmly at the wall.

"Here," I say, offering a warm smile and the glass of water to Ava. She accepts it with a loud 'thank-you', once again shooting a look at the boys.

I don't know if I believe Ava or not. Honestly, I know that none of them trust me. She's probably- no. I have to stop thinking the worst of good people I hardly know.

_You know them well enough_, a voice in my head tells me. Not in person, though. Not in their realities.

"Can we see Danny _now_?" Peter asks.

I look at him for a moment, then turn to Ava. "Here, Ava, you can come and see him. It's probably better if you go one at a time so you don't wake him." Even to me, my explanation sounds lame.

"Oh, uh, sure," Ava says, putting the water on the counter and following me. I don't bother turning on the lamp by my bed.

Danny breathing is ragged now. Beneath his eyelids, I can see his eyes moving rapidly, darting back and forth. I readjust the covers that he's kicked off, then move to the side so Ava can see him. She gently touches his hand as though to assure herself that's he's real, then stares firmly at the floor. I show her the rod, just so she knows how serious it is. Because, in spite of myself, I am starting to trust her.

When we walk back over to the other side of the room, her teammates are looking at her, obviously expecting an explanation. Ava chokes out, "Danny's... Danny's alive." She turns to me in disbelief. "He's still _breathing_." The boys appear surprised and confused, but I turn away, gathering up blankets to make them beds on the floor.

"Here. You can make your beds around here. Somewhere." I toss the blankets over my shoulder, curling up into a ball on my armchair and falling asleep. Blissful sleep.

_Where- where am I? Oh, no, I'm dreaming again. There goes a good rest. _

_**At least you are with a friend.**_

_I open my eyes. I'm sitting in a vast meadow, in a valley, across from- Danny? Is that you? Where are we?_

_**Yes. We are in... a more peaceful place. This is not a dream of mine, though. You created it. Where did you find such Dream knowledge?**_

_He's sitting criss-cross, in a relaxed position, but his eyes are sharp and alert. _

_I learned it from you._

_Danny just looks at me. Not with anger. Not with disbelief. Not with mistrust. Not with pity. He just looks at me as a person, as a... friend? He looks up._

_**Yes, I am a friend. How could I not be, after you saved my life. Though there are worse things in life than death, where I am is not one of them.**_

_Who are you, Danny? What do you do? All I know of you is what I've seen, and I don't trust my vision._

_I gesture to my glasses, earning a small half-smile from him._

_**A better question is, who are you?**_

_I don't even know anymore._

_Danny looks at me sadly. _

_**Maybe you are just looking in the wrong places.**_

_I don't know where else to look. I've been so many people, now. I know how others define me;_

_Freak. Mutant. Nut Job. _

_**There are no freaks. There is room in this Universe for everyone. **_

_**Mutant? Nothing is an accident.**_

_**Nut Job? Who ever said such a thing of you?**_

_Your friends._

_I'm bitter now. Those people, his friends, aren't any different than anybody else. Not in my reality. They treat me like everybody else ever has- a FREAK._

_**Nobody has achieved perfection as of this existence. Perhaps they have not been friends to you. I do not believe everybody has treated you this way. **_

_Everybody has._

_**What about me?**_

I wake up in a cold sweat to find I'm crying. Quickly, I brush away my tears, even though it's dark and there's nobody who will notice. Glancing at the clock, I realize it's 6 AM.

Softly, I tip-toe over the rugs to Danny. He's asleep, but one lonely tear is trickling down his cheek. I stand there, dumbfounded for a moment, before realizing that he's crying. In his dream, wherever he is, he's crying. Soon I notice that I'm crying too, as a tear drips onto his sheet.

"Danny, I'm sorry," I whisper. "So, so sorry." I lay my head on the bed, silently sobbing. Suddenly, I feel a warm, gentle hand stroking my hair. The tears ebb away, and I just sit there like that, breathing in and out, calming myself.

When, at last, I lift my tear-stained face up to face the world, I see who was comforting me.

Danny.

His eyes are still shut, but his breathing is steady, and he's still softly stroking my head. Trembling, I sit there until I can speak again.

"Danny? I'm sorry." My voice shakes, but at least I can speak. "You're- you're … you're different."

There's no answer, but I rest my head against the bed, and he keeps stroking. I glance up and see a small smile on his face. Then I just sit there, succumbing to the steady rhythm of my hand, basking in the wonder that there's one person in the world who cares, who will be my friend.

I must have fallen asleep, because I find myself being awakened later by loud, obnoxious voices exclaiming. Danny's hand is touching my head, and he is fast asleep. I am curled up against the bed. I don't want to get up, and feel the warmth of my friend's hand leave, but I know I have to.

Ava, Luke, Sam, and Peter are staring at me. I stand and walk into the kitchen, warming a huge bowl of oatmeal for everybody. Once it's cooking in the microwave, I lean against the counter, calmly gazing back at them. I remain that way until the oatmeal is done- then I turn my back on them, while I spoon the food into bowls for everybody. I walk around the room handing the bowls of oatmeal out. Finally, I sit down on the stool by Danny's bed, and eat.

"You can just sit on the floor," I inform them, because they are just standing there stiffly. The room feels tense. All four of them are looking rather angrily at me.

"What- what is the matter?" I hear a soft voice stutter from behind me. There is a collection of gasps of excitement from Sam, Peter, Luke, and Ava, then they dash over to Danny and start talking at once. I smile.

Their voices blend together, so I don't bother trying to decipher what they are saying. I still catch a few phrases here and there, though. Mostly, I think they're just happy to see him awake and alive. Especially Ava, who knows how bad things really are.

I know they still don't trust me, because I hear Peter quietly asking him what I'd done to him. Danny said, "She saved my life and became my friend." Peter can't hide his surprise. Some things can't be explained. Some things are sacred.

Today is the happiest day of my life. We don't all trust each other, but we are all Danny's friends, so we're all happy together. I know that Danny's still hurt really badly, but now he's awake, at least- and that's more than ample cause for celebration. Danny's healing, he's getting better!

Just then, there are three loud knocks on my door. _Rap! Rap! Rap!_ The room goes completely still.

"Open up! This is S.H.I.E.L.D.! You are under arrest!"

With a sinking feeling, I hear Peter whisper, "Danny's com." Then everything goes black as the room is flooded with pink gas, and the last thing I remember is shouting and a muffled thump as I hit the floor.

**;-)**

**-F.F.S.**


	6. The Eupnea

**Thanks for the reviews:**

**Aniwolfgirl**

**TheOnyxDragon12**

**leggo lover 99**

**DannyLover99**

**I hope these last few chapters haven't been too bad... and that they make some amount of sense- there are some references to Explosive Energy, which might confuse those of you who haven't read it, so I apologize. I also apologize if any chapters have been a bit corny or dramatic or rushed.**

**DISCLAIMER: Yeah, you know. Blah blah blah don't own blah blah blah DO own OC, poetry & idea blah blah blah don't sue please blah blah blah.**

**Chapter 6: The Eupnea**

"_**Cause sooner or later in life, the things you love you lose**_

_**But you got the love I need**_

_**To see me through."**_

_**-Florence Welch **_

_Emma's POV_

Ugh. Why am I so cold? Since when did the floor become so hard and metallic?

Wait- _metallic_?

Instantly, I sit up. I'm in a room, surrounded by metal walls. It feels as though I'm trapped inside of a giant iron cube. It's empty of anything other than me and, well, itself.

"Where am I?" I wonder aloud.

"The S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier," Nick Fury responds from the corner. Where did he come from? I make a mental note to myself of where he's standing so I can find a door later. (There is no way I'm staying here long.)

"Nick."

"Emmaline Carlson." He pauses for a long while, turns to me and asks wearily, "Do you know how long we've been looking for you?"

"Yeah. I'm not exactly an easy person to find."

"Hmph. We've certainly gathered _that._"

I look at him. "You weren't supposed to find me. I hide well, Nick. Especially when I have incentives. I know you just want me as a weapon. Plus, your cameras are way too obvious. I mean, look at how much energy they take- I was bound to notice."

Nick looks surprised, then says gruffly, "Well, you've become much more stable now. Stupid idea, it was Coulson's anyway. Didn't want to take you like that, yesterday. I was worried about what might happen, you know." He heaves a great sigh. "Government made me. I can't believe they managed to pass those laws. The president told me, he's trying to veto them. Til then I'm stuck following procedure. Doesn't mean I like it."

"Wait, Nick! Is... is..." I can't keep my voice from trembling. I'm losing the facade I had going with Nick- he knows me too well. I take a deep breath in, then manage to continue. "Is Danny okay?"

"What do you really think? He's on life support, but what would you expect. He'd have been dead in an hour if you hadn't take him. And you know that, don't you, missy? Anyway, they're going to surgically remove the rod. I would prefer to wait until this law's changed back, but we probably won't have any choice. You know the risks lung injuries like this."

All too well. I solemnly stare at the ground. "So, you mean, you're going to treat him? Legally, you can?"

"Well, you can't put somebody who's dead on trial, now, can you?" He takes a deep breath in. "Look, kid, I'm trying my best here. I can't promise you'll be okay, but I'll try my best." Nick waits for my answer.

I think. What have I got to lose? I was only trying to establish a life. The only person who's come to really matter is Danny, this past week. That's a sad statement, I know, saying that somebody who was a stranger a few days ago is the most important thing that's ever happened to me, but it's true. I've given up on seeing my family again. The only person who has made me care has been Danny. And he cares right back. "Just... just promise me Danny will me okay. Please," I beg.

Nick looks at me. "Kid, I can't promise anything."

"So- so you mean he's not going to live. You do. _Don't lie_." My voice is rising uncontrollably with anger.

He sighs. "The chances are slim. Trouble is, removing the rod will basically wipe him out. Leaving it there just drains his strength. If there wasn't this confounded law-"

"I could help him," I whisper, the tears starting to fall.

"Emmaline-"

"_Don't call me that._"

"Emma. You're only stuck here as a prisoner until the law's changed."

I turn away, curling up in the corner. Once Nick's gone, I let my sobs escape, howling my pain to the cameras in the corner. Eventually, my tears begin to slow, and my eyes droop as I fall into a tortured sleep, wrought with nightmares.

When I wake again, I resume crying. Just look at this. Everything I did for him will be for NOTHING because if some STUPID law that some IGNORANT insolent man made for HIS OWN benefit. He's just going to die. Die. Die. Die.

_There are worse things than death._

I cling to his words, my final and only comfort.

At least I've lived this long. I mean, for someone born to destroy the universe, I think I've done pretty well. Kind of. Maybe. Not really. No. Not at all. I let Danny down. I'm useless, worthless, a freak.

What have I accomplished? Lots of bad stuff. Writing poetry. Letting Danny down. In other words, NOTHING. My life has been as waste, I'm just stealing precious time from other people.

I fall back into the treacherous dreams, thrashing across the cold floor. When I awaken again, I realize something. I can spend the rest of my time here beating myself up, or I can hope. I can dream. So I decide to hope and dream.

Maybe the law will be passed. Soon. Then Danny will live. If Danny lives... what then? This is making me think, for the first time, of an actual future. My life, up to now, has been misery and waste. But that was out of my control; now I can control myself. Who knows how long I have to live? Especially if I give myself a _reason_ to live.

I have to do something with my life. I have to help other people. If I live for others, then I have nothing to lose- right? I'll... I'll join S.H.I.E.L.D. Be a hero. Finally accept Nick's invitation. I can still remember, when, after I'd just run away, when Nick caught up with me. Said he could help me. Then I caused a disaster or something, and ran, thinking Nick would hurt me for being unable to control it. He's been trying to convince me ever since. I broke up contact while I was at the Forgotten Place.

Now's time for a new start. That's my last thought before I fall into a blissfully dreamless slumber.

**M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M. M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M**

Pounding. What's that sound? I blearily open my eyes.

Peter's tugging my arm. "Hurry! Danny's heartbeat is slowing! He's almost gone!"

"WHAT?!" I run off after him, dashing through the passageways. "WHAT IS GOING ON?!"

Between breaths, Peter manages, "They- they revoked the law- temporarily- while- while Congress- de- debates- over- discrimination."

My heartbeat picks up. I can feel Danny nearby. He's almost gone- I can feel his energy leaving. "NO!" I yell, rounding the corner and skidding to a stop in front of a doorway. I bang on it, but before I can touch it, it crumbles up. Peter doesn't bother being surprised, and neither do I, as I run to the bed.

Danny's surrounded by machines. A monitor, with squiggly lines, shows his heartbeat. The line's nearly straight, and I dash over to his side. The others are there, and they are numb.

"He's gone, now," says Nick, as the doctor nearby shakes his head. Tears fall from my eyes, but I'm angry too. I look at those shut, deadened eyelids. There's only a faint trace of energy left. I'm angry- I can feel my whole body buzzing. In spite of myself, I lean down and give him one last gift- a goodbye kiss.

Oh... his lips are so soft. I slowly come up, crying silently. I see tears running down Ava's cheeks too. Nick's open-mouthed, though, staring at the monitor. Following his gaze, I see the lines picking up, faster and more frequent. The doctor's eyes are so wide that they seem as if they may pop out any second. "HE'S- HE'S ALIVE! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE...?!"

Oh. My. Gosh.

**M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M. M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M**

What's that sound? What's the beeping? Where am I? Then the thought hits me: Danny is ALIVE! A horrible notion follows; what if that was just a dream? A fantasy?

"She's awake," I hear a boy's voice say. I blink, and Peter's face comes into focus.

"It- it was a dream, wasn't it?" I groan, turning over and burying my face in the pillow, overwhelmed by sadness.

"What was a dream?" I hear Nick ask.

Sam answers. "I don't know. She must be delirious."

"Oh, shut up buckethead," Ava snaps. "She's just waking up. I mean, who blames her for fainting?"

"Still don't understand how he can be alive," says Luke.

My head snaps up. "Wait- Danny's ALIVE?!"

They all nod in unison. I sit up. I can't believe it. "DANNY'S ALIVE!" I'm grinning from ear to ear, filled with joy and amazement.

" And you _kissed_ him," adds Sam.

"DANNY'S ALIVE!" I scream.

"Shush, he's sleeping," Peter teases.

Wait, he's in this room? I look around me and realize that I'm in a hospital bed in the same area as Danny was in, except there are curtains around my bed. I'm wearing one of those white dresses. "WH- oh, where?!" I say, considerably quieter.

Nick steps forward. "You can't see him right now if that's what you mean. But he's right next to you kid- no! Wait!"

Too late. I've already jumped from the bed and turn the curtains aside. To the right of me are more curtains, and I quietly slip in. There is Danny. Alive and breathing.

By no means does he look healthy, though. He's pale, and has a machine helping him breath, not to mention needles pricking both arms, and various other things, but he's ALIVE.

From the place where I entered, I here Nick sigh. "She's gonna get it," Sam hisses to somebody.

"Grab her a chair," he says.

A S.H.I.E.L.D. officer brings me in a chair to sit in, and I sit there, just gazing at him. Danny is alive. I know that the others think I'm insane, but that's because they think I barely know him. Now I remember, though. I do know him. I'd just Forgotten him.

It doesn't matter though, because Danny's alive.

Danny is alive.

**So...? :-)**

**-F.F.S.**


	7. According to Fury

**J No reviews on the past few chapters, but I'll just keep going anyways. Somebody's bound to review soon…. Right?**

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own Ultimate Spider-Man. The only things I own are: My OC Emmaline, the idea, and any poetry you may stumble across. J**

**Chapter 7: According to Fury**

**_"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."_**

**_-J.K. Rowling_**

_Peter's POV_

Congress is still debating over the law. I don't know who's winning, and frankly, I don't care at this point. Yeah, it's important- very important- for me, but I can't bear the ups and downs. Always, there's something new happening that's good or bad, that has the potential to tip the scales dramatically. I can't bear the waiting, the drama, the tension. Ava's glued to the TV, watching the debates and giving everybody else a 'translation' of whatever complicated thing they've mentioned. Even Buckethead's there. Well, I guess Emma and Danny aren't. I'm pretty much just sitting around with them.

Danny's still pretty rough, to be honest. They're removing the rod tomorrow, and Emma's been helping him, I guess. She really annoys me. Just coming in like she knows him- trouble is, she really does seem to. I know Danny well, though (as well as you can get to know somebody like him, that is); I know about K'un L'un and his secrets there.

I feel bad for Aunt May. I'd go back with her, but I'm afraid of putting her in danger; the way Fury's talking, anything could happen at this point, and it's "better to be safe than sorry". I'm really tired of sitting around here. Danny isn't exactly in the talking mood, and Emma still seriously creeps me out. So, basically, I'm sitting here, not doing much while Danny sleeps. Emma is just sitting here too, across from me. She hasn't said anything much- when I came in, she didn't even acknowledge me, other than fixing her gaze on Danny.

Now, Fury's mad at me for this. Says I'm not giving her a chance. Like he knows her better than I do. I've already had a long argument with him over what's going to happen 'when' (nobody says 'if') the law's permanently done away with.

He said that Emma had decided to accept his invitation to join our team. Since when did Fury ever have an invitation for this girl to join? A. She's nuts. B. She's weird. C. Doesn't Fury tell us whenever he has a possible recruit?!

I mean, Fury hasn't even told us what she can _do_. What if she has some bizarre ability that she can't control or something? We don't know anything about her except her name. I tried searching the S.H.I.E.L.D. database for her, but I couldn't access the file- it said I needed another password to get in. There wasn't an extra password to find Dr. Doom's location, but there's a password to protect the basic information on this strange, random girl? Something's wrong here.

Emma's not exactly willing to talk to me. Already, she seems to ultimately detest me. Whenever I've passed her these past few days, she glares at me. Like she knows what I think of her or something.

This is a girl who lived in some beat-up apartment, and then found a random superhero hurt on the street and, instead of bringing him to the hospital, brought him there. Looking back, it's a really good thing she _didn't_ take him to the ER, but I still don't get _how_ she kept him alive. Now, she _kissed_ Danny, somebody she just met, and somehow saved his life. This is getting ridiculous.

So, now this girl, Emma, who's utterly insane, has apparently joined my team, saved my friend's life, and gotten me in hot water with Fury.

I really hate her right now.

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-**

_Emma's POV_

It's really awkward at the moment. I feel completely out of place here. When Nick offered me the chance to join the team once this whole law thing's over and done with, though, I accepted. Nobody seems apt to welcome me in the least; they're actually quite hostile toward me at the moment. I swear that Peter and Sam are _trying_ to get me to leave- every time I've passed them, they're talking rudely about me. To my face, Sam treats me okay, but Peter ignores me. Ava's been okay to my face, and I haven't really seen her talking about me when she thinks I'm not listening, but I can tell she doesn't trust me. Not that I blame her.

I couldn't stand waiting there by Ava, listening to the debates and legal stuff when I could hear other people whispering about me. I'm obviously unwelcome. They should realize that I'm here to stay. I've got nowhere else to go, nothing better to do. The only reason I haven't done this before is because I've been scared. Terrified that I'll lose control and hurt someone. Because I can feel myself getting stronger every day. Maybe this really will help me. It'll give me a chance to use this thing I'm stuck with, in a good way, and perhaps it'll help give me better control, since I won't be keeping it all bottled up. I even have a friend!

Now I'm sitting by Danny. Peter dropped in, too, and now he's sitting across from me. I couldn't bear to look him in the eyes and let him see that his words have hurt. Danny's asleep- a drugged slumber, mind you, but nevertheless, at least it's some sort of rest for him.

I might have regretted kissing him, if it hadn't saved his life. I know that the others think I'm weird for sitting here like I'm indebted to him, but I do owe him _my_ life now, so I truly am. Who cares what they think of what I do; no matter what, they'll think I'm crazy and uncontrollable until they bother to get to know me. I'm just getting used to being able to be myself, a person who can make choices. Choices that determine who you are, instead of being forced into a "live-or-die", "good-or-bad", "right-or-wrong" situation every day.

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-**

_2 days later_

I sigh happily to myself. It's odd how everything's suddenly going my way (mostly). The law has been abolished (for now- much of the public wants it back) in some of the states, including New York, and Danny had the rod removed yesterday. He's "on the mend" according to Nick, and apparently it's "because of me helping".

I'm officially part of the team. Officially. That, according to Nick, doesn't mean I get to go save people right now, although that's what Peter, Sam, and Ava are doing (and from what I've been hearing, it's not going so great without Danny- it probably doesn't help that lots of people don't _want_ them to come to the rescue; they came back splattered with tomatoes this morning).

Really, though, now I'm stuck in Nick's office, filling out papers that I really don't want to mention. Like, writing down who's my direct family. I don't even know if they're alive anymore, so I check the "not in contact for 10+ years" box. It's been eleven and a half years now- hard to believe.

The next written portion is about my childhood. You know, "Did people close to you ever abuse drugs?" and that sort of things. When I glance back to double-check my answers, I find it rather depressing. All my answers really give the impression that my childhood genuinely sucked, but it didn't seem _so_ bad at the time. I also have to fill out a part about if I ever ran away, which is painful to attempt to explain with words, especially since I hate this topic.

I can't really fill out the 'health' section

Then there's a whole bunch of agreements (so basically I can't sue anybody when something bad happens- and not _if_ something bad happens, _when_). Next comes the actual decision part. For example, do I want to live independent of the Helicarrier or in it? I think for a minute. It's not like I had that much going for me in NYC, so I check the "live in Helicarrier" box.

Finally, I have to explain my powers and any risks associated with them, plus how my skills "work" and how I acquired them.

**_Abilities_**_: Absorb energy. Control energy. Transfer energy. (All energy?)_

**_Practical use:_**_ healing. Destroying things. Decapitating people. Messing with things that use energy (function of them?)_

**_Risks:_**_ death. Destroying things. Making things malfunction/explode. I have a temper._

**_How_**_: with my mind?_

**_Additional skills_**_: Yoga. Taekwondo. _

**_Acquired by:_**_ am a mutant_

I don't really know what to put. I feel really awkward. At last, I sign my name for what feels like the millionth time. Nick gathers the huge stack of papers, then clears his throat as he sifts through them. "Risks: death, destroying things, making things malfunction/explode? Kid-"

"Yes?"

Nick sighs gruffly. "Never mind. Just… try to be patient, okay kid?"

I flash a weak smile. "Uh-huh."

Once he's finished and everything's 'in order', Nick tells me, "So you're staying here, are you? Go get your junk from that apartment, and bring it back so we can get you a room."

I stand to leave, but Nick interrupts me. "Oh, and bring Peter with you."

Great. I walk all over the Helicarrier to find him, before running into him in one of the corridors. Peter jumps back, as though I have some highly contagious disease. "Nick says you have to come with me to my place and help me get my stuff."

Peter's eyes widen, then he groans. "Well, 'least I can miss training," he grumbles, shuffling alongside me to a plane.

"Wait- we're taking _that_ to my apartment?"

He rolls his eyes. "How else will we get there?"

"Ah."

Riding in it is kind of fun, although I don't think Peter's too good at driving- he keeps jerking it up and down suddenly, then muttering under his breath. When we're finally there, he seems to realize that you can't really park a small aircraft in the street. Then he parks the small aircraft on the street and sidewalk, and hops out. "Not a word to Fury."

Once I'm in my apartment, looking around, I realize I don't need most of this anymore. So I grab a small bag and stuff all my books in there, plus my notebooks. In another, bigger tote bag I wrap all my little trinkets in some washcloths and stuff them in. A third backpack holds my clothing (I end up leaving the most stained, beat-up articles here and only taking my newer pieces- not that I have a lot of clothes in the first place) and toiletries.

The whole time that I'm doing this, I can see Peter rolling his eyes in my peripheral vision. When I'm finished, I pull the backpack on, sling the tote over one shoulder, and grab the bag with my other hand, not bothering to make Peter help me, since he _obviously_ doesn't want to.

There's some trouble getting the aircraft flying again. Eventually, Peter gives up and just drives really fast down the abandoned road (the wrong way), using that as his runway. Back in the Helicarrier, Fury shows me my room and leaves me to unpack.

It's basically a square bedroom connected to a small bathroom with a toilet, sink, and shower. The only furniture is a bed and dresser with four drawers. Everything, the walls, ceiling and floor is made of metal. It doesn't take me long to unpack. Basically, I fold my clothing and put it in the dresser, shove the toiletries in a cupboard above the sink, unwrap my few trinkets and put them in a drawer, then place my books in the remaining drawer.

I shiver. The room is cold and dull. There aren't any colors, really, and it's a rather depressing place, almost like a prison. I know it's late, so I just go right to bed, but I can't fall asleep. It's too quiet. So I turn my CD player to an old favorite and fall asleep like that, peacefully.

In the morning, I awake to silence. Funny. You would think that a place with so many people on it would be noisier, especially in the morning when most people are just waking. Sitting up, I just stay in bed, thinking.

I really need to start getting along with these people better. They barely know me, and they already are starting to hate me. This is going to be a fresh start for me, now. I've got to stop losing my temper so much- I have to be more patient, like Nick told me to.

Quietly, I slip out of bed and take a long, steaming hot shower, taking my time to think about this. Afterwards, I braid my hair and slip on one of my nicer shirts and newer jeans, before noticing a uniform. A superhero's uniform. For me.

Wow.

I don't know who designed it. The fabric is tight but stretch and durable. I pick up the mask, and try it on. It covers the top half of my head, with eyeholes, arching over the bridge of my nose, and it's a deep midnight blue. I can't wear my glasses while it's on, though, so I realize I'll have to wear contacts when I train. Rats.

Next I try on the uniform itself. The pale, sky-blue shirt rises up to my collarbone, leaves my shoulders and a bit of my upper arms bare, then reconnects with long, dark blue sleeves. There is a creamy white symbol on the front which I recognize as the symbol for universe: a weaving line that looks like three triangles with rounded bottoms all formed by one strand. The pants are basically leggings, the same shade of blue as the shirt, and reach to my ankles. For shoes, there are a pair of midnight blue boots that cling to me so tightly it's hard to believe they're shoes and not fabric, and which rise a little less than halfway to my knees. I'm thankful that there isn't a wedge or a heel to push me off balance. I notice one last article of clothing; fingerless gloves, the same midnight color as the boots, sleeves, and mask.

I walk over to the bathroom and look in the mirror. Woa. You can't even recognize me. Usually, I wear fairly loose clothing, but this fabric clings to my skin, and you can actually see my shape. I look way older and more mature. I try moving to see what it looks like, and I see that the fabric shimmers in the harsh bathroom light. Then I realize you can see my tattoo on my shoulder, because the shirt is shoulderless- duh. Oh, rats.

Suddenly, a slip of paper falls out of one of the gloves. _Meet training room 1c ur dressed & showered 2. _

**How was it? My longest chapter yet! J Can't wait for some reviews! Please!**

**Thanks for reading! **

**Flying Feather Scribbles**


	8. Leaders

**Thank you for the reviews, TheOnyxDragon12! ;-) I finally have the plot all finished, but the chapters might be considerably slower coming out now, because there are numerous little details I have to fit in (plus the internet's really faulty at the moment). **

**DISCAIMER: You know the drill. I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC Emma, the idea, and any poetry you may stumble across.**

**Chapter 8: Leaders**

**_"Either we're a team or we aren't._**

**_Either you trust me or you don't."_**

**_-Ally Carter_**

_Emma's POV_

That first training session was hard. Not because of the actual training part, but the team portion of it. I think that they still half-blamed me for their secret identities getting out, although S.H.I.E.L.D. said they had done a major mind wipe of the public.

It didn't help that I'd become lost on the way there. The Helicarrier is a big place, maze-like in many ways, and I didn't know my way around then. Even now, nearly two months later, I still get lost sometimes. When I found the training room at last, and had walked in, I saw that Sam, Luke, Peter, and Ava were all waiting for me.

"Sorry," I stuttered nervously.

"It's fine," said Ava, and she gave me a wan smile.

During the session itself, I continuously called my teammates by their real names instead of their codename. I could do the whole fighting part on my own just fine, simply using whatever Taekwondo movement sprung to mind. I didn't dare to use my 'power', being terrified that I'd hurt someone. Nick didn't push me to, then- I think he realized that I was going through enough of a change as it was.

However, Nick did shout at me to 'work as a team'. I had no idea what to do that would qualify as 'working together'. Ava was yelling out complicated team maneuvers that may as well have been an alien language for all I could comprehend of them. By the end of the session, I know that Sam was making lame jokes about me behind my back, but I was too exhausted from attempting to communicate with these people that I just went back to my room and flopped onto the bed.

Things have improved these past few months. Now I can usually guess what Ava means in training and attempt to follow her orders. Peter still doesn't say much to me. Sometimes I could swear that Sam is flirting with me, but he seems to do that to everybody, and Ava says not to pay any attention. Luke is nice enough to me, I suppose, though he doesn't say much and generally seems to avoid talking to me outside of training sessions.

Danny's been doing a lot better. He stayed in the 'hospital' area for about a month, then rested for a week before coming back to training. Nick makes him stop to rest often, and doesn't let him go on missions, though, because he has only been back for three weeks. Danny's really friendly to me. I usually can't help laughing at some of the things he says that the others call "fortune cookie" remarks, because they are really quite true. Nobody else seems to get them, but I think they're kind of cute.

This is a new feeling to me. There have always been boys considered 'cute' I suppose, but I haven't ever felt this way about anyone before. Maybe I never had a chance to before. Now, whenever I see him or even hear his name, butterflies flutter in my stomach, my heart beats faster, and I think that I blush.

Really, the worst thing that's come out of this is going to school. Nick says I have to, since I should technically be in twelfth grade.

The classes themselves are easy, in my opinion. Once again, it's the people that bother me. Being around so many kids at once really makes my head hurt, with all the energy, both negative and positive and everything else in between, that I'm absorbing. It's constant. I know that the other kids there think I'm weird, so I stick to myself. I usually just stick my head in a book and stay like that until the day is over. They still shove me around a lot, but I can't think of any way to make them stop, so I just let them get it over with, knowing that protesting will only drag it out more.

My teammates leave me to myself, too. I think that Ava and Danny are making an honest effort to include me, though. I sit with them at lunch, right beside Ava (across from Danny). Peter avoids me at school. His friends, the boy and the girl, seem friendly, but he always leads them away whenever he spots me in the vicinity. Ava says he used to sit with them on some days, but now he always sits with that boy and girl.

When I get back from school, I always find it really hard to train. My head is pounding by then- school really drains me. I tend to go straight to my room, collapse on my bed, and listen to music until the session begins and I have to get up.

I haven't gone on any 'missions' yet, because Nick says I'm too unstable at the moment, and frankly, I think I'd have to agree with him. Next week, though, is a new month (June), though, and he says I can start then. Danny can too, as long as he's careful.

This morning is a Saturday, though. It marks the final week of the school year. I realize that after this, I don't really have to go to school! I'm going to turn eighteen on June 21st, and then I'm truly free from any binding laws.

Stretching, I swing my legs over the bed. It's nine- I always sleep late on Saturdays, worn out from a full five grueling days of school. I'm refreshed by the idea that today I'm free to do whatever I want.

Sighing, I go and eat breakfast, then come back to my bedroom. I shower and slip into some loose yoga clothes. I'm not sure what I want to do. Maybe practice my form for Taekwondo? I still love Taekwondo, like I have ever since my parents enrolled me when I was five. Since joining S.H.I.E.L.D., I haven't had much spare time to practice. Taking a deep breath in, I begin, going through the movements.

Whoops! I nearly knock over the dresser. This room is really too small to do this sort of thing in. If I still lived in my apartment, I'd go to Central Park and practice, but now, I know that Nick isn't likely to let me go. Maybe there's somewhere in the Helicarrier I could practice? I resign to find _someplace_ to go through my form other than my bedroom.

As I walk through the corridors in the Helicarrier, I notice many things that I haven't before. It's almost like I'm sightseeing, the way that I slowly stroll, taking my time to see everything that each portion of the Helicarrier has to offer. I'm so enthralled in my examination of some complex machinery that I walk right into somebody, and both of us stumble to the ground.

"Sorry," I mumble, standing. I see Danny, who has already jumped back up. He's wear casual clothing, not his uniform.

"It is fine. Accidents happen. What are you doing?"

I find myself blushing a little, and I hope he doesn't notice. "Just looking for somewhere to practice. I mean, practice my form. For Taekwondo."

He raises his eyebrows. "You are trained in martial arts?"

"Just Taekwondo."

"Could I see your form? I am trained in all forms of martial arts. Perhaps I could help?"

I blush and stutter. "Sure- I mean, please! But, um… you want me to show you here?"

Danny glances around. "No. This is a hallway. Perhaps you could show me in my bedroom? It is quite large- Fury moved me to a bigger room after I had broken too many lamps." He smiles. Coming from him, the friendly offer sounds completely innocent.

"Oh, uh, that would be great! If, I'm, not, um, bothering you?"

"Of course not."

Danny starts walking back the way I came, and I follow, clumsily tripping over my own feet in my haste. When we finally arrive there, I realize that his room _is_ much bigger than mine. There's plenty of floor space. The walls and ceiling are painted and covered with various paintings, and the floor is wood. Just like my room, there isn't much furniture; just a bed, dresser, and (unlike my bedroom) a bookshelf. In one corner of the room, a skillfully hand woven rug with golden fringes is spread out and bordered by candles, for (I assume) meditating.

Danny surprises me by breaking the silence first. "What form are you on?"

"I know all the forms already. I was working on reviewing the Cycle 3 Advanced Belt Black Tip form, Chung Mu."

He nods. "How many movements? What is the form named after?"

I swallow, racking my brain. "Um… it's named after a great Admiral- Yo Sun Sun I think- who lived in the Yi dynasty. Um… history credits him for, uh, inventing the first battle ship? And doesn't the last attack symbolize his early death? Um… movements… thirty?"

Danny shakes his head, a small half smile lingering playfully on his lips. "Not quite. The Admiral was Yi Sun Sin, not Yo Sun Sun. He did not invent the first battle ship either- he invented the first _armored_ battle ship."

I sheepishly direct my gaze at the floor. "Oops. Sorry."

Danny smiles at me. "Do not worry. Practice makes perfect."

"Almost perfect- there's no such thing as perfection," I correct him good-naturedly.

He grins back at me and says, "We are contained only by the walls we build around ourselves."

"If you say so," I tease, looking him in the eyes. To my surprise, his green eyes are sparkling with laughter. Danny really is laughing with me. "Hey, Danny, do you really know this form?"

"In its entirety. I may be a Kung Fu Master, but I have studied other forms of martial arts."

"Want to lead the form?"

**A/N: In Taekwondo, when people do a form together one person often 'leads', meaning that the other person/people follow the leader's movements and keep time with the leader. The leader often commands the bowing and jumbi. (A form goes like this: first you stand up straight with your hands at your sides and feet together [cheriot], then you bow [kinyay], next your left foot steps out and your hands go into fists [jumbi]. Occasionally there is a jumbi hana where you put your feet together again and put your hands in a heart or a fist. Then you go through the form. After everyone has finished all the movements and kiyuped [shouted] on the last movement, the leader says 'barrow', which is where you return to the jumbi position, then 'show', when you bow.)**

"Oh," Danny looks surprised. "Okay."

Once we've finished going through the form, Danny tells me some things I should work on. We go through it a couple more times, before he says he should meditate. I glance at the clock and am utterly shocked to see that four hours have passed.

I turn around as I am about to leave and say, "Hey, Danny? Thank you. It was great having some help. Maybe we could do it again sometime?"

Danny grins at me, his eyes twinkling, and replies, "Definitely. Next Saturday?"

"For sure. What time?"

"How about… ten?"

"Yeah. See you then!" I happily skip out, feeling the most lighthearted that I have in ages. Unfortunately, I'm not watching where I'm going again-

"Ouch!" Sam grimaces, rubbing his head. "Em, you really need to watch- hey, where are you going?"

I shrug. "Sorry! Oh, I'm not going anywhere. Just, you know." I shrug again.

Sam's eyes narrow, and he sees where I've come from. "Were you with Danny?" He doesn't even have to wait for my answer; it's written on my face- I can feel the red-hot blush creeping across my cheeks. "What were you doing?"

"Just, um… practicing Taekwondo."

"What's-" Sam is cut off by Fury.

"Alexander. I need to see you. Now. Come with me."

"Hey, but I was-"

The rest of Sam's comment is lost to me as I continue walking back to my room, finding myself skipping again (this time paying much more attention to my whereabouts). I end up spending the remainder of my day trying to read my book, but failing to concentrate on the written words as my mind wanders back and forth, often stopping on Danny. This is the most freedom I've had, the most lighthearted and carefree I've felt that I can remember.

I go to sleep that night with my thoughts still filled with the day's events, falling into a deep slumber.

_"No, no. Leave him alone," she cried, shielding me from the wolf pack. They snarled in response, baring their terrible white fangs, which glinted in the moonlight. The biggest of the pack stepped forward. The leader. He poised to jump, still snarling, and pounced. _

_Blood. So much blood. I shivered. They had dragged her away. I was too weak to stand, and my mother, my beautiful kind mother, was dead. Torn apart. I didn't cry; I was too numb with pain. All the blood. My dear mother's blood._

_Too much blood. Too much death. She was gone, I was alone. She was dead. Forever. _

_Oh, all the blood-stained snow, stinking of death._

I wake, gasping, in cold sweat. _It was just a dream_.

No it wasn't. My dreams are never just dreams. I swallow, turning over. What did I just see?

I just saw the murder of someone's mother by wolves, amidst freezing cold mountains. I was just a poor little boy, learning what death smelled like. Too young. That boy was too young to witness that. I can't stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks… It's been so long since I've had a Memory Dream, I'd forgotten how vivid and real they are.

Trying to calm down, I lay there in my bed, staring at the ceiling as though it holds the answers to my questions.

I don't fall asleep again that night. Finally, I get out of bed at five, and go through the motions of my usual morning routine, numb to all but my thoughts. There's no way I could've helped that boy, it was just a memory, but a haunting memory nevertheless. I don't even know the boy or his mother, but I can't help but pitying them both. I may have seen worse, but something about these people seems all too familiar and really hits close to home.

Home. Is the Helicarrier my home now? Is anywhere my home? If such a thing as a home exists, then this must be it, here. So this is what it feels like to have a home. I've had many houses, but never a home before.

A home holds your family, your life. It's where you return to after everything, and no matter where you end up, that place- your home- is where you'll always belong, always return. Is this giant metal Helicarrier truly my home now, after only a few short months? At the moment those months may have well have made up my entire existence, being weighted with all my happy memories. Do I have a family here, though? Are these people my family?

I don't know. I've always wanted a family. That's what I've been searching for. Friends who will be my family. _Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves._ These people, are they friends like that?

For all the time that I've known them in person, it feels like longer. I care more about them than my Forgotten family of my long-lost 'childhood' that never happened. I care about these people, these friends more than anyone else in the world, because they've let me into their home to make it my own. Does that make them my family?

That boy in my Dream- his mother loved him enough to die for him. She sacrificed herself. He loved her so, so much. Right then he lost his mother, his family, his childhood, and what sparse years that made up his life all in one moment. One moment that became a Memory, forever sealed by the blood spilled on that cold, moonlit night.

I've never known anybody like that. Nobody's ever loved me, few have cared for me, and no one has helped me. I never lost my childhood, because you can't lose something you didn't ever have in the first place. Now I wonder what having a few short years to be a child, carefree and young at heart, would have been like.

Even though it seems silly, I want to care about someone enough that they're a friend who is family, and that I truly love them for who they are so much that they could shatter my whole world, then put it together again, piece by piece. Somebody who will give me warm, comforting hugs and somebody to laugh and smile with, somebody to hold my hand with so we can walk through life's garden together, and help each other up again. Somebody who would take these small, torn bits of me and mend them into one again.

**How was the chapter? I'm sure you're tired of me saying this, but I'd greatly appreciate it if you'd drop a little review off before you leave! Thanks for reading! (My apologies for the A/N in the middle of the chapter, I didn't know how else to explain, I hope it made some amount of sense.)**

**-FFS**


	9. That Place

**Thank you so much for the reviews! =D**

**lego lover 99: You'll just have to wait and see (muhahaha). Thank you!**

**BowTies23: That makes me feel so happy inside. =) I try to update at least every day, I'm sorry. ;-)**

**Again, my apologies for the Author's Note about Taekwondo forms yesterday in the middle of the chapter, I hope it made some amount of sense.**

**DISCLAIMER: no own Ultimate Spider-Man. Do own Emma (OC), idea, and poetry.**

**Chapter 9: That Place**

**_"Remember that everyone you meet_**

**_is afraid of something,_**

**_loves something,_**

**_and has lost something."_**

**_-H. Jackson Brown, Jr._**

_Emma's POV_

It's the last week. I never have to go back there again. I'll never set foot in that place again after this week. Nobody can force me to go into that- that _High School _again.

That's what I've been telling myself the whole time at breakfast today, silently dreading the coming day. I know I shouldn't be afraid, but it's Monday morning again, and I have to go back there. Ava notices me playing with my oatmeal but not eating. "What's wrong, Em?"

Shrugging, I say, "Nothing." As though nothing could make your whole day miserable. As though Ava didn't know better than to think that I meant 'nothing'. She's known me long enough to realize I'm not a very open person, and for a very good reason. I simply don't trust everyone I meet anymore- if she had seen what I have seen, then she wouldn't either.

"Come on, what's the problem? 'Nothing' doesn't make you look this sad."

Ava and I are the only people at the table. Peter doesn't live in the Helicarrier, Danny's mediating like he always does on Monday mornings, Luke usually arrives at breakfast right as I'm leaving, and I haven't seen Sam _not_ sleep through his alarm clock yet. (S.H.I.E.L.D. really needs to get the sort of alarm clocks for us that you _can't _smash when you're half awake and frustrated- we're going through so many each a week that I'm doubtful that Sam even has an alarm clock now; he tends to ruin them on Mondays and Thursdays.)

I mumble, "It's nothing, I said."

"What is nothing?" inquires Danny as he walks in, despite the fact that he likely already knows the nature of our conversation.

"Nothing's nothing," I snap, standing up and shoving the oatmeal at him. "Here, you can have it, I didn't eat any."

Danny watches sadly, still holding the oatmeal, as I walk away. I guess he's remembering how lighthearted I was Saturday. Well, Sunday was a different story. I kept having these visions, during whatever I tried to do. Basically, I ended up sitting in my room all day, attempting to read but being interrupted every so often by brief images flashing through my mind. This hasn't ever happened before, but I think the dream triggered it. Since I've had it 'so under control' lately, it's just bottling up inside of me, and I don't want Nick to notice and have another 'talk' with me. I had the wolf dream again last night, so I didn't really get any sleep either.

By the time I'm at school, I regret storming out like that. It was probably better that I didn't tell them, though. School will be over in just a few more days, and this is nothing. Once I walk into the building, I bitterly realize that nothing has indeed become something.

The huge kids approach me, shouting insults. They throw the cruel, twisted words at me as if they bear no weight, and I try to pretend they don't affect me in the least, staring at the ground. These kids just don't understand; it's not their fault, really, it's just that nobody ever told them why I'm this way, and they immediately see me as an easy target. If they knew I am a mutant, then they wouldn't dare approach me.

One of them shoves me to the ground, kicking me. It's easier to just stare at the floor until they're finished, and stand up once they're gone. As soon as they've had their 'fun', that's just what I do; I go to my locker, grab my books, and walk to homeroom.

At the end of second period, though, my head is throbbing so badly I can't think. All these people, all these individuals have so much energy, they're so excited for school to be over. I'm stumbling over my own feet, hardly able to hold my books. I sway to the side, right into Danny's arms. Danny? How long has he been walking by me?

"Emma? Emma? Are you okay?" I can hear Ava shouting, but her voice is far away, so distant from all this buzzing in my hands.

I can see the blurred shapes of Sam and Luke above me- above me? Why am I lying here? "Weird," I slur, more to myself than them, before gratefully greeting the still, quiet black fog that's creeping over my vision.

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-**

"I do not know," I hear Danny saying.

"Well, there has to be something wrong, people don't just faint for no reason at all!" Ava is nearly yelling.

I feel so full, overwhelmed with power. Everywhere is buzzing, so fast, faster than I've ever felt it before.

"Guys, what's she doing?" I can hear Sam, sounding completely horrified.

"WELL, THIS JUST SUCKS!" Ava screams at the top of her lungs, over the buzzing.

"GET THE OTHER KIDS OUT OF HERE!" Now Peter's joining the shouting match.

It's so warm and cozy here, in this little bubble, this wonderfully swelling bubble of buzzing energy. The energy is moving even faster, and there's more, inside this little bubble, so overwhelming, it's just going to make this bubble pop, like a balloon!

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-**

_Ava's POV_

What the hell is she doing?! What's happening?!

Emma's in the middle of this huge rainbow sphere, which is making a really loud buzzing noise. I feel really jumpy and excited for no reason at all, and I'm fighting to keep calm. Well, my definition of calm, anyways.

"DO SOMETHING!" Danny still looks deep in thought, so I try again. "DANNY! QUIT THINKING AND ALL THAT CRUD AND HELP US!" That gets his attention.

"THE ENERGY SPHERE IS EXPANDING!" Danny (calmly) shouts back.

"SO?!"

"IT CANNOT KEEP EXPANDING FOREVER!"

I realize what he means. The sphere won't just keep getting bigger. Something else is going to happen. "WHAT IF IT EXPLODES? WHAT IF THE SPHERE THINGY POPS?!"

"WE MUST MOVE HER TO A SAFER LOCATION!"

I get what Danny's trying to say. We have to move Emma before that thing explodes, or whatever it's going to do. "HOW?!"

Danny doesn't reply right away. He just stands there. Finally, after what seems like an eternity of waiting, even though it was only a minute or so, he screams, "DO NOT TOUCH IT! THERE IS NO WAY TO MOVE IT!"

"HUH?!"

Peter shouts at us, "YOU WOULD BE USING ENERGY TO MOVE IT! KINETIC ENERGY! YOU HAVE ENERGY! YOU'D ONLY GIVE HER MORE TO ABSORB!"

"OKAY, SO WHAT DO WE DO THEN?" Nobody bothers to answer me. They're too busy herding students out of the school. Coulson runs up to us, but I can't hear his voice above all the racket.

I see Danny making his way, slowly, toward the sphere. What's he doing? The idiot, he's going to touch it! I'm too late, though, his hand is already reaching toward it, and then- Danny's gone?

What happened to him? What did she do to him? A million thoughts are running through my mind, but nothing can answer those questions.

"DANNY!" I scream, my voice hoarse, but there's no need to yell anymore; the noise, the sphere, they've all disappeared. It's suddenly, unbearably silent.

"Yes?" I hear a voice answer me from the place where the lockers used to be- now there's just a pile of crumpled metal with Danny sitting on it. Nothing else has been touched.

"Are you okay, dude?" Luke asks, helping him up. Danny doesn't answer. Ugh, sometimes that boy is so hard to understand. (Aren't all boys, though?)

"What happened?" demands Coulson, running over to examine Danny.

Danny frowns. "Where- where is Emma?"

I realize that he's right- Emma's not here. Where did she go now?! "Is she under the lockers?" If she is, there's no way she's even alive now. What did she do?

Luke and Sam rummage through the ruined scraps of metal. After a while, they shake their heads. Danny walks over to the middle of the hallway and bends down, picking something up. I walk over to see a necklace clenched in his hand. It doesn't look like anything special- just a small, ordinary stone on the end of a long chain. "Emma's?" I wonder aloud. Danny turns the stone over, and I see a small engraving on there.

"_'The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step'_. A famous quote from Lao Tzu." Danny clenches his fist around the stone. "Yes. I have seen this chain around her neck, though she kept the pendant tucked under her shirt. She wore it every day."

Woa. Sometimes Danny really surprises me; I spend at least as much time with Emma and I never noticed that. "So…?"

"It has a certain… magical aura. It would take her to the 'first step' of her journey, or wherever she is at this point in time."

"Okay, that made no sense whatsoever," Sam says.

"That would be a physical place my friend, not a philosophical one—for our purpose, anyways, though I do believe it is both in unison." Which makes no more sense than Danny's previous statement.

I frown. "Journey? What journey?" Danny opens his mouth to explain, but I cut him off. "Never mind. I don't want to know. The point is, where is she?"

"Wherever she is in her journey."

"Danny! I'm serious here! I need you to speak _English_!"

He sighs. "You have to first ask what her journey is."

Luke shrugs. "Dude, we don't know her that well!"

"Perhaps that was a mistake on our part. Each person has their own gift to offer to this world. Although… it seems to be that her life held no particular direction until now. Today, her purpose seems simply to live and learn. What role has she been assigned to lead in our lives? I sense it is a great one. Her power… it is strong. The very nature of it is destruction, yet she is a docile person. A person who fears her power. I would guess that her journey is learning to live and love in this harsh world, overcoming her power and finding the beauty in it. Unconsciously, though, she has much to teach to the world, and we, much to learn."

We stare at him. At last Sam says, "So… she's trying to control her power then? Okay… well, where would that put her?"

After today, I'd guess not very far. The Fortune Cookie is the first to reply, "I would say she has come quite far, yet has many miles remaining. The most recent step would be… S.H.I.E.L.D., correct?"

Cue the crickets.

"So that'd put her in the Helicarrier, Fortune Cookie? It would've been nice to get that _without_ the long explanation!" I exclaim impatiently.

"Well, let's go then!" says Sam. "Right after we suit up."

Duh, we didn't even have a chance to do that in this mad rush.

By the time we get back to the Helicarrier, Fury is furious. (Ha ha ha, I know. Bad joke.) "Where have you BEEN?" he barks. Nova Creep stutters some lame excuse about trying to figure out where to go. Fury laughs. "Right. So you sit around at the scene of the crime without your uniforms on, and try to decide if you should report back to base?"

I sigh. "This is my fault, Director Fury, sir. I should've just come back to you."

Iron Fist steps forward. "No, sir, it was me. My explanation has proved too complex and long-winded for my teammates to extract necessary information from." I'm surprised that he stepped up.

Spider-Man says, "I'm sorry, Director Fury, I'm the team leader, I should have taken charge." He steps forward and joins us. I catch him glancing back at Nova and Power Man, but they don't come forward. I suppose they don't feel like they played any part in the delay, but it still makes me angry that they've hung us out to dry like this.

Fury says, "Well, I hope that you three heave learned your lessons. Cleanup duty for one week. You can go."

"What about Emmaline?" I burst out. She's the one who caused this whole mess, after all.

"She'll wake up within a few hours. I don't know what happened back there, but Rand- I expect you to explain how Carlson got here, and help me piece together what happened."

"Yes, sir!" Iron Fist says, but he doesn't look as confident as he usually does. As we're walking away, I whisper to him,

"What's wrong?"

He just shakes his head and walks away, towards the infirmary.

**M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M- M-M-M-M-M-**

_Emma's POV_

Drowsily, I blink, and rub my eyes, then fumble for my glasses. A soft hand offers them to me, and I slip them on. "Danny?" He's sitting next to my bed. We're in the infirmary. "Where am I? What- what happened?"

Danny doesn't say anything. He's wearing his uniform, but he has taken off his mask. Just sitting there, with his long, blonde hair slightly ruffled, he causes the butterflies to begin churning inside of my stomach. He looks so kind and understanding, so beautifully open.

Suddenly I realize that there must be a _reason_ I'm here, that Danny is looking at me like that. "What- what did I do?" I whisper, terrified, my voice quivering.

Danny reaches out and touches my hand, and squeezes it. "It is okay. You are home now." Home? How did he know?

"How- how-?"

He smiles warmly, in spite of the situation, and hands me my necklace. "It would only bring you to your home. Look at the golden sparkle of the stone. You are at the stage of Discovery of home, family, friends, of love, loyalty- all of the little pieces of gold in time's river."

I stare into those eyes, but I only feel truth and something else coming from him- friendship? "What did I do, Danny? What happened?" I say, a lonely tear trickling down my cheek.

"Do not cry," Danny says, brushing the tear away. "You lost control. It is okay now."

"I- I lose control? What happened? What did I do?!" My voice is rising uncontrollably.

"I told you. Do not worry. The worst that happened was the crushing of the lockers."

"That's- that's all?" I can't prevent the relief flooding into my words.

Danny looks right into my eyes, so I can see the honestly there. "Yes. I am your friend. I do not lie." Then he embraces me.

I bury my face in his shoulder. His arms are strong and sturdy, but his hands are warm, friendly, and loving. I want to thank him, but there isn't a need for any more words.

So I hug him back.

**;-)**

**-FFS**


	10. June

**Hi! ;-) Thank you for the reviews:**

**TheOnyxDragon12: You'll have to wait & see (that should be coming up soon…)**

**BowTies23: Thank you! ;-) I might not be able to update this weekend, but if I can't, then I'll give you an extra chapter or two next week.**

**lego lover 99: Thank you. ;-) … Do you have something against Danny? XD Everybody else is telling me **_**not**_**to kill him XD. Seriously, though, thank you for the idea/input. ;-)**

**WARNING: there are a few instances where some swearing does occur, twice when Nick Fury is yelling (whoops, spoiler).**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man. I DO own my OC Emmaline, the idea, and any poetry.**

**Chapter 10: June**

"_**Perhaps strength doesn't reside in having never been broken,**_

_**But in the COURAGE**_

_**Required to grow strong in the broken places."**_

_**-unknown.**_

_Emma's POV_

Friday is 'graduation'. I don't go to school Tuesday. Nick doesn't say I have to go back, and I really don't want to ever step foot in that school again. Ava comes in on Tuesday night to visit me in the infirmary, and we have a long talk. About friends, about people. She tells me the secret that I can't tell anyone- about how hard it is to control the tiger inside of her, the way the beast within always wants to escape. In the end, she tells me it's my decision whether or not to come to graduation, but she thinks I should 'face my fear'.

So I decide to go, if only to the graduation. I don't feel like I've earned it, but I get my diploma on Friday. I'm on the A Honor Roll, too, even though I don't deserve that either. After the ceremony, I walk away and leave the others to their celebration. I didn't go to school for years, all I did was survive two months of twelfth grade, and I barely managed that. Nick messed around with some paperwork, though, so I guess I had enough credits to make it.

I'm fairly subdued the remainder of the day. Ava's proud of me, though, and I congratulate all my teammates, because they've worked hard for this, and really deserve it. Putting on my happy face for other people- this is new to me. I've never felt the need to pretend that I'm 'happy' for others' sakes, because there never was anybody else to pretend for.

I go to bed early, drained from all of the fake smiles. Waking up Saturday morning, I feel thrilled- I never have to face those other kids back there ever again. They're just people of the past, people that _did_something.

Happily, I get up and shower, finally glancing at the clock. Nine-fifty. Why do I feel as if I should be somewhere? Then I suddenly remember what I've been looking forward to all week- practicing with Danny! I'm supposed to meet him in his room at ten. I dash through the passageways, hoping I won't be late. When I finally reach his bedroom, I knock lightly at his door, patiently waiting for his answer, my heart leaping up to my throat.

"Yes?" I hear Danny answer.

"Um… this is Emma?"

"Oh, come in!" Carefully, I open my door, to see Danny sitting criss–cross on his rug, surrounded by incense.

"Sorry… am I interrupting you…?" I ask hesitantly.

Danny smiles warmly. "No. Do not worry. I was simply waiting."

"Am I late?"

He glances at the clock. "You are precisely two minutes early," he proclaims. On a more serious note, Danny asks, "How are you?"

I smile. "Happy that I don't have to go back there again."

"What are you going to college for?"

The thought that I should go to college hasn't ever occurred to me before now. "I- I haven't really thought about it yet," I admit. "What about you?"

Danny redirects his gaze to the ground. "I do not believe I will be going there." I frown.

"Why not?"

"I have other previously decided affairs planned."

"Oh," I say, not sure how to respond.

Danny looks up at me. "You seem… tired."

"I haven't been getting much sleep," I admit.

"Why not?" He's frowning again now.

"I've just been having this really disturbing dream, lately- every night, really. It's sad…"

"Oh?"

I sigh. "There's this little boy and his mother. It's freezing cold outside, and they're in the mountains somewhere, just the two of them. Then there's this pack of starving wolves and-and… they kill the mother. The little boy's all alone in the mountains, and his mother's torn apart right before his eyes. She scarified herself for him. It's just so sad…" I wring my hands. "The boy was only seven or eight… too young to see something like that. Too young to lose his mother." I swallow hard.

Danny is staring at me, his face ghostly pale. "What- what happened to the boy?" he whispers, his voice hoarse.

"I- I don't know. The dream didn't go that far. The last thing I remember is the wolves dragging her away, staining the snow with her blood. He was really young… I don't know… Danny, what's wrong?" I cry, as he sinks onto the bed.

Danny pushes me away. He seems to be struggling with something. At last, he stands, and takes a deep breathe in, avoiding my eyes. "Emma… how often do you have these dreams?" he asks softly.

I linger over his words, uncertain of where this is going. "Danny, I don't know- I used to have them all the time, this is the first one I've had since I came to S.H.I.E.L.D., I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have said anything, you-"

He cuts me off. "You do not know who this boy is? You do not remember the woman saying anything?"

The dream is still scarily vivid and fresh in my memory, but I shake my head. "It doesn't matter, the dream doesn't matter, I'm sorry-"

"Do your dreams ever come true? Are they ever events that should be locked in the past forever?"

My stomach plummets, and I whisper, "Yes." Just one word, but a word laden with so much meaning. "Danny, I'm so, so sorry, I shouldn't have said anything about it-"

Slowly Danny shakes his head and says, "No. Though some things are better left untouched, old wounds are bound to be reopened until they scar, unless you let them heal, accept them for what they are… It is my weakness, not yours, that is the problem. I am sorry, my friend."

Desperately, I try again. "Look, I don't know why these things happen, they just do, but it's my fault, they happen to me, I should be able to handle them." My voice drops. "Danny, who was that boy?" The tears are already in my eyes, I know what his answer will be, but that doesn't stop me from hating myself when Danny looks straight at me so I can see the hurt in his eyes.

"They both died on the same day. My father was shoved from the clifftop by his dearest friend and business partner, and we both watched helplessly in horror. The thief drove us away, hoping to find the mystical K'un L'un and its riches by himself. Yet it was I who was rescued by the lost city's warriors." Danny's words are so harsh and bitter, conveying his pain. "Tomorrow, the murder will celebrate its tenth anniversary.

"A decade," he continues, "Since I became alone in this world."

**.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M .M.M.M.M.M.M.M.**

That night, Danny isn't at dinner. We don't necessarily eat together, but everybody on the team (except Peter, of course, who lives with his aunt) eats around the same time, so we're usually all at the table together anyways. Ava and Luke notice, I can tell, but Ava sees the look on my face and continues eating, while Luke just raises his eyebrows. Sam, of course, can't be quiet about it.

"Where's the fortune cookie?" he demands obnoxiously.

"Shut up," Ava answers.

"Seriously, though, where's Danny?"

Stubbornly, I say, "He didn't feel like coming to dinner tonight, okay? I'm sure everyone's done that at some point."

"Eh, no, not really," Sam says. "Hope I don't catch whatever sickness he's got."

That's it. Slamming my food on the table, I storm out of the kitchen.

"Now you've done it, buckethead," growls Ava.

"What? What did I do?!"

"You idiot, you're so stuck in your own little world-!"

I don't stick around to hear the rest of the angry exchange, just walking to my bedroom and collapsing miserably on the bed, and staring at the ceiling until the darkness consumes me and I fall into some terrible state that could be considered 'sleep', for lack of a better term.

**.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M .M.M.M.M.M.M.M.**

Morning. Miserable morning. Why should I even get up? Oh, yeah. _Because there's training today and Nick will kick my butt if I'm not there on time, I've caused enough trouble this week as it is._ Hey, it's June first! New month- I can start going on missions!

When I finally get to the training room, I realize that the only other person here is Peter. It's an awkward wait, since all Peter does is throw dirty looks in my direction every so often, and there's no way that I'm going to talk to him, so I just stand there, utterly mute, fidgeting with some stray strands of hair.

The session itself is actually really easy. Danny doesn't show up the whole time, but nobody expected him to. As I'm leaving the arena, I see Nick waiting for me. "Come with me, Carlson."

In his office, Nick sits down in his chair, inviting me to take a seat across from him. Once I'm sitting, he starts talking. "Look kid, I don't know what the f*ck happened to you at that school, but you've got some explaining to do. I'd ask Rand, but after your _talk_ yesterday and the anniversary being today, he's in no condition to talk to me."

I falter. "I- look, Nick, I get it! I lost control, okay?! There wasn't anything I could do, it was your stupid idea to send me to school as 'cover' anyways, like anybody else cared about my existence!"

"Other b*tches have been tracking you. You of all people should realize that you are a very valuable asset and somebody that no one wants as an enemy."

"You're talking as though I'm some great prize or something! I can't control myself even when I want to, why on earth would anybody want to be anywhere near me? Only an insane person like you would even consider it!"

"I'm not the only person who has taken you in. That's obvious. You've left behind a little trail of horror stories wherever you've stayed, and it's not too hard to get the truth out of these people. I'm in contact with Professor Xavier, kid."

I clap my hands over my ears. "DON'T SAY THAT NAME AGAIN! They couldn't help me, I can remember that much!"

"Kid- that's _all_ that you remember."

"SO WHAT?!" I scream. "What if I don't WANT to remember those people anymore?! I don't want this to happen to me, Nick!"

"Suck it up, kid. You're not the only one who's lost their childhood."

"YOU CAN'T LOSE WHAT YOU NEVER HAD, AND I NEVER HAD A CHILDHOOD, NICK!"

"Calm down, already. You need to learn to control that temper. You're very defensive you know, you haven't given many people the chance to get to know you. Never had time to make friends?"

"TIME?! Nick, all I've ever had was the rush to keep myself from blowing everything up. I can barely make one 'friend', let alone keep him!"

Nick's face softens. "Look, Em, it's normal for-"

"NORMAL?!" I screech back. "I wish!"

He sighs, then says, "Now, you look. I can't help unless you let me." I quiet down, still bristling. "There. I get it, your life has sucked, okay? Kid, we all have ups and downs. You just gotta be a hero and quit threatening to blow this place up.

"You've had quite the life. Now, I need to know: what did you do back at the school?"

"Nick, I can't remember. There was just a bunch of energy, then a bubble, and I woke up in your infirmary. I don't remember losing control, just like I don't remember half my life."

Nick looks at me, as if to determine to what extent that I'm lying. "Fine. What did you do to Rand to get him so worked up?"

I cross my arms. "None of your business. You know his parents died today, but I'm sure he hasn't told you how?! Yeah, then just lay off!"

His eyes bulge angrily, but Nick knows there's no use in trying to reason with me. "Fine. So you won't answer any of my questions.

"I get that you're afraid of your mutation. You have to start using it in training, now, though. You can't hold off forever, and you don't even know your potential."

I know my potential just fine, thank you very much. Not that I can tell him that. Then he'd realize just what use I could be.

"Okay, then. Bye." I walk away, and I would have slammed the door, except it's the sliding kind that automatically open and shut if you're the right person.

I shouldn't have walked out on him, but I'm beyond caring. I've made Nick so mad at me anyways that it won't matter what I do now, unless I listen to his orders and use my 'power'- fine. I'll give him just what he asked for at training tomorrow.

Something tells me I'm going to regret this.

**.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M .M.M.M.M.M.M.M.**

Training on Monday. My biggest S.H.I.E.L.D. failure yet.

I shut down the whole stupid room. The program started, and everyone was there. Peter yelled at me to take out the control panel, since computers have this knack of either malfunctioning at my touch or doing what I wanted without me even pressing any more buttons.

This time, though, I tried to use my mutation to remove the power from the robots and shut them down. Apparently whatever I did was overkill, because the whole system just turned off, even the lights, so we were immersed in darkness, listening to Coulson swear at the microphone (which wasn't working either, but the vents carry sound very well).

Nick didn't call me to his office, though, so I guess that I did okay. Considering that this is me we're talking about.

Now I'm just messing around in my bedroom. Nick won't let me go to the library, so I don't have much to do. I stayed with Danny for a few hours on Saturday after I told him about the dream, not saying much, but just keeping him company. He's not mad, just sad, full of memories that he's pushed away all year. I hear knocking at my door. Sighing, I get up and open it. There is Ava standing in front of me. "Fury wants us to discuss battle tactics one more time with you, since you're going on missions from now on."

Everybody is in the 'meeting' room, waiting. The battle tactics aren't very interesting, but I should be glad that Nick's still letting me go. Suddenly, the door opens, and I immediately guess that Nick has changed his mind. There's one problem, though. This guy isn't Nick.

"Deadpool," Peter mutters. I can't see underneath his mask, but I can tell from his tone that he's angry.

"Miss me?" the guy laughs insanely.

Ava growls in her throat. Sam gapes, and Luke clenches his fists. Danny face-palms himself.

"What're you doing here?!" Peter says loudly, demanding an answer. "Stealing information from S.H.I.E.L.D. computers again? I don't think so!"

The guy- Deadpool?- cackles madly again, then responds, "Oh, no, my dear arachnid friend. I already pooled you! No, no, I've come for somebody else, another, better prize."

Then he swoops behind me, and yanks my head back, pressing the cold blade of a knife to my throat.

**How's that? Not bad for 12:11 at night, right?**

**-FFS**


	11. Boom

**Hi! Thank you for the reviews:**

**leggo lover 99: XD understood. **

**BowTies23: Aw, thanks! =) I sincerely hope that this fic just keeps getting awesomer and awesomer (yeah, I know that 'awesomer' isn't a word and that I should use 'more awesome', but 'awesomer' sounds way awesomer.)**

**DISCALIMER: I only own my OC Emmaline Carlson, the idea, & any poetry. I do not own the quote(s) or Ultimate Spider-Man (because if I owned Ultimate Spider-Man, then Danny would be featured much more often.)**

**Chapter 11: Boom.**

"_**Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives.**_

_**I think we're being run by maniacs for maniacal ends **_

_**and I think I'm liable to be put away as insane for expressing that.**_

_**That's what's insane about it."**_

_**-John Lennon**_

Deadpool laughs maniacally. "Now, you're worth a very fine sum."

I choke helplessly. "Maybe," I manage, "_maybe_ I'm not who you think I am."

"Doesn't matter! You fit the description! 'Long braided brown hair', check, 'tattoo', check, 'attitude', check, 'glasses'- no! No! Not check! Where did you put your glasses?!" he screeches, then breaks into a fit of hysterical laughter. "Ha! You're smart, just like my employer said you'd be!"

"Who exactly _is_ your employer _this_ time?" Ava growls. She is standing, claws unsheathed. Luke's fists are clenched, and he is right behind her. Sam's still leaning back in his chair, apparently unconcerned. Danny is standing the farthest back, his two fists aglow. Peter's obviously angry, and very alarmed (I do have a knife pressed to my throat, after all). They all know this Deadpool, but I haven't ever heard of him.

"Oh, dear! I'm afraid that I cannot tell you," and he sniffles, tightening his grip on my head. "Now one move from this mutant's boyfriend over there, or her little BFF's, even from the arachnid- she's deader than my pool. You can't touch me, either- you all know about my healing factor, so you can't just shoot me in the back. Ahem. Let's get a closer look at this beauty, here," he laughs, spinning me around to face him, about to remove my mask.

Angrily, I seize my opportunity, and kick him right between the legs. He instantly kneels down, saying, "Ouchie ouchie ouchie," and wincing beneath his costume. I dash over to the other side of the room, jumping into a fighting stance. "That wasn't fair!" Deadpool whines at me.

"Who is this guy?" I mutter to Ava.

"Deadpool. He used to train with us, now he's a mercenary," she growls back.

"Hey! That's a bit prejudicial, isn't it? I'm not _necessarily_ here to k-word her! My employer just wants her body, and she _can_ be alive?"

"K-word?" I wonder aloud.

Peter answers my question. "_Deadpool_ here isn't willing to own up to murder- can't even admit that he's _killing_ people!"

Deadpool claps his hands over his ears. "Puh-lease! You know I don't like the k-word, so- shut up before I k-word _you_."

"This guy's insane," I realize.

He bows. "Thank you, thank you! Now, we have some decisions to make. Oh, so many choices!" Deadpool exclaims, rubbing his hands together. "You can either come peacefully, or-" his voice deadens, "-or I attempt to blow this whole aircraft up! Or rather, down! Either way, I win," he sums up cheerfully, gesturing toward the beeping devices that we have failed to notice. They're spread out all over the ceiling and walls, and I assume throughout the Helicarrier. Dramatically, Deadpool takes a remote control with a huge red button on it out of his pocket.

"Crap," Luke says.

"Oh, shit," Ava and Sam say in unison.

"Crud, oh, crud," Peter mutters.

Then, to my absolute horror, my teammates step forward. "No, she's not-"

"Yes," I interrupt, "Fine. Here I come." Deadpool laughs crazily, and leads me away, his finger lingering over the button. I ignore my teammates shocked expressions, and their protests, because I know Deadpool's for real.

"Ta ta, until next time!" With a flourish, he brings me into a _Stark Industries_ aircraft, carefully strapping me in the seat. "And in case you get any ideas, I _will_ still press this button." I don't doubt him. This guy's capable of murder, he's capable of anything, including blowing up the Helicarrier.

"Ah, off to Dr. Doom's!" Deadpool continues. His mindless talk washes over me, as I struggle to come up with any ideas. I glare at him. No way. No one threatens my family, no one kidnaps me for _money_. My fury swells inside me, building slowly.

Suddenly, the aircraft lurches to the side. The screen falters, then flickers out, and the engine dies. There's no more energy for it to run on- it's all within me now. "HEY!" Deadpool screeches, and jams his finger against the red button.

"NO!" I shout in horror, waiting for the explosion, then realize that the remote control, like everything, needs energy. If I wasn't so tense, I'd laugh with relief. My anger rises up again, though, like an enormous tidal wave washing over me. Steam pours from the controls, and Deadpool kicks open the hatch, jumping from the aircraft and hollering to the sky about his money, his victory, as he opens his parachute and floats slowly down.

Last straw. I let go for the first time in my life, as I see red.

**M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M. M.M.M.M.M.**

_Ava's POV_

We watch in horror as the aircraft explodes with a force that I've never seen before. The sky is clouded with smoke, and we can't see anything except a few more flashes of light, a terrible scream, and the sound of more tiny explosions.

Deadpool's alive, no doubt. He's right about his healing power; it really is strong.

Emma's dead, though. Dead.

I've had family die before, but not a friend. She really was a good person. A kind person. She was so shy...

How can I already be dwelling on memories, when she only just died?

Nova is staring out the window, a look of horror upon his face, like he hadn't really believed this could happen. Fury had warned us that this girl was unstable, that she had struggled with death all of her life. But he had also tried to tell us that her power was deadly, but as a person, she was obsessed with making sure everybody else lived. That she didn't hurt any of us. I had positively scoffed when he said we had a lot to learn from her.

Power-Man is right beside Nova, looking numb. He didn't care for Emma, but she was still his teammate, and Luke takes these things right to heart.

Spider-Man. Pete. His mask is crumpled in his hand, and his face is scrunched up in such an angry expression that I don't approach him. He's the team leader. He feels responsible for this girl, this girl that she hated.

Iron Fist is gone. He punched a hole in the wall and left, sirens blaring behind him.

And I'm angry. So, so angry. Deadpool was one of us- he was apart of the team. He comes back, usually with trouble, but this- _killing_ one of our own- this is too far. Deadpool needs to pay for what he's done.

So I vow that when I see him next, I kill him. Once he heals, I'll kill him again. And again. Until he feels guilt gnawing him from the inside out, like a rotten apple.

**M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M. M.M.M.M.M.**

I wake up in the middle of the night, woken by the realization that of course Emma's alive! I dash to Danny's room, screaming, "She's here! She's alive!"

When Danny opens the door, he looks the worst I've seen him since he was in Emma's apartment, dying. That's saying something. He's wearing his uniform, without his bandana, and his eyes are widened at my noise.

"What do you mean, Ava?" Danny sounds so worn down, so exhausted, completely hopeless.

"I mean that she's here, she's alive! That stupid necklace she wears all the time, it would've brought her back to the Tricarrier!"

Danny's face remains the same as before. Slowly, he brings his hand up, and opens his fist. There, in his palm, is Emma's necklace.

"But- but why? Why do you have it?! She wore it all the time, you said!"

His voice is bitter, filled with hate and regret. "She gave it to me on Saturday. When she found my weak spot, and tried to comfort me. Before she left, she handed me this and told me to keep it until I found where I belong again. It's my fault she's dead."

"Oh, no, Danny, no..." I whisper in horror, feeling like a complete idiot.

"It is my fault, Ava. She trusted me. And I have let her down."

Emmaline's dead. Nothing can change that now.

**M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M. M.M.M.M.M.**

The next morning. Danny doesn't show up at breakfast, and neither does Peter.

Fury tells us that they're going to search the crash site once they're sure it's stable, and won't blow anybody up. We can come if we want. There'll be a memorial service for her on Saturday.

Fuck.

**;-) I may have the next chapter up tonight.**

**-FFS**


	12. Blow Off Those Dusty Shelves

**Hi again! Looks like I have some time to write today after all- yay! :-D :-D Please review this chapter, dear readers, I ****_do_****keep an eye on the traffic graph, and there are many of you reading, but not reviewing! Please?!**

**BowTies23: Thank you thank you for the review! ;-D 'Funsomer'- I like the sound of that! ;-D**

**leggo lover 99: Thank you thank you for your review! I'm trying, I'm trying! Hopefully there will be an update EVERY DAY, and if I ever cheat you guys out of a chapter, I'll do two the next day!**

**DISCLAIMER: I only own my (dead) OC Emmaline, the idea, & any poetry! I unfortunately to NOT own the quotes, or Ultimate Spider-Man (again, there would be much more ****_Danny_****in the show if I did!).**

**Chapter 12: Blow Off Those Dusty Shelves.**

"_**The most painful goodbyes are the ones**_

_**that are never said **_

_**and never explained."**_

_**-Unknown**_

_Danny's POV_

By Sunday, the crash site still is not stable. I do not bother finding out if the memorial service is canceled or not, though, because I am not going either way. I cannot bear to face my teammates and have to explain that she would still be alive if it was not for me. I am so weak, this is all my fault. It has been so long, I should be used to the fact that my parents are dead, and not be affected so drastically. If it was not for this weakness, she would not have felt obligated to give me her necklace with those kind words and she would be here, in the Tricarrier, safe.

I still can hardly believe that she wanted to be my friend, that she saved my life. She was so unique, utterly innocent. She had seen how ugly the world can be, but yet managed to turn her back on it all and gave the world the best she had. Courage- she had true spirit.

She understood me like none outside of K'un L'un have before. No one has ever tried to understand my strange ways before. She knew already.

I cannot forget the kind, innocent beauty her face held. She seemed so small and delicate, with her carefully carved features that resembled a doll's. Despite her burdens, she had such a youthful spirit, an unforgettable smile that is eternally engraved in my memory. Her laugh was always genuine, for she saw no reason to lie, and truth and love were all she had ever sought in her path to understanding.

And her blood is on my hands.

She saved my life, and I let her die before my very eyes. Some things the universe can never forget, and this will be one of them. Already, I can see how ashamed the monks will be, but they cannot regret this more than I do.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

_Ava's POV_

We didn't end up holding the memorial service, because we hadn't been able to search the crash site for the body.

Everybody's so down. It's not like most of them bothered to get to know Emma very well, but I think they just regret not helping her. Since it's obvious that nobody ever helped her out, and we're supposed to be the superheroes who saved her, make her apart of this crazy S.H.I.E.L.D. family, and we didn't.

I haven't seen Danny at all; I don't think he's left his room at all, not even to eat. Fury's left him alone so far, but today, Monday, he's going to make Danny get up and eat, shower, that kind of thing. Danny's the kind of person who keeps quiet about himself, though, and doesn't like to draw attention to himself, he'll likely go through the motions of everyday life, silently suffering to himself.

Peter's subdued, but he's back to making his lame jokes, so he's actually okay. Even if he might feel a little guilty, he isn't letting it effect his everyday life. It's pretty much the same thing with Sam, who's now fighting with Peter again, albeit halfheartedly. I think Luke feels bad for the way he ignored Emma, but otherwise, he doesn't blame himself for her death the way the rest of us do.

Me? I've been keeping busy. Looking through lists of colleges to use as 'cover' while I continue with the whole superhero thing, because even though I've considered going solo after graduating, my team's my family, and I can't leave them. Not the way I hung Emmaline out to dry back there. I'm never watching one of my friends die like that again- _never_.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

_Annabel Johnson, (random) S.H.I.E.L.D. officer _

It's Monday morning, and Crash Site M3 in area 7y is safe to investigate. The dust has finally cleared enough to see, and the scientists have cleared it stable enough to visit.

When we land, though, I'm surprised. Being an officer for several years now, I've learned not to be surprised on the job, but for a crash site, there's not a whole lot of debris. There is, however, an enormous pit with a glowing bubble surrounding it.

After numerous tries, we find that the 'bubble' cannot be breached, and report back to Director Fury. He is angry that we attempted to breach the bubble at all, and calls off the search, commanding the top scientists to investigate the 'bubble', which turns out to be an energy shield. That's all I find out before Director Fury tells me to go fetch Power Man, White Tiger, Nova, Spider-Man, and Iron Fist immediately and tell them that he needs them _now_.

Power Man, Nova, and Spider-Man are having a competition to see who can hold their breath the longest in the kitchen. "Kids," I mutter to myself before interrupting their game. "Ahem. Director Fury requests your presence immediately."

"Why?" Nova shoots back at me.

"Because he says so, and if I were you, I'd hurry up," I warn them, and they rush off, yanking on various pieces of their uniforms as they run off, cursing.

White Tiger is in her bedroom, and obediently agrees to come as soon as I've told her about Director Fury requesting her. Now.

Iron Fist is harder. He is also in his bedroom, but he flat out refuses to answer me, let alone come. Finally, I resign to telling him there is a new development in the investigation of the crash site, which makes him instantly jump from his bed and dash out of site. I chuckle to myself as I report to Room H56 for lunch.

Kids.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

_Ava's POV_

Questions run through my mind as I skid to a halt in front of Fury. He nods at me, and I step into line beside Spider-Man, Power Man, and Nova, who are quiet for once. After another ten minutes or so, Iron Fist steps into place next to me. I'm utterly shocked that he came, but I guess that he's starting to forgive himself and feel better finally.

Fury clears his throat. "There has been a 'force field' discovered around a pit in the center of the crash site. I'm slightly... concerned about what may or may not be inside of that field, which, incidentally happens to be composed of _energy_, and felt it best to have you kids investigate it. Not to mention that my agents can't figure out to get past it."

Half an hour later, we're at the crash site. It's basically a patch of dirt in the countryside just beyond NYC, with a blue bubble spanning over a large pit. The bubble is what I assume to be the force field Fury was telling us about.

Iron Fist is completely silent as we walk towards the bubble, his face expressionless. Nova and Spidey have some sort of argument going between them, but as we get closer to the bubble, I hiss, "Shut up, you idiots. I can hear something!"

It's a faint buzzing sound, the same as when Emmaline lost control at school. The bubble is completely opaque. Bucket head picks up a stone and lightly tosses it at the field, and it ricochets right back at him, landing in the ground right next to Power Man, sinking a foot deep. "Woa..." Power Man seems to decide against coming any closer.

"Nova, try shooting a beam at it," Spidey instructs, and Nova listens. The beam just makes the field glow brighter, and look even more solid, though, so Nova quickly stops. "Power Man, try punching it!"

"No way am I putting a finger on that thing!" he exclaims.

We stand there, out of ideas. "Hey, Iron Fist, try punching it with your fist!" Nova says, jumping up in excitement.

Iron Fist ignores him. "Come on, you can't not talk forever!" Web-Head tells him. He turns and looks at Spidey as if to say, _Challenge accepted._

"Iron Fist, just give it a try! We don't have any better ideas at this point!" I say, exasperated. He stands there staring at the bubble for what feels like an eternity, then he gives a mighty shout, and takes off running at the shield, his fist aflame, and smashes his fist against it. Instead of his fist seeming to meet a wall like the pebble did, his whole arm begins sinking into the bubble, until he's gone. We stare, our mouths open.

What the-?

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

**So? What do you think?!**

**;-) Sorry if it's short, tomorrow's chapter will be really long (I might even split it into two parts and upload one tonight and the other tomorrow if I feel like writing more).**

**-FFS**


	13. Starting Over Again

**Hello! **

**BowTies23: Thank you for the review! :-) Cliffhangers- my specialty (an admittedly evil one, at that).**

**Hamster1000: Thank you sis! (Could you please stop bugging me when I'm trying to work from now on, though, if you're so eager to read more?!) =)**

**DISCLAIMER: I only own the idea, and my OC Emmaline, plus any poetry. I do not own the quotes, nor Ultimate Spider-Man (has anybody seen the one that they aired yesterday other than me?).**

**Chapter 13: Starting Over Again**

_"Now we're back to the beginning_

_It's just a feeling and no one knows yet_

_But just because they can't feel it too_

_Doesn't mean that you have to forget_

_Let your memories grow stronger and stronger_

_Until they're before your eyes_

_You'll come back_

_When they call you_

_No need to say goodbye."_

_-Regina Spektor, 'The Call'_

Where am I? All I remember is being really, really angry at Deadpool, and then the aircraft exploded. Danny's here, though. That's why I woke up again.

I stand up, dusting the dirt off of my uniform. "Danny?" I say.

"What-" he gasps. Here inside of my energy bubble, it's warm and bright, kind of like we're on the inside of an enormous sphere. The bubble emits light, immersing us in shades of blue. Danny looks… _terrible_. His blonde hair is tangled, and his clothes look as if he's been sleeping in them- for a week. Those beautiful green eyes look so tired, and he has dark circles underneath his eyes. "You're… you're _dead_," Danny says in complete disbelief.

I look at him. Wait, S.H.I.E.L.D. thinks that I'm dead? They think I killed myself when I made the aircraft explode? "Not really. At least, I didn't think that I was dead…"

"What- what happened? How are you alive? You are _alive_…" he stammers.

I shrug. "I guess I created an energy bubble when I made the aircraft explode…"

"_You_ made it explode?"

"Well, yeah, I was kind of angry at the time- stupid Deadpool, trying to kidnap me, like I'd let them take me that easily, like I haven't been running from them for years, I've had plenty of experience with mercenaries before, why would Deadpool be any different? Wait… you guys thought I'd died? In the aircraft? Oh, gosh… Deadpool was supposed to think I'd died, not _you_. I'm sorry…" I feel stupid as I attempt to apologize and explain at the same time.

"You are sorry?" Danny answers faintly, suddenly sitting down on the ground.

"Are- are you okay?" I ask him, taking a seat next to him.

"No, not really," he says, making me smile at him.

"Really, I am sorry that you thought that. I just was asleep, I guess- that took a lot of energy… you woke me up when you knocked."

Danny stares at me. "Knocked? I hit your 'bubble' with my iron fist!"

"Oh… sorry about that too…" I trail off uncomfortably. "Hey… would you mind not telling Nick about this whole thing? 'Cause if he finds out, he's going to make me start using my powers way more than I do now, and that's something I'd seriously like to avoid- I'm not so great with controlling it, I can pretty much manage to make a bubble or have stuff explode, that's all I've tried doing when I practice alone-"

"Good luck trying," Danny shakes his head. "You are marked as _dead_ according to the government-"

"-I have been for years, if you look in public records I 'died' when I was six-"

"-and everyone is still under that impression. There was a memorial service scheduled for Sunday, but the officers had not cleared it safe to search for your body, and we wanted to be certain that we could not hold a funeral-"

"Funeral?" I interrupt. "Oh no…" I sigh to myself. "I really am sorry, I just didn't wake up until you tried breaking my bubble, and I've been asleep this whole time…" On a sudden whim, I wrap my arms around Danny, who for a moment is stiff, then hugs me back, so tightly that I can't breathe.

"Perhaps we should get back to our teammates…" he whispers in my ear, and we let go.

"I'm not very good at getting rid of these things," I warn, as I attempt to bring the energy back into me, struggling with the amount and intensity- there's enough energy here for dozens of people; explosions make more energy, and I harnessed that power into this.

I can't get rid of it, though. It's too much to hold in. I'm buzzing already, and the bubble's only just starting to thin. Danny walks up to me and puts a hand on my bare shoulder, though, and I feel it all wash away in a wave of calm, dissipating into the world around me. Slowly, the dome of energy fades away, until I'm kneeling in the middle of an enormous pit, beside Danny, in the rain.

Our teammates are standing there, open-mouthed. I feel dizzy, though, and my vision is starting to fuzz over. I fall to my side, into what should have been mud, but strong arms lift me up and carry me instead, and I curl up into Danny's warm, safe arms, burying my face into his chest.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))**

_1 week later…_

Ava, Luke, Sam, and Peter didn't believe that it was me, alive. I felt that I owed them an explanation, and told them about the energy bubble that I made- except that I told them that I did it instinctively, not on purpose, which was a lie. When I told Nick that story, though, he didn't believe me, and ordered me to tell him the _whole_ truth, so I did. (I was right; Nick says he expects me to use my mutation whenever I go on missions from now on.)

I stayed in my bedroom for a day, but then things went back to normal. I've gone on two missions so far, and they went really well. They were just basic 'petty' criminals like the Leaper, but I actually enjoyed helping out. It felt good and right to be doing something for other people.

Today's another training session. We've been having them twice a day lately, simply because Nick thinks we have 'too much free time'. I've been sleeping better at night, now, because I'm so exhausted after the second training session, though I've had Memory Dreams every night.

When we get there, Nick tells us to divide into two teams. He assigns Ava and Peter as the team captains. I end up with Ava and Sam, while Peter chooses Luke and Danny. We end up racing throughout a course, except that neither team ends up winning; there are 'traps' throughout it, and nobody makes it far enough to even get close to the finish line.

Sam, typically, gets caught right away by a giant magnet that his helmet gets stuck to. Peter's next; he steps on some sort of button, which traps him in a box. I end up getting tied to the ceiling by Peter's web shooters, which start malfunctioning just before he gets trapped. Ava gets stuck in an enormous pit of water filled with robots that are trying to murder her, and Danny gets trapped by this goo-monster thing that looks like grape jelly. Luke is knocked to a wall by a giant robot and doesn't get back up in time.

I stay afterwards with Danny to ask him with help on my Taekwondo training, because I need help with my spinning hook kick. Carefully, Danny grasps my leg and shows me how to hold my foot, readjusting me. The whole time, we talk, and Danny makes me laugh. We walk out giggling together, and Danny suddenly kisses me in the corridor outside.

Oh- those lips! I kiss him back, and the butterflies are going crazy, the moment lasting for a blissful eternity yet only a mere second; when we finally break free, Danny looks away, embarrassed.

"I- I am sorry. I should not have done that."

"No! Thank you, Danny," I whisper.

"You are okay with it?"

I'm blushing now, but I've never felt so happy. "I- I- Danny, thank you for the kiss, it was wonderful..."

Danny's eyes light up, and we lean in to kiss again, our lips just brushing when Sam lets out a yelp from the corner. We back away, with both of us blushing furiously.

"What- what are you doing?!"

I stammer, "Nothing Sam! Just- just- I have to go, bye, sorry Danny!" I dash down the hallway, not looking back. Typically, I run right into Ava, who sees my reddened face and is instantly suspicious.

"Hey, Em! Watch where you're- what's wrong with _you_?" she demands.

"No- nothing, Ava! Got to go!" I say, trying to run around her, but Ava catches my arm.

"Hey, what's wrong?! Seriously, you can tell me, I won't breathe a word to anybody," Ava says.

I blush again, then whisper, "I'll tell you later, Ava, I'm trying to avoid Sam right now!" I break free, and dash away to my bedroom.

The next morning, Danny and I avoid meeting each other's eyes during breakfast. We both arrive early, and gulp our food down, so that we're gone long before Sam is even awake. During training, though, he's impossible to stay away from.

I stay far enough way that I can't hear what he's muttering to Luke, but I know what he's saying anyways, from the way Luke glances from me to Danny and back again. Ava looks at me, but I can't tell what she's thinking because of her mask.

Peter joins in on Sam's conversation with Luke, and the surprise is apparent on his face. For the first time, I hate that my mask only covers the top half of my face; I know that I'm blushing. Danny is attempting to converse with Ava, but she's not paying much attention, and even she can tell that he's uncomfortable. By now, I'm certain that Ava has guessed what happened yesterday.

The training session is extraordinarily awkward, especially when Coulson (oblivious to Sam's whispering) makes Danny and I partners. As we avoid the robots and smash whatever comes at us, Danny mutters to me, "Would you like to get out of the Tricarrier for a little while this weekend?"

My heart leaps up, and I nod as I touch a robot, absentmindedly absorbing the energy. Danny grins back at me.

"How about we leave for some dinner on Friday night?"

I can't stop the smile from spreading across my face, and the butterflies go crazy. "What time?" I ask shyly as I touch another robot.

Danny, punching one of the machines, says, "Well… I was thinking we could leave at six?"

"Sure!" I say, trying to contain my excitement, absorbing the energy from some sort of trap. The lights go out, and I hear Ava groan. "Oops…"

"CARLSON!" I hear Coulson roar from inside of the control room as he bangs his fist on the computer. "NOT AGAIN!"

"You should probably go," Danny warns. I nod, dashing out of the room, still thrilled for Friday to come, even though it's only Tuesday.

Ava catches up to me as I hurry through the hallways. "Em! Wait up!" I slow down and let her match my pace, still unbelievably excited. "Did you _really _kiss Danny?" she hisses at me.

"He kissed me, actually," I say, grinning happily to myself as I skip toward my bedroom. Ava gapes at me.

"_Seriously_?! Wow…" Ava shakes her head. "Just- wow… I mean, Danny's not, you know- oh, wow."

I grin at my friend. "Ava… I need your help… please?"

Ava frowns at me. "With what?"

"Once we're in my room, I'll tell you," I say, and we hurry over to my bedroom. When the door is safely shut, I tell her in a hushed voice about Friday, and Ava's eyebrows shoot up.

"Wow. You said _yes_? To a _date_?"

I feel my face go red. "It's not- oh, fine, I guess it is," I shuffle my feet, grinning stupidly at the floor. "And, I know this sounds stupid, but…" my voice drops to a whisper, "…but I don't know what to _wear_. And you're the only other girl… I've never been on a date before…"

Ava shakes her head at me, but she's smiling. "Jeez, do _I_ look like I know much about dating?"

"Um… yeah," I admit.

She rolls her eyes. "Okay, whatever, but… what do you have to wear?"

I show her my nicest clothing; that is, a few shirts that aren't stained, pilly, or too small. Ava shakes her head at me.

"You really need to go shopping," she tells me. "Come _on_, we're leaving." Ava drags me out of my room, towards the exit.

I sputter, "Wait? Now? As in, _now_ now?"

"Yes," Ava says. As we pass Sam and Peter arguing, they turn and stare at us as we walk away. "Jeez! Don't let _us_ bother your bickering!" she throws over her shoulder as we leave.

A half hour later, we're in the middle of New York City, surrounded by clothing stores. All of them are full to the brim with what looks like fashionable stuff. Ava drags me into the nearest store, and brings me to the dressing room, throwing clothes in for me to try on. The majority of the clothes are tightly fit, and very short. Ava critically examines them, then chucks them either into the 'buy' pile or the 'no way' pile. I watch, amazed, as the 'buy' pile slowly grows higher and higher, until Ava tells me it's time to check out.

We go through a few more stores like this, until Ava says that I have enough clothes to get me by, for now. It was fun doing something with her, and I didn't think Ava would be this good at shopping and, well, those sorts of things. Truthfully, though, she picked out some nice stuff, even if most of it wasn't anything I would have ever bought otherwise (after all, I would never have entered those stores, if it wasn't for Ava).

Back at the Tricarrier, Ava helps me put everything away (and throw out some ragged old junk). Out with the old and in with the new, as the saying goes. Then we go through everything until Ava pronounces the outfit for Friday as 'perfect'. I grin at her, thanking her over and over, but Ava just waves me off and makes me promise not to tell the boys.

The rest of the week drags by. I'm really excited for Friday. My teammates are starting to drive me a little crazy- everybody sees so much of each other, we can't help but get on each other's nerves. Sam hasn't said anything about what he saw, and I think Ava's made him promise not to; he cringes whenever she enters the room.

On Friday morning, I wake up at four in the morning. I can't get back to sleep because I'm too excited, so I take a long shower. When I say long shower, I mean a good half hour shower, maybe even longer.

There isn't any training today (Coulson's at a school board meeting), so I try to pass the time with a book, but the minutes snail by. I could swear that somebody is purposefully slowing the hours into seconds, so that every time I glance at the clock, only a few seconds have passed. At nine, I eat breakfast. (I don't dare to eat earlier and risk running into any of my teammates.)

I attempt to practice my Taekwondo form, but my heart isn't in it, and my movements are stiff, because I can't seem to concentrate. Next I try doing yoga, but that doesn't work either. I can't seem to concentrate on even the simplest things.

At last, it's five o'clock. I start trying to get dressed. First I try on my clothes, which fit quite well. It's a dress, which is completely the opposite of what I'd usually wear, but Ava says that I look beautiful in it. The neck scoops down, leaving my shoulders bare, but doesn't show any cleavage (thank goodness). It is light and flowing, and goes down to my knees. The dress is short-sleeved so you can't see my tattoo, and I like the creamy shade of blue.

I squash my feet into black flats. I don't put on any jewelry, but I do attempt to apply some makeup that I bought when I was with Ava. The blush won't cooperate, but the lip-gloss looks nice. I manage to get some black eyeliner on, too. The eye-shadow looks too daunting, so I let that be. I slip off my glasses and put my contacts in, instead.

Finally, I try to figure out what to do with my hair. I feel stupid for thinking about all these things, but I can't help it. At last, I unbraid it, letting it fall past my waist in its typical waves. Knowing that I'll be late if I don't hurry, I hastily brush it, and then rush to the kitchen.

However, Luke's already sitting at the table, eating a hamburger. He turns around, and his eyes widen in surprise. "_Emmaline_?" he says in disbelief. I stare at the floor, embarrassed, and decide that Danny will probably still be able to find me if I wait in the living room (which is connected to the kitchen).

After another few minutes, Danny walks in. The butterflies are going completely insane, and I'm nervous, for some reason. He's wearing a nice white polo and khakis, and when he sees me, Danny's eyes practically pop out of their sockets. "Hello, Emma," he greets me warmly, quickly regaining his calm aura.

I smile back at him. "Hi, Danny."

The whole way to the city, we're quiet. Danny is his normal quiet, the way he usually is, but I really don't know what to say. I'm just happy.

We walk down the busy sidewalk, and I feel my hand slip into his. "Where would you like to eat?" Danny softly asks me, my hair blowing gently in the wind.

"Wherever you want to," I smile back.

"I know a vegetarian place on 12th street?" he offers, and I nod, happily enjoying his company. Once we've arrived at the restaurant, _Angelica Kitchen_, and our orders have been taken, we start talking. It feels so good to have a friend to talk to, to spend time with.

We talk about life in general back home. Because that's what the Tricarrier has become to us; home. Together, we laugh over Peter's and Sam's pranks on each other, and all the various things that have happened over the past few months.

Soon we reach heavier topics, though. It doesn't matter; I can tell Danny anything. When I trust somebody, I give them my heart to hold. We talk about our powers, arousing more laughter. The topic of our pasts is carefully avoided; some things are too dark to discuss over dinner.

The food is delicious, but I hardly notice, I'm so enthralled with Danny. His eyes sparkle whenever he smiles or laughs, which he does often. He's so free right now, just talking about everything that's happening, instead of trying to always keep his composure and be the mature Iron Fist.

Danny insists on paying for the food. After dinner, we walk aimlessly for a while, laughing together. He offers to bring me to the new nature documentary at the theatre, and together we watch it. My hand slips back into his again halfway through the movie, and when the elephant dies at the end, I can't help but crying even though it's just a movie, because I know it really happened (this is a documentary, after all).

By the time the movie ends, it's nine. We walk through Central Park together, discussing the film. Eventually Danny and I sit down beside each other on a bench, just watching the world around us, silently. It's the most beautiful night I've ever seen, and this is the happiest I've ever felt before. I turn to say something to Danny, to find he's already looking at me. We get closer and closer until our lips meet, and we're kissing again, lost in the glory of the moment, until we break apart, laughing.

We agree that it's probably time to get back home, and as we stroll to the Tricarrier, I can't believe how happy I feel inside. The butterflies have disappeared, and are replaced by a warm, burning flame inside my heart.

Outside the door to my bedroom, Danny whispers me goodnight, and I kiss him goodbye. Except it's not really goodbye; it's "Hello until next time". Before he leaves me, though, he quietly asks if I'd like to do this again Wednesday, obviously embarrassed. Grinning, I tell him that of course I'd love to, and he walks away, grinning happily to himself.

As I collapse onto my bed, already nearly asleep, my heart is soaring and I sleepily wonder if Danny knows that I'm grinning to myself too.

**How was it? Sorry if it was too sappy after all the intense chapters, but I felt like I needed to write something lighthearted and happy. J I spent like 5 or 6 hours on this chapter, so I really hope that it's decent.**

**-FFS**


	14. Dreams

**Hi! Thank you for the reviews:**

**TheOnyxDragon12: (Me, I hate Twilight, but anyways-) Thank you for the pointers. ;-)**

**BowTies23: XD I'm glad you liked it! I'm not sure if I was too descriptive or not descriptive enough... what do you think?**

**Hamster1000: Sis, why don't you use your account to review? Anyways, thank you. =)**

**leggo lover 99: I looked all over the web, trying to figure that out, but I couldn't. So I just gave up and did what I liked with him. XD Don't apologize, it's not going to be light and happy forever (muhaha)...**

**DISCALIMER: I own only my OC's Emmaline, Flame, Ore, Abby, Ali, & Jacob, the idea, & any poetry- NOTHING else, not even Ultimate Spider-Man or the quote(s).**

**Chapter 14: Dreams**

"**_The art of being happy lies in the power_**

**_Of extracting happiness from common things."_**

**_-Henry Ward Beecher_**

I love the rhythm that my life is settling into. There are ups and downs, but that's considered normal, and the downs make the ups seem twice as high. Danny is so sweet to me, and we both enjoy spending time together. We've gone out quite a few times over the past few weeks, and each time my heart soars. Ava teases me sometimes about Danny now- she's become like the sister that I never bothered to know.

The missions are sometimes hard, sometimes easy. Ava told me the other day that none of the major villains have made a move within the past few months- basically since I came to S.H.I.E.L.D., which we both agree is rather suspicious. She told me about Dr. Doom, and how he tried to destroy the Helicarrier (before it was blown up anyway by another bad guy) when they brought him to HQ (she didn't say _why_ they had brought him there in the first place though, if he was so dangerous).

Nick says that everybody has to go to college as 'cover'. He's forcing us to all go to the same college, and so that's the way it'll be, I guess. I haven't really thought about what degree I'll go for, but I was thinking maybe a doctor. Then I could help people. Ava confided to me that she wants to be an archaeologist. At least we don't have to get jobs- I'm planning on staying with S.H.I.E.L.D. as my career.

I like this novel feeling- being able to control my life. I can make my own choices, and their consequences are my responsibility; only mine. I've never had freedom like this to spread my wings and fly, and I love every moment of it. It's as if I'm just learning what it feels like to live with the sole purpose of living; I feel unbelievably happy and alive. If anybody who knew me a year ago saw me on the street, they wouldn't be able to recognize me, not for a million dollars.

I have a family; my teammates. I have a home; the Tricarrier. My life isn't perfect, but it is to me, if that makes any sense.

Today's my birthday; I'm eighteen now, and I'm casting away the chains of my younger years that have bound me for over a decade. They're what have been keeping me from giving up at points, but they're also what have made me miserable time and time again. I remember my siblings, I remember my parents, but I don't know them anymore. I don't know what kind of people they are- I haven't even bothered to find out if they're still alive. If they had died, I'd like to think that I'd know, that somebody would have at least told me, but that's just wishful thinking.

I'm moving on. Whatever happens to them from here on isn't my fault, I left my family to protect them. They likely have long forgotten me and moved on years ago. I have a real family now, one that I'd die for.

Stretching, I swing my legs over the side of my bed, done thinking. Once I'm dressed, I go to the kitchen and fix myself a simple breakfast. None of my friends know that it's my birthday, but that's fine; I'd rather just spend time with them like I usually do anyways. I don't ever celebrate my birthdays, not that I can remember anyhow.

Ava soon walks in, followed by the remainder of my teammates. Yawning and bleary-eyed with sleep, they drowsily fix themselves their usual meals. Ava sits down next to me, eating her eggs and toast. As Danny passes by me to get a cup, he leans down and whispers in my ear, "Happy birthday," as he walks away. I grin at him, my heart swelling that he knows.

After breakfast, I walk into the living room, and Ava suggests that we play a game. Everybody agrees, grateful for something to do. Sam and Ava bicker over what game to play for a few minutes, before (finally) deciding on Monopoly.

Halfway through the game, I'm losing badly, Luke's already broke, Ava's stuck in jail, Sam's starting to mortgage, and Danny owns ninety percent of the board. We're laughing, joking around like we usually do. After a couple of hours, the game ends (with Danny winning).

As Luke, Ava, and Sam stand up to leave, Danny puts a hand on my shoulder. "Would you like to go for a picnic?" he asks in an undertone. I nod, happy to get outside for a little while.

In Central Park, we spread out a large blanket on the grass, and Danny produces some fresh food from a paper bag. We eat, making small talk- except with Danny, 'small talk' is more of a philosophical conversation or debate that ends when both of us are laughing too hard to continue.

By the time we're back at HQ, it's sunset. Together, hand in hand, we watch the beautiful scene, drawing closer and closer, until by some slight of chance, our lips meet and we're kissing, more passionately than ever before. When we break away, I can't help but feel like this is the best thing that's ever happened to me.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( ((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))))))))**

The summer months fly by so quickly, and soon it's time to start college classes. I've been dreading this day for a while now, but I've been telling myself, "Oh, it's two months away," but that soon became, "Oh, it's still two weeks away," until, the day before, I forced myself to go to Nick and get my bag full of notebooks and pencils.

We all end up walking to the college itself together, but then we have to go our separate ways. The classes aren't like High School, though- the professor just talks, and I write down whatever I think is important. By the end of my first lecture, I've decided that college isn't so bad.

That night, I'm exhausted, and I fall asleep as soon as I lay down.

_A girl in a hoodie walked across the street. This was New York City. Her name was long gone- she went by Flame, and for a very good reason, not just secrecy. Thanks to her genetics, she was born with a mutation that enabled her to control fire, as she had discovered at the age of eight. Now fifteen, Flame had left her weak parents behind soon after discovering her mutation, tired of trying to live a useless, mundane life._

_She wasn't here without reason. Flame was here to kill that girl. Although she hadn't told Doom her connection with Emmaline Carlson, Flame knew that the villain had guessed it. There was a certain resemblance, that no matter what Flame did to herself, would always be there. They shared the same temper._

_Flame had cut her hair short, right to her chin. The sole reason she hadn't cut it into a boy-cut was to hide her pixie-like pointed ears that she had hated ever since she could remember. Her eyes had once been brown, but when her mutation surfaced, the brown had faded to gray, along with her skin. Flame knew she had been considered beautiful when she was younger, but now she was so strange looking that nobody saw past their first glance._

_It did make these jobs easier, though. Flame was a genius, and unafraid to show it to her prey, who quivered in fear-if they saw her. Although fire glowed bright, ashes were dark and concealed herself well._

_Ore was trying to catch up with her now. "What do you want?!" she snapped at her brother._

_He blinked. "You aren't really going to do this again, are you?" _

"_Of course I am! What would you expect? I've done this sort of thing before, and it's none of your business what I do with my life!"_

"_Yes, it is. I'm your brother, and-"_

"_No, Ore-"_

"_Quit calling me that! My name's Ian, for the last time, and your my sister, so duh, I love you and it is my business what you do!"_

_Flame shook her head. Ore was just putting himself in danger, like always, deaf to her warnings. "I'm going to kill her, and there's nothing you can do about it. Doom already tried this with Deadpool, and Deadpool actually thinks he killed her. Doom knows, though, that she's alive- the tracker that Deadpool put on her is still there, and if she'd been blown to smithereens, the tracker would've been too. Besides, even villains can watch the news or read the newspapers, and J.J.J. won't shut up about Spider-Man's new 'friend'."_

_Ore stared at her, wide-eyed. He always had a soft heart, but he loved his sister and would make Flame whatever weapon she needed. After all, he had followed her here all the way from Minnesota, like a lost puppy. He may have only been thirteen, but he was powerful._

_Flame continued, "I'm killing her, but I want her to suffer. Ore, this girl is the cause of all our problems now- she abandoned us, you see, and left us to deal with this mess. She _deserves _to suffer. She found a new family- she even has a boyfriend."_

"_What have you been doing, stalking her?" Ore cried._

_She ignored him. "I'm killing him first. She can watch him die. He is known as the Immortal Iron Fist, but the world will see just how mortal that boy is. Then I'll let her bleed, slowly, and she can helplessly watch as I kill her friends off one by one, and I'll make sure she's dead. I'm not going to blow her up- I know that will just make her stronger." Flame was speaking more to herself than her brother. "You can't kill her using energy. We're the most powerful mutant family to ever be born, and we'll be victorious over the world."_

_Ore stared at her. He thought her to be insane, Flame knew that much, but this boy would never lay a finger on his elder sister. It was a true love-hate relationship. Ore wouldn't stop her from killing that girl- nobody would, not even the girl herself. Because when that girl is your sister, no one has more right to her than yourself._

I groan, tossing and turning.

The nightmares are back.

Angrily, I tear off the sheets, before the dream comes flooding back to me. It was a Memory again- something that already happened.

Someone wanted to kill me? That's all I can remember from the dream. Usually I remember my dreams all too vividly, but not tonight, thank goodness.

So, despite the fear gnawing me deep down, I dismiss it as a dream about Deadpool. I know Deadpool was mentioned in it, meaning it must have been Dr. Doom plotting with Deadpool, right? I remember Dr. Doom being involved too. Yes, that must have been it.

I turn back over and fall asleep again.

_Ali lays in the corner of the schoolyard, her hands raw from being shoved into the sidewalk again. She is a bright, playful girl, but the other children don't know that, because Ali is too shy to show them. Instead they know her as The Mutant. The Mutant who controls dirt._

_It doesn't sound grand, and it isn't. Her parents vanished when she was young, still a toddler. Ali had always felt so alone. There is a girl, a kind young woman who comes to her sometimes when she's sad, and listens to her troubles. Otherwise, the only family she still has is her younger brother Jacob. She can hardly believe that all her older sisters, her older brother too- that they had all left her. Ali loves them so much._

_Jacob is only six, but everybody knows he's a mutant. The nurses always tell her that she is a miracle, that it's impossible to believe that every child in her family is a mutant, but Ali knows it's true. _

_There was a girl she can't remember. Who left before she was born. The girl was kind and generous, like Ali herself. Then there is Sofia, who played pranks on Ali before she ran away. Ian went with her, even though he and Sofia never got along. Abby is ten now, but she has been gone for nearly a year. She disappeared while they were swimming with their foster family, and everyone said she must have drowned, but Ali had seen her wave good-bye, as she swam away underwater._

_The kind lady hasn't come for over a year. She stopped coming when Abby disappeared. Wait! Here she is! Wait, where is she going? Come back!_

_Ali felt the tears running down her face, and she let the warm earth embrace her, tired off all the people leaving, all the good-bye's. Good-bye to the kind lady now too. She wouldn't come back._

My alarm is ringing, and with a sudden burst of irritability, I smash it with my hand. I was in the middle of a sad dream again, and it comes back with complete clarity.

Sofia? Ian?

No, no. This is a living nightmare, here. Coming true. They can't still know me. I don't want to have a sister named Ali, a brother named Jacob. I want to let these people go on living, oblivious to my existence. I'm tired of this regret, the 'what-if's. I've had years of those, and it's time to let go. I'm finished with seeking truth where I won't find anything but black, twisted lies.

Somebody knocks on my door. "WHAT?!" I scream at whoever is there.

"Em? What's wrong? Can I come in?" Ava sounds concerned.

"How can we help you?" Danny's here too.

"You can't help me! Go away, get away from me! I don't want anyone else to die, I'm tired of people trying to kill my family," I sob at them. I can remember both of the dreams now, and it doesn't take an idiot to piece the two together.

Ava whispers to Danny, "We'd better get Fury." I can hear one pair of retreating footsteps.

"Emma... we are your friends. We can help," Danny murmurs softly.

I turn away. No. I can't get that girl's- Flame's- voice out of my head. _I'm killing him first. She can watch him die. He is known as the Immortal Iron Fist, but the world will see just how mortal that boy is._

Her words echo through my mind, and I hate myself for trusting anybody. I don't deserve friends anymore. I should have seen this coming. It's my fault for not realizing that people don't forgive and forget very easily. Especially when they want revenge.

More knocking. I can hear them muttering amongst themselves, but Danny's voice is absent from the conversation. Is he even still there? What does it matter, anymore? These people aren't dying for me. I won't let it happen. Why are they even here? It's five in the morning. They should be asleep.

Did I scream in my sleep? Did I cry, did I talk? I don't know if this room is soundproof, but it occurs to me that Nick likely has cameras in every room of the Tricarrier.

Suddenly, a hissing sound comes from one of the vents. I sniff the air- what the-? Blackness.

**B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B# B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B#B**

**:-) Sorry that this has taken me so long to get up. There should be another chapter up today. However, tomorrow is my brother's birthday so I'll do two chapters on Friday. :-)**

**Please review. ;-)**

**-FFS**


	15. The Chain

**Thanks for the review TheOnyxDragon12! J**

**DISCLAIMER: I own only my OC's Emmaline, Flame, Ore, Abby, Ali, & Jacob, the idea, & any poetry- NOTHING else, not even Ultimate Spider-Man or the quote(s).**

**Chapter 15: The Chain**

**_"I postpone death_**

**_By living_**

**_By suffering_**

**_By error_**

**_By risking_**

**_By giving_**

**_By losing."_**

**_-Anais Nim_**

**_Flame's POV_**

**I have a plan. That girl will die, but she will pay with more than her life. She abandoned me to my fate, and she deserves worse than death's final kiss. She has felt the warm embrace of life, and she is living life to its fullest, unafraid of the end. She believes life is a circle. Any circle can be cut. I will bind her with her own chains.**

**That girl has made her own family, and left those of her own blood to their fate. Now she will meet ****_her_**** fate.**

**There are many ways to die, but I have to find the worst. There are many kinds of pain, but I have to find the strongest. There are many types of friends, but I have to find the best.**

**I am going to find a painful, slow way of death. She doesn't deserve to go quickly, but to have the suffering long, drawn out. This was the trouble with Deadpool; he didn't hate her the way I do- the sole reason he had to kill her was money, and money isn't everything.**

**I slip my dagger into my belt. It is of Ore's finest workmanship, a birthday present. The blade is keen and sharp. I won't use it; this dagger is too good for her scum- it cuts cleanly, and clean cuts are the easiest to heal, the easiest to bear. If I want her to truly suffer in her final moments, then this isn't my weapon. Rather, this dagger is for my self-defense against whatever thilth dares to approach me.**

**Her friends must suffer too. They will have shorter deaths than she, lest she miss their final moments and find comfort in the fantasy that they may have lived. For merely befriending her, they deserve to pay with their lives. I have no mercy, and will show none to my enemies. The only people who are not my enemies are my friends, and few are friend to me.**

**BPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBPBP BPBPBPBPBP**

**_Emma's POV_**

I don't open my eyes, letting their words wash over me. I know that I'm in the infirmary, but I don't want to have to face my friends. This is turning into a living nightmare. All I want is to forget my brothers and sisters of that past life and move on- just to enjoy the life I've found hear amongst these friends. More than I want to live, though, I want my friends to be able to enjoy life, and live. If that means leaving home again, then that's what I will do.

Most of the voices gradually stop talking, fading into the distance. Eventually, the only voices I can hear are those of my teammates.

"What's wrong with her?" Ava mutters in a low voice.

"I don't know. I'm hungry, let's go eat."

"_Sam_!" she chides.

I feel a gentle hand brush hair off of my face. "_Let her sleep, for when she wakes, she will move mountains_," Danny quotes softly. I hear two chairs scoot back, and footsteps leaving. After another few minutes, I hear Ava telling Danny that they could leave now- Fury said to let me rest. I don't hear Danny leave, though. At last, I sit up, and someone hands me my glasses. Danny.

Carefully, he takes my hand in his, looking me in the eyes.

"Danny…" I falter. "I- I had a dream." I swallow hard, blinking.

"It is okay. You do not have to talk about it until you are ready."

I shake my head, a lump forming in my throat. "No, Danny. It can't wait. I- I-" Taking a deep breath in, I resolve to tell him the whole story. It's time for him to know the truth. I have to tell somebody what happened. "Danny… I can't control this. I've never been able to. It's been this way as long as I can remember.

"I ran away when I was little. I knew I was putting my family in danger, so I left. Even then, I knew… I knew what I was born to do. I wandered around for a long time. Years. When I was twelve, I found a place in New York City that said they could help me. They couldn't, though, and they wiped all my memories of the place because I asked them to.

"It turned out I was asleep for a long time. Five years. After I woke up, and they'd wiped my memories, I decided to start my life over, and I did. For some reason, I never did find what I was looking for, and I was lonely. Then I found you, and… I joined S.H.I.E.L.D."

I've never told anybody this much. It still isn't the entire story, but it will do.

Danny looks at me. "What is the matter?"

"I… my siblings didn't forget me. Not the way I wanted them to. Their lives are almost as messed up as mine… And one of them hates me for leaving. She's working for… for… Dr. Doom." I can't continue; unable to meet Danny's eyes, I stare at the sheets, twisting them in my hands.

Danny lifts my chin up. "This is not your fault. You cannot control other people's choices, Emma; all you can do is choose how you respond to them," he murmurs.

How does he always know what I'm thinking, what I'm trying to say? "Danny- it _is_ my fault. She's… not so well off. I guess… my family turned out to all be mutants… and- and- she and my brother- they're coming…" my voice drops so low that I don't think Danny can even hear me anymore. "… They're coming to kill me. You. Everybody."

Danny looks at me sadly, then embraces me. Letting go, he says, "They can try. They will not succeed."

My eyes tear up. He knows, Danny understands, but he refuses to believe that they will kill us. He knows the taste of revenge, but he doesn't know how badly my sister hates me.

**/VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV VVVV\**

Nick questions me once he finds out that I'm awake. I don't tell him anything. Perhaps he deserves to know, maybe he doesn't, but either way, I don't trust him the way I trust Danny or Ava. Not with this kind of secret. Besides, Nick isn't stupid; he's been tracking me for years, and however many cameras and microphones I may have destroyed, he's bound to have learned plenty about me from his agents and various other means that only he knows about. Nick works for the government, and whatever he learns goes in the S.H.I.E.L.D. database, which, like any other computer, _can_ be hacked, despite what he would prefer us to believe.

Another reason that I don't want to admit to Nick is that I really don't have much more control than I did a few months ago, but I have far more power. My hands are buzzing at this very moment, and I don't know how to make it stop. I'm afraid that he'll ban me from leaving the Tricarrier- that would mean no more Central Park, no more dates with Danny, no more college, no more freedom. I've spent so much of my life in fear, and I'm tired of this responsibility. I just want to be an average eighteen year old girl.

Being average, though- that wouldn't suit me. I wouldn't know what to do. My entire life has been spent in extremes. I'm tired of living in black and white; I want some color. I want to go places, I want to travel the world. I want to mess around with my friends, I want to spend time with Danny. I want to help people, I want to be a hero.

_I want_. Such an unfamiliar, foreign phrase to my tongue. I wish I could taste those words, let them tumble from my lips, for everyone to see. So that these people could see that there's a person behind this name, a life behind those powers. I have dreams that I haven't dared to think before, but look at me now.

I have friends. Ava, Luke, Peter, Sam, and Danny. Danny's more than a friend, though. They're my family, but Danny's closer to me than any of them. My friends are perfectly imperfect, wrong in all the right ways, weird in all the great places.

Sometimes, little notions run through my mind that I don't dare to think about. I do want some things in life, and I have wishes and dreams that don't involve my mutation in the least. I've accepted that I'll always be Emmaline Carlson, the girl with the uncontrollable mutation, but 'always' isn't 'forever', because there isn't any 'forever' in 'life'. Things can change. My mutation could be controllable. I could get a job, do the things I love. I can get married someday, and have a husband and kids. If I have friends like this, friends who accept me for who I am, who help me as I try to help them, I can do anything. I can give it my best shot. I can live.

That's the thing; _I want to live_. Everybody who I've ever went to for help, though, has warned me. This power can't be controlled for very long. I have a predetermined destiny, and I hate that. I'm tired of being the best I can about this. If I know that there's only two final results that can come of my life, destruction of everything or death of me, then there isn't a real choice. Not really.

I know that I have to die, but so does everybody. I would like to think that I'll know when I'm ready, when it's time to let go. Before then, though, I want to live a life. Maybe if I kept isolating myself like I did for years, then I would survive far longer, but that wouldn't be living, merely existing. I want to live, have experiences like any other person. If that means death coming sooner, then so be it.

Nick can't stop me from living. Nor can that girl who used to be my sister, Flame, or that brother who once was mine, Ore. Those aren't the people I knew, and they aren't my family anymore. They are my past, not my present, and never my future.

As I stand up to leave, I resolve to live. I'm tired of these rules that should extend my 'life', but prevent me from actually living. Taking a deep breath in, I walk outside and greet the world with a small half-smile.

Or, as it turns out, walk into Sam. He starts abruptly, then says, "Woa- you're out already? That was fast."

I roll my eyes playfully at him, grinning. "Where's everybody?"

"Uh… I don't know?"

As it turns out, Ava is reviewing her notes, Danny is meditating, Peter is doing who-knows-what at his house, and Sam and Luke are playing video games (Sam was fetching batteries when I ran into him). I sit down next to Ava, and we quiz each other on what we have in our notes.

"Can't you guys have any fun?" Sam asks us as he squints angrily at the television, watching his character being blown up.

"Yes!" Luke pumps his fist. "Finally beat you!"

"Just this once! And I wasn't paying attention- Ava distracted me! I demand a rematch," Sam protests. Luke laughs good naturedly, and they play again.

Suddenly, our coms start going off. Mission time! We hastily change, then set off to go fight. It turns out that Doc Ock sent some robots to collect samples from Stark Industries. You'd think that rich Tony Stark, AKA Iron Man, would have it all under control.

You'd think.

As it turns out, Mr. Stark is on vacation in Italy and can't be bothered to come back and save his fancy equipment- or at least that's the way Ava puts it. Typically, she's the only one who read the folder that we always get when we go on a mission, to read on the way.

The robots aren't actually too hard to blow up. Danny and Luke smash seven of them, and Ava manages to slice three with her claws. I concentrate, and slowly, the ones closest to me start shutting down. Buzzing with energy, I make the ones by Sam blow up. Sam casts a glare in my direction, then shoots a few more robots. Peter arrives just as we're finishing up.

"What took you, Web-Head?" Ava demands.

"Oh, um, nothing. Just, I was busy with MJ…" Peter trails off.

Sam gasps obnoxiously. "You were on a _date_!" If I could see underneath Peter's mask, I know he would be blushing.

"N-No-"

"Can it, Bug Breath. We get it already. Just don't do it again, okay?" Ava says, rolling her eyes. She mouths to me, '_Boys_'. I giggle.

"What is that..?" Luke asks, stammering. Everybody else whirls around.

No. This can't be happening. I'm doomed.

**J Hope you enjoyed! (If it seemed a little unclear at points, it was supposed to be.) Thanks for reading!**

**-FFS**


	16. I Refuse

**Thank you for the list of ideas, TheOnyxDragon12! I'll be using those (muhaha) soon. Thank you for the reviews:**

**BowTies23: Aw, thanks. Yeah, I hate cliffhangers too, but it's so tempting to write that way...**

**Hamster1000: (eye roll)**

**TheOnyxDragon12: Thanks for the ideas! :-D**

**DISCLAIMER: I only own my OC's and the idea- not Ultimate Spider-Man.**

**Chapter 16: I Refuse**

"_**You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it."**_

_**-Unknown**_

Flame's words ring through my mind. _I'm killing him first. She can watch him die. _No. She can't have sent her brother to kill him, not not, not ever. _The world will see just how mortal that boy is. _No!

Ore watches me, his face stoney. We are all ready to fight, muscles tensed, but he doesn't move. At last, he says, "You. You shouldn't be alive, Emmaline. Daniel Rand, you shouldn't kiss this girl. Peter Parker, you shouldn't be so mean to this girl. Ava Ayala, you shouldn't be friends with this girl. Sam Alexander, you shouldn't laugh at this girl. Luke Cage, you shouldn't fear this girl. None of you know this girl. None of you know her power, her mind, her soul, her... any of her."

I stare at him. This boy, he was my brother. He was my family. I cared about him. I knew him. Now we are strangers, enemies even. Ore is wrong, though, about my family.

Ava knows my secrets.

Sam knows my mind.

Peter knows my weakness.

Luke knows my power.

Danny knows my heart.

This boy, this child, knows nothing about me except who I was. "Why do you care anymore, Ian Carlson?"

His eyes. They're like two little mirrors that I can see a reflection of myself within. Ore looks so sad, I would feel terrible if it was anybody but him. "I am not Ian Carlson any more than you are Emmaline Carlson. Flame calls me Ore. I am Ian, but Flame is my only family, and if I am Ore to her, then I must be Ore to you, for both you and Flame are strangers to my heart, though my mind remembers Sofia and Emmaline, my sisters. Ore reminds me far too much of 'Orc', but perhaps that is what I am becoming. Who are you now?"

I can't help but pity him. "I am Emma. This is my family." I gesture to Sam, Peter, Luke, Ava, and Danny.

"What are their names?"

I shake my head. "They're nameless to you. They aren't your family, and you don't deserve them." Then I point to each of them in turn. "My love. My best friend. My protector. My clown. My trainer. These are my teammates, my brothers and sister."

Ore stares, his eyes a mixture of regret and jealousy, but no hate. "Have you told them?"

I hang my head. "Not yet."

"Flame wants me to kill. That's the way fire works, isn't it? Metals aren't of the same hateful nature. They can bend if the elements are in order."

"Good for you, Ore. You're a mutant. Go away. Find Charles Xavier- he can help. I can't. You're just a stranger, a whisper of my past. I've long since turned the page. It's still there, but I'm not going back. Go away. Find your own family. I have nothing for you." I have no regret at my words, because they ring true. I might care about the world, that's why I do this S.H.I.E.L.D. thing now, but I don't have any sympathy for this lost boy. I turn around, and my teammates follow.

"Wait," Ore whispers. I face him one last time. "I loved you. I missed you, sister. I don't hate you, I don't blame you. I regret that you didn't bring me. Flame thinks that I've killed your love by now, and trapped the rest of your family- readied you for death. Go."

Wise words from a thirteen year old. He had to grow up fast, though.

When we're back in the Tricarrier, I immediately pull Danny aside to talk to him.

"Danny. There's some... stuff that I haven't told you, yet. I guess you've figured that out, but... it's important stuff that you all need to know... My point is, I don't think I should keep putting you all in danger. Flame wants to kill you just because you know me."

Danny looks me in the eyes, then replies with utter calmness, "She wants to kill me because I love you. She wants to kill our friends because they are your friends. We are your family, Emma. We will not leave you."

I sigh to myself, hating Flame. "Danny, I need to tell you something."

"Then do."

"I'm... I'm _dying_, Danny." I can't hold the tears back any longer. "I'm dying," I choke. The tears are streaming down my cheeks, in little rivers.

Danny wraps his arms around me, then whispers, "I will never let you go."

**/VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV VVVVVVVV**

I'm telling my friends the Secret. I just have to spend some time alone first, to think. Danny understands how hard this is for me, even though he can't possibly know the sheer complexity of the Secret that I have to explain. After all, there is an enormous difference between knowing and understanding. As I leave to go to Central Park, Danny tucks some loose strands of hair behind me ear and kisses my forehead lightly. I smile weakly at his kindness.

In the park, I slump against a tree. Maybe I should be crying, or maybe I'm wrong to be here at all. From the corner of my eye I notice a woman starting to instruct a yoga class. I need to clear my mind somehow, so I join the session.

The familiar movements feel so completely right, flowing like water. Energy is buzzing everywhere, but it is peaceful, calm energy. By the end of the class, I feel a dozen times better. My decision to stay is made. Family is family, and this is the only chance at life I've got.

I walk home, observing the scenery, oblivious to the people around me. Ignorant to the little ball that someone chucks at me until it's too late, and I'm swimming in blue, cloudy gas, falling- down, down, down, into blackness.

**/VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV VVVVVVVV**

I ache everywhere. Slowly, I drag open my eyelids until I can see where I am. I am surrounded by gigantic metal machines, and am strapped to a cold, metal table, held in place by leather straps.

"Ah. You are awake. Emmaline Carlson, how long I have waited to study you. How happy I was when this opportunity arose." From the shadows, a horrifying scientist appears, held aloft by four long arms. I know this man. Otto Octavius.

I can remember Peter making fun of 'Doc Ock'. I laughed at the time. Now that I am here, helpless, I don't have the strength to even look in the madman's eyes. I close my eyes, trying to mentally prepare myself for the coming pain. When the needle pricks my skin, I am surprised that it doesn't hurt. Then, cold fluid surging through my veins, it comes. It takes everything I have to keep from screaming, crying, but I don't want to give him any satisfaction.

"Danny," I choke, coughing up blood.

"August tenth, six-thirty P.M. Injection A5 of chemical 8C, experimental, to suppress mutation as needed, trial one," Doc Ock rasps. "Successful. Mild discomfort, due to thickened blood."

So began the eons of pain, as everything melded together into one great horror. The only light I could see was somebody rescuing me, and I knew Danny would come. Danny had to. I couldn't die here.

I wouldn't die here.

**End of chapter! I might post the next one tonight, sorry that this one's so short.**

**-FFS**


	17. Unknown

**My apologies. There is a 2-chapter-day coming up soon. I promise. My glasses just broke, though, so I'm practically blind at the moment (my nose is 2 inches from the screen as I slowly type this out...). They should be fixed by Monday, and I can stop walking into doors.**

**DISCLAIMER: I only own the idea and my OC's. I do not own any quotes or Ultimate Spider-Man.**

**Chapter 17: Unknown**

"_**There are moments that mark your life,**_

_**moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same.**_

_**And time is divided into two parts,**_

_**before and after this."**_

_**-Unknown**_

_Ava's POV_

At first, nobody thought much of it when Emma didn't show up for dinner. She had probably just eaten before the rest of us, I thought to myself. Besides, Danny wasn't worried, so the rest of us decided that he knew what was going on, and was just fine with it. The trouble is, Danny usually appears calm even when he isn't, when he shouldn't be calm at all- I should have thought of that then. Maybe we would have found her sooner.

By the next morning, I still wasn't worried, assuming that she had something going on, and had just gotten up early and eaten before me. After all, this wasn't the first time she had done something like this; it was fairly common to only see Emma at meals, or not at all if she hurried. That girl had a knack for avoiding people when she wanted to, the same way she always seemed to know what we were thinking. Danny was the only one who understood her, really- I was just a friend, somebody to hang out with when she felt like having some fun, but it was Danny that she was really close to.

Danny was worried, though, I think. He didn't say anything, but he doesn't exactly talk a lot. At dinner, he voiced his concerns, and Fury got really mad at all of us. He said that we should have realized she had disappeared earlier. I asked him about her com and trackers, but Fury shook his head and said that she had refused any trackers, and her com was in her bedroom- so he had naturally assumed that she, too, was in her room, thinking.

We searched everywhere. Anywhere that Emma had some kind of connection with, we searched. She's traveled her fair share, as it turns out. Danny told me from day one that this strategy wouldn't work. He said that Emma knew everyone because of her mutation- but no one had bothered to know her. That hit home with me, but I still wanted to believe that we would find her. If Danny was being negative, though, I knew we had about zip chance of finding her like this.

Fury had people looking everywhere for her, combing the world. He didn't find any more than we did. In our spare time, we were supposed to look through the lists of criminals for anyone who might have taken her. The list spanned on and on. S.H.I.E.L.D. had lost track of most of the prime suspects, though, so it's not like that helped. It was more to make us feel like we were doing something.

Now, four months later, I've given up. You're not supposed to give up on friends and family, I know, but this is different. There's tons of people who would love Emmaline dead, so the chances of her being alive anymore are close enough to zero that I'm out of excuses to continue looking, hoping that we'll find her. Maybe Fury will find the body.

Danny's the only one who still thinks that she's alive, that there's some chance of finding her. I don't even know if he truly believes that anymore- he's probably just grasping for straws when there are none to be found.

S.H.I.E.L.D. found some tapes yesterday, and say they know who took her. That's it, though, and I don't bother going to watch the videos. I've got tests to study for. I'm tired of trying to find someone that's dead.

Fury wants us all to come and see them. More like he wants us there to support Danny, who's starting to lose it. I haven't seen Danny in a long time, except for brief glances. So I change my mind last minute and rush to the meeting room, sliding into a chair just as Fury walks in.

The tapes turn out to be documentaries from Doc Ock's lab. Of Emma being... tested. I don't know what he's doing, but it's horrifying. He's injecting her with medicines, electrocuting, and other things I don't recognize. The most terrible part is that she's just laying there, strapped to a table, but she doesn't scream or cry. She just talks, like somebody can hear her.

"Danny, Danny, when are you coming? Danny, can you please hurry up? Danny, Danny, it hurts, Danny I'm sorry..." Emma just goes on like that, quietly talking to 'Danny' the whole time. I glance at Danny, and his face is pale and stoney. At the end of the last video, he stands and leaves.

I start to follow him, but Fury stops me. "No, White Tiger, he just needs-" An officer rushes in, interrupting him.

"Director Fury, sir! Iron Fist punched a hole in the floor and left!"

Fury sighs. "Don't bother following him. Let him be. He's got to come to terms with this."

"Is she alive?"

He looks at me. "Didn't you hear the dates? The most recent one is from last week. I'd say it's safe to assume that she is... _alive. _We don't know her location. Just... sit tight, kid."

I sigh. It's easy for him to say something like that, but I don't feel like arguing with Fury right now, so I sink back into my chair.

_Emma's POV_

More pain. More, everywhere, all the time. I can hardly think straight anymore. I don't care what he's doing to me, as long as it's quick. Hurry, please hurry, Danny. Danny's coming soon. He will be here soon.

_That's what you've been telling yourself for months_.

He is coming! Danny, Danny can you hear me? Danny, you're coming soon, aren't you? You'll bring everybody, right? Danny, I'm ready to go, go anywhere but here. I'm ready to die, Danny, just kiss me goodbye first. It's like you say, every end is a new beginning, Danny, and this is going to end soon. The pain will stop, Danny, right? Nothing's forever, it will stop.

_As you've been saying ever since you got here._

That's okay, Danny is looking for me, he's probably already found me. Danny, could you please, please hurry? It hurts, Danny, and I want it to stop, please make it stop, Danny, please hurry.

Danny, I want to sleep. I'm tired, I haven't truly slept since I came here, Danny, come kiss me goodbye, I'm ready to go. Anywhere but here, Danny- I have to leave.

I'm going to die, Danny, but not here. Danny, once you rescue me, could you kiss me goodbye, because I'm ready for death?

_He's never coming._

Yes he is, I've been keeping track of the days, Danny, and it's only been four months- Danny, you're coming when it's been six months, right?

Oh, Danny, he's stopping, and I have an hour to sleep. I close my eyes, relieved for the moment of the pain; though there are still throbs of agony wracking my body, it has ceased enough for sleep to carry me away.

_Blissful quiet. I'm asleep. I sigh... it's been so long since I've escaped into a dream- a week, I think._

_**You are alive!**_

_Danny? Danny! He turns around, shrouded by mists. _

_**Where are you? I am coming!**_

_Danny, Danny, it's been so long! I want to hug him, wrap my arms around him and never let go, but it's only a dream. Danny, I'm in a lab with Doc Ock somewhere in New York City. It has lots of equipment. I sink down to the sidewalk, slumping against a brick wall. I want to cry, but I'm not crying. That madman doesn't deserve my tears. Danny is getting farther and farther away, or maybe I am..._

_**Wait! Where are you going? I-**_

More pain, more needles, more medicine.

Please hurry, Danny, please.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

Someone is shaking me, undoing the ties. How long has it been? It's February, I know that much. About two months since the Dream.

"Emma? Emmaline?"

I can't open my eyes, they are too heavy, but I can recognize the voice.

"Danny," I whisper hoarsely, my dry lips cracking.

"Emma, it is all right. It is all right." Oh, that voice. Strong, gentle arms lift me up, and I want to cling to him, but I am too weak to lift my arms up. I rest my head against his chest, and his words blend together.

"Danny, kiss me goodbye." I drag open my eyes, and I can see the blurred image of blonde hair, and a face, green eyes, then the head shakes, and I fall into darkness.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((()))) )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

"She's nearly gone," a deep voice says.

"Have her ready within the next month. I need her soon." Mr. Osborn's voice is cold, and I flinch.

Voices flicker in and out of reach, in and out. It doesn't seem like any time at all, but the days pass by, and the time spent in darkness versus awake blends together into one enormous mound of pain, pain, pain, until I don't care what's happening anymore.

"She is stable enough, sir."

"Good. Try her on subject A2."

"Yes sir."

More darkness. So much of my time is spent this way, when will it end?

Oh, no. They want me to transfer energy to this man that I am touching. No, no, I won't do it!

I WON'T!

Blackness.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( ((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

_They found her lying amongst the ruins of Osborn's Laboratories. She was almost dead, but not quite. They couldn't bring her to the Tricarrier, because the Tricarrier had exploded, and now they were staying with Peter again. So they brought her to the hospital, where Danny already was. They didn't know if she would live, but at least they had found her. At least they had found Danny. And they were both alive, even if it was only for now._

**El fin of the chapter! :-) [EDIT: I got my glasses fixed now, so hopefully the next chapter will be up soon, and I think that you will enjoy that one a lot, especially TheOnyxDragon12 and leggo lover 99! ;-)]**

**-FFS**


	18. Trying

**Hello! I think that leggo lover 99 and TheOnyxDragon12 will 3 this chapter, I hope I did okay with it and that it lives up to your expectations. Thanks for the reviews:**

**Hamster1000: I'm trying sis! Hold your horses.**

**TheOnyxDragon12: Yup. I'm not telling. You'll just have to read on and see! XD**

**BowTies23: It was meant to be that way at the end. :-) I didn't feel like giving you a cliffhanger again, so I just left a lot of loose ends to be tied up in the next chapter. :-)**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man. I however, do own this idea, and my OC's, thank you very much. **

**WARNING: Yeah, this is a chapter involving torture that is described in brief, minor detail for those of you who have been waiting to see a certain character suffer. If you don't like torture scenes, then I suppose you could just skim over that part or not read at all. Yeah... the torture part was foreshadowed in the previous chapter, so I'm sure you've all been expecting this...**

**Chapter 18: Trying**

"_**The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision."**_

_**-Helen Keller**_

_Danny's POV_

He had found her in a dream. She had told him where she was, and he had found her. When Danny quietly broke into the lab, he knew that he would have to hurry. Emma was right there, though. She was hardly recognizable; she was practically skin and bones, she was so weak and helpless. So hopeless.

He whispered her name, his heart pounding in his chest. What if she was... gone? "Emma? Emmaline?"

She hardly could manage to reply, her lips cracked and bleeding as they parted, forming his name. "Danny."

Danny felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He could remember the monks' words of warning to not allow emotions overwhelm him, but Danny payed them no heed. "Emma, it is all right. It is all right." The words were as much a comfort to him as to Emma, and Danny slowly lifted her, hugging Emma gently to his chest.

She dragged open her eyes, then hoarsely said, "Danny, kiss me goodbye." Then she become utterly, completely limp and still.

"No, no Emma!" Danny's arms were quivering as he shook his head, his voice echoing throughout the dismal lab. He couldn't stop the tears from falling slowly down his face. Emma's shallow breathing could still be heard, ragged and uneven, as she struggled on each inhale and exhale.

"Who would this be?"

No. Doc Ock. Those were the last things that ran through Danny's mind before he felt something hit him on the back of the head, and blackness swallowed him.

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( ((((((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))**

Danny's head throbbed. Rough bindings cut into his skin, trapping him against a metal board.

"Ah, you are waking," Doctor Octopus laughed coldly.

His eyes shot open. He was in the lab that he had found Emma in, but Emma was gone. "What did you do with her?" he growled.

Doc Ock's eyes flashed. "_He_ grew impatient with me. _He _came and took her. She isn't ready, I told him that- she's too unstable! I still haven't found what made her tick. But," he turned to Danny, "I will find out what gives you that fist of yours." He cackled insanely.

No! Danny fought against the bindings, but they were tied too tightly, and his wrists stung as they began to bleed. "You will never find the answer, for magic is beyond your comprehension!"

"Magic?!" he scoffed. "As if! Science is the one and only sure thing in this world. Now, to begin."

He lowered the table, and pulled Danny's right hand closer with his mechanical arm. From another one of the doctor's arms came a buzzing saw, and he brought it closer and closer until it shredded the skin of Danny's hand. Pain roared, and it felt as though his hand was on fire. Blood sprouted everywhere from the wounds, trickling off of the edge of the table.

Danny squeezed his eyes shut, trying to ignore the pain. He attempted to breath in and out steadily, but he couldn't calm himself. The agony was overwhelming, consuming him, until more darkness consumed him.

When Danny awoke, his hand still burned so badly he could hardly think, though the pain had dulled slightly. The sickening scent of his own blood made him nauseous, but at least the 'doctor' was done with him for the moment. Danny knew he had only one hope.

He wriggled his left hand, loosening the ropes just enough that he could bang his communicator against the table so that it turned on. Ava's face flickered across the screen, and although Danny could not hold the device close enough to his face that she could see him, he turned it so that she could see where he was. "Help," he whispered hoarsely, and he could hear Ava exclaiming something, but the pain overwhelmed him again.

"Stupid, stupid hero," Doc Ock hissed. Danny blinked, awakened by the villain's voice. "You brought them here! You contacted them! You will pay for that, boy!"

A horrible, sizzling sensation spread throughout Danny's body. His muscles tensed, and he couldn't move, he was frozen in place, pain roaring in his skull. It was as if boiling water was pulsing beneath his skin, and his heart began to beat faster. Every bone ached, every muscle tensed in agony. Then it was over.

His whole body tingled, and his fingertips felt numb. Danny could hear Doc Ock clambering about the lab, then approaching him again. "This will make you-"

He was interrupted by a loud crashing noise from behind him, and Doc Ock began to panic. "No! Not so soon!"

Danny's body still buzzed and tingled. If this was what Emma felt like all the time, then he didn't know how she could bear simply living. Far away, he could hear voices yelling, familiar voices, and Doc Ock hastily began pouring some sort of liquid into a vial. Suddenly, the entire lab shook, and the doctor dropped the vial, spilling it all over Danny's face.

His eyes stung, and he shut them. The liquid was boiling, and sizzled on Danny's skin as it cooled. Then he was in agony, his eyes felt like they were on fire, burning underneath his eyelids, and the madman was screaming at the people in the distance.

"GET BACK OR I WILL INJECT THIS CYANIDE IN YOUR FRIEND HERE!"

Far away, Ava yelled, "NO!" as a needle plunged into his arm. Danny couldn't breath, every breathe rattled his skull. What was happening? He felt like he was spinning, air rushing at him. Then, silence.

**/\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\**

_Emma's POV_

Where am I? I can feel soft sheets rubbing against my bare legs. Weakly, I try opening my eyes, blinking. White walls surround me, as well as numerous large machines connected to... me. My head spins, and the world shakes. Slowly, I try sitting up, but the small tremors become an earthquake, and I collapse back onto the bed, exhausted.

Nurses come in, delicately checking my vitals. I can tell that they are nervous about what I might do; apparently they know I'm not your average girl. Eventually, I fall back asleep, only to be wakened by the sound of voices.

"No, Web Head, be quiet, she's asleep!"

"Who's asleep?" I mutter thickly, my words slurred with sleep.

"You're awake!" Ava sounds surprised. Wait, Ava's here? I try pushing myself up again, but even when I drag my eyelids open, I can't see much; everything is blurry. "Oh, for Pete's sake, Peter, where'd you put her glasses?!"

Somebody roughly shoves a pair of glasses on my face, and I blink, the world readjusting itself. "Is- is Danny okay?" Those are the first words that come to mind.

Sam glances at Luke, who shrugs. Ava glares at them both, then says, "He's... asleep right now. You can see him... later."

Weakly, I nod, then manage a half-smile, my eyes drooping again. I can hear the boys talking, and their words float around me as I drift back into sleep.

I stay that way for awhile, passing in and out of sleep. When the room comes into focus again, I find Nick sitting in the waiting chair. If I didn't feel so drained, I might be surprised.

"That was some stunt you pulled back there," he says gruffly. I don't reply, so he continues, "That was a lot of energy. Lot of force. You're lucky that the lab was at the bottom of a river- you only flooded the area right beside the riverbank, and the river just got a whole lot deeper, kid. You've... certainly been holding back on us."

"It's... not like I had... much of a choice... really," I say softly. Just speaking those words make me tired, with the amount of thought and effort required to do so.

Nick simply looks at me. "I have no idea what happened back there, Carlson- you owe me an explanation."

"Carlson?" I grin.

"Kid, you've got some explaining to do." At that, Nick rises to his feet, and walks to the door. As he leaves, he tosses a few final words over his shoulder. "Rest, now, so you can do it."

It's funny- all I want is peace and quiet to sleep. I feel like I haven't slept well in years. That's what the next few days end up being; sleep, talk with someone, sleep, start over again. They start letting me eat the (nasty) hospital food.

The day that I wake up to see Danny sitting beside my bed, though, is the day that I truly feel alive again. Like I want to feel better and do something. His beautiful, kind green eyes look past me, towards the wall, and he smiles, squeezing my hand with his unbandaged arm.

"You're... okay," I whisper. He grins back at me.

"You are okay."

I sit there, just staring back at him, until Danny clumsily leans in and kisses me, tangling us both in the tubes and wires. My heart leaps up, and I feel laughter tumble from my mouth.

"Hello," he murmurs in my ear.

"Why didn't you kiss me goodbye?" I ask afterward.

"I waited to kiss you hello again. The end is just a new beginning."

I can't stop myself from breaking into a smile, then I notice that Danny's not looking me in the eyes like he normally does when we talk. Instead, he is still staring at the wall, his eyes cloudy and empty. "Danny... what's wrong?" I ask, my voice ridden with concern.

"Nothing is wrong anymore."

"No, Danny... why aren't you looking at me?" My voice is quivering slightly, and my mind produces only one explanation, which I do not understand.

"My eyes do not see you, but my heart still does," he says softly.

I can't stop the tears from gathering in my eyes, and I blink them away as quickly as I can. Sorrow is still mingled unmistakably in my words, though. "I'm... I'm sorry Danny. This is my fault."

"No," Danny says firmly, "It is no more your fault than anyone else's. Emma, it is fine. You and I are okay now. We are alive."

Once he's gone, I still smash my face into my pillow and sob for Danny, my heart sinking horribly, because it _is_ my fault, and no amount of apologies can fix this.

Danny and I go home on a Thursday night, after I have been in the hospital for exactly one month. It takes all day getting out of the hospital. A S.H.I.E.L.D. officer drives us home. Danny tells me that we're staying at Peter's for now, and I don't ask why; I just want things to be the way they were before.

I must have fallen asleep on the way there, because all of the sudden I feel Danny gently shaking me, then lifting me into my wheelchair and covering me with a warm, fuzzy blanket. The early spring air is chilly and jolts me awake. Fear builds up in my stomach, fear at facing my friends. It was different when they saw me, sick, in the hospital; now I have to face what happened, and I really don't want to.

Danny slowly pushes me up the driveway, unwavering in his steps despite that he cannot see where he is going. Once we reach the doorway, we don't even have to knock- it opens right away to reveal a warm, smiling woman with short gray hair. Peter's Aunt May. The house is bright and inviting. She welcomes us enthusiastically. "Why, you must be Peter's friends! Come in, come in!"

I can feel her uncertainty. She knows that something bad happened to me. Still, though, I have to admire her for her politeness and ability to hide her concerns. I manage an almost-smile, but pull the blanket closer around me. Ava, Sam, Peter, and Luke are waiting inside. Their welcomes overwhelm me, and I find myself simply half-nodding at everyone, dazed.

Mrs. Parker ushers Danny and I toward the stairs, telling us that I will be staying in the guest bedroom with Ava while Danny will share Peter's room, when she realizes that I can't exactly walk up the stairs. Danny doesn't hesitate, scooping me up and starting up the stairs, a smile dancing playfully across his lips as he deposits me on the bed. I collapse onto the pillows, sleepily waving good night, then fall asleep.

The next morning, I wake early. Ava is asleep in the twin bed beside me. I try lift myself out of bed and stand, but my legs wobble unsteadily, and I fall to my knees. I don't like being so weak, unable to do the things I could before. Danny says I can't blame myself, but I do anyways.

In the end, I manage to get dressed and brush my teeth. Then I have to face the stairs, which I end up scooting down slowly, step by step. The wheelchair is still there, at the foot of the stairs from last night, and I gradually ease myself into it.

Maybe I can't do the things I could before, but I will be able to do them again at some point. I just have to keep trying, keep living. That's what I tell myself as I struggle with the simplest things all day. My friends continuously help me, but I detest not being able to do them myself. Then I realize that Danny can't do all the things he could before either. Even though he doesn't ask for help or complain, he loses his way around the rooms, feeling pieces of furniture to find his way (unintentionally knocking Mrs. Parker's decorations down, which he apologetically picks up and tries replacing to their former positions without much success). For me, this weakness is temporary; I will build up the strength to do everything I could before. Danny, though, won't ever see again.

I hate this new start. By the end of the day, I find myself of in a corner of the guest room, silently crying. I hate my weakness already. Danny, of course, finds me, and turns me around, about to say something wise, but I kiss him instead, burying myself in his strong arms. "_Never let me go_."

"I won't," he whispers, and we sit there the rest of the evening, staring at what was and what is. I don't like picking up these broken pieces, and either laboriously gluing them together again, bit by bit, or throwing them and starting anew, but I'm not letting go of my family now. Never again.

**Dun dun dun! :-) 1,000 views- yay! :-D :-D**

**-FFS**


	19. Regrets and Mistakes

**leggo lover 99: Aw, that makes me feel so happy, thank you. =) =) =) **

**DISCLAIMER: I only own the idea & my OC's, not Ultimate Spider-Man (unfortunately).**

**Chapter 19: Regrets and Mistakes**

_"Healing is embracing with love and mercy_

_That which has been pushed away."_

_-Stevin Levine._

I can't sleep again. Each time I close my eyes, the images return. They're not my memories; I don't know whose they are. Someone touches me, and I slap my hand at the energy buzzing everywhere around me. _Go away. I don't want to talk to you._

She wants to tell me something, but I don't want to listen. I can't stop her, though.

_My name was Amy. I had a boyfriend, and I loved him. I wasn't that different from you. Look at me. LOOK AT ME!_

An image of a girl around my age, with choppy black hair and a side swept bang rushes through my mind. She likes pop music, I can tell immediately, and her boyfriend rode a motorcycle. She died two years ago, when somebody murdered her. A man in a black hoodie, smoking a cigar, leaning against a brick wall. Joseph Lakes. He did it thoughtlessly, for his own entertainment.

_LOOK AT WHO I WAS!_

A hand touches me again, and I slap it as hard as I can. This time, though, my hand meets another hand, not air. I open my eyes, and see the outline of Danny leaning over me. "Danny, I'm sorry!" I whisper to him.

"It is fine. What is wrong?" he asks quietly, unusually direct.

I shake my hands, trying to rid myself of the buzzing sensation. "I… I can't sleep."

Danny fumbles for my hand, then helps me stand up, leaning against his sturdy, warm body. "Why did you come here?" I wonder softly.

"I could not sleep either," he murmurs, pressing me closer to him. "Something is… wrong tonight." Danny stiffens, and his eyes widen.

"What? What's wrong?"

He squeezes my hand. "Try to sleep." I hear Danny stumbling, feeling the air in front of him as he tries finding his way. Sighing, I resign to at least try. It's either stay up with _Amy_ or have more nightmares. Surprisingly, I fall asleep fairly quickly.

_Danny sighs. "So I cannot come back this year?"_

_The monk shakes his head. "No. After this, things are too unstable. You know this, Daniel. One last year."_

_"Yes, Sensei. Namaste." Danny bows._

_"Namaste, Daniel. Do not allow yourself to become polluted by the outside world."_

Wait, what? I shake my head, trying to remember what I just saw, but the images refuse to come. The words, however, greet me readily, and I bury my face into the pillow, trying to stop them from coming, instead falling into another nightmare.

_War. Blood. War. When will this end? The smell is sickeningly sweet. When Sage was alive, she fought. Now she had nothing to offer them. Dead. Like so many others. Even in death, the weight of the world rests upon her shoulders. This bloodshed was her fault, the losses a result of her mistakes, just like everything else that had gone wrong._

_Another man dies. Another gunshot rings out. Why do the men still fight? It hurt in life, and it aches in death. Why even bother with these battles any longer? The rebels will lose, like they have every time in history. Even if they won the war, they would have lost everything important to them. War does that to people._

_It is strange for Sage, looking back on these memories. They all bring pain, but they all were pain, so what can she expect? Wounds to heal? No, these wounds will not heal, not even into scars. They would bleed for all of eternity._

I wake in cold sweat, the stench of blood making me nauseous. Looking over to Ava's bed, I can see that she has already left. I'm alone.

Why do I still have to have these dreams? Why can't these people just move on without me? I can't have a moment of rest anymore. They come to me now, whether I am awake or asleep. Why don't I just give in?

That would be giving up. I can't give up. I want to live, have a life again. It's hard, though, for me to keep trying. It's so much easier to just give in, give up, and let any chances of living drift away.

I need help. This is too hard. I'm not a book to record others' lives within; I am a person, destined to live my own life. Weakly, I manage to shower and dress myself, _and _make it to the kitchen downstairs. Neither Danny nor I have been going to college. Nick says that we need time to recover. I know that if I can barely function around the house, then there's no way I would be able to maneuver through college.

Danny is the only person in the kitchen, sitting at the table and staring at the wall. Everybody else is either at college or (in Mrs. Parker's case) jousting at a Medieval Knights Tournament. "Good morning," he says as I collapse into the chair across from him.

I smile at him, then realize that (of course) he can't see my smile. "Morning, Danny." I look at him more closely. "What's the matter?"

He shakes his head at me. "Nothing is amiss. What are you going to do today?"

I shrug, but catch myself, and hastily reply, "I don't know."

"Would you like to do Kundalini Yoga together?" Danny offers.

The grin spreads across my face before I can stop it. This is one thing that time hasn't spoiled. "Yeah!"

Danny laughs. "You sound excited."

"Yeah… I just want things to be the way they were before, you know? I can't do anything, I feel so useless and weak right now…"

"Time will heal your wounds," he reminds me gently.

I nod. "I know, but... it's just... I never finished telling you guys what I had to say."

"Nor did I."

"Huh?"

"Go on."

I blink, confused. "Danny... I only told you that- that I'm dying. Everybody's dead or dying, you know, but I mean 'dying' as in, 'the end is near' kind of way." I take a deep breath in; this is a sore point for me, and I try not thinking about it. "You... you can't tell anybody, but I already know the... _nature _of my mutation. "

Danny just gazes at the wall, unseeing, and my heart throbs. "The truth hurts, but it is preferable to living a lie. There is an old tale. Life asked death, _'Why do people love me, but hate you?' _Death responded, '_Because you are a beautiful lie and I am a painful truth.'_ The words do ring true, don't they?" he says softly.

Tears well up in my eyes, and I am thankful for the first time that Danny cannot see me. "Danny... you don't understand. I was born to destroy."

"Many are."

"No, Danny," I whisper, horrified at what I have to say next. "I was born to destroy everything."

Danny sighs. "It is worst when we suspect something and then have it confirmed as truth, is it not?"

"You knew?"

"No, but Emma, there were... hints." His words sting, and I hate their bitter truth.

"I have to die, you know." There is a quiver in my tone, and I hate myself for allowing my words to falter for even a moment.

"Says who?" he replies defiantly, and a lonely tear trickles down my cheek, unnoticed by Danny.

"Says... everyone. Nick knows it deep down, but... I haven't told him yet. Professor Xavier says. Magneto says. I know." I do know, with my whole heart.

Danny is in a state I have never seen him in before. "So you just accept this as your fate?"

"We're all going to die, Danny. Immortality is the biggest lie of all, besides money." Ironically, I am the one who is saying that this is for the best, and Danny is telling me that it isn't.

"When?" His voice breaks.

"I don't know, Danny. I don't know. Eventually. I've been trying to just live. I can't control it at all anymore."

"This is why you are not healing," Danny accuses me.

"I'm scared," I admit, and the tears start falling. "I'm scared of the end."

Suddenly, I'm in his arms, Danny's anger ebbing away as I sob. "Do not cry," he whispers to me.

"I'm going to _die_. I have to die. I want to _live_! It's not fair... not fair at all..." I choke.

Danny strokes my head, and the memory of that terrifying night when I thought he would die, and I somehow ended up like this. "You can still make choices. You still have life; _It's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years_, Abraham Lincoln said. Emma, you do not have to let go now. Just... wait a little longer. You can choice your end."

I lift my tear stained face up to greet the world again, then slowly say, "What did you need to tell me before?"

He heaves a great sigh. "K'un L'un. I have exactly one year before I must return to take the throne. I should have left in two days, but... certain events occurred, and the monks think it best to wait."

"What's K'un L'un like?" I whisper into his shirt, closing my eyes so I can create a mental picture of the place.

"Peaceful, beautiful, grand. It is the most glorious place I have ever known upon Earth."

"Can- can I die there? With you?"

Danny lifts my chin up so I can see his face. "Emma, if that is what you would like, you could sleep peacefully there."

"Thank you," I say quietly. "Danny... I don't know how long I can last. I just want a magical cure, or something, you know? Something wonderful to happen, but... I know it won't, deep down. I'm so selfish, how can I even feel this way? I'm weighing my puny life against the whole existence? Why, why couldn't I just be normal?"

"Calm down. It is all right. This is your life now. You must live it. We will help, Emma. Now, how does ice cream sound? My treat."

I give him a watery grin. "Why not? I've only got so much more time to eat ice cream with you, right?"

Danny grins back, then kisses me softly. "I will carry you, and you tell me where to go now."

By the time we arrive at the small ice cream shop, we're both laughing harder than we have in months, and people stop and stare at us. I sit atop of Danny's shoulders, telling him where to go, when there's a curb- that sort of thing. The ice cream is good, but Danny's lips taste better.

That afternoon, Danny and I walk all over Central Park, calling to the birds, and wander throughout the enormous city, just enjoying ourselves. I'm exhausted when we arrive back at Peter's house, and everyone already ate dinner without us. It's slightly awkward, because nobody knows where we have been. Peter cracks some puns about us, but his aunt quickly shushes him and offers us leftovers (which we politely refuse).

Upstairs, we go through some of the gentler Kundalini movements before meditating. I feel happy and peaceful, like an enormous weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

When I wake the next morning, I realize I still have to tell everybody else. I'm unusually quiet at breakfast, and I know that Danny notices. He pulls me aside in the hallway as our friends rush off to college, and offers to explain for me. I graciously accept.

Nick, though, still needs a real explanation. For lack of a better idea, I type him an email explaining everything, and send it before I can give it a second thought.

Danny must have told them while I was upstairs reading, because that evening, Ava, Luke, Peter, and Sam are all abnormally quiet and polite to me, as if I were a delicate china piece that might shatter at any moment. I know my happy mood surprises them, but I want to live the next year to its fullest.

Over the next month, I help Danny with finding his way around (without feeling his way through a room, that is), and he helps me become stronger. He makes me let go and allow the energy to flow around me, and the way he teaches it, I nearly enjoy it. We both decide not to go to college even as cover. It's not worth it; Danny won't leave K'un L'un ever again, and I will be dead, so there are better things we have to fill our time with.

Eventually Nick notices what we've been doing. He decides we can try some of the easier missions, and I love the thrill they bring. Danny and I walk begin venturing to Central Park nearly every day for the yoga sessions, and I find us kissing- a lot.

Typically, things have to go wrong at some point. Nothing's forever, after all, so I can't help feeling I should have expected this when early one spring morning, when Danny and I are home alone, I hear somebody knocking at the door. I open it to see who it is, and hate myself immediately when I see the girl standing on the porch, who throws her arms around me in an enormous hug. Guilt gnaws at my heart, as I stand there uncomfortably.

Finally, I say, "Hello, Abigail."

The ten year old leaps up and down. "Hey, Emmaline!"

"Why are you here?" I ask bluntly.

She scoots closer to me, then says in what is obviously supposed to be an undertone, "Mags wants me. He stinks, you know, like that old lady smell?" At the look on my face, she corrects herself. "Just kidding! Ya know, I thought you could help...?"

"It's been years," I say dully. "How do you know me?"

Abigail shrugs. "Newspapers. There's lots about you. And the explosions. Do you have anger issues or something?"

"Abigail, I don't believe you. You're lying." I know that I am the one lying; I can see it in the young girl's innocent green eyes. Her hair is a mousy brown, just reaching her shoulders in beautiful waves. At my words, her eyes turn a dark, stormy blue, and her hair floats around her head.

"I'm not lying! I'm a mutant, and he WANTS me!"

I shake my head. "I don't know you anymore."

"You never stuck around to know me!"

"Exactly. I don't know you."

"Then get to know me!" she begs. "Please! I can be your little sissy, Abby. Puh-lease?"

"Go look in the phone book. Call Charles Xavier. He can help you. I can't." I turn away, about to close the door, but Abby has a few final words.

"You brat!"

I carefully snap the door shut, startled by the sudden turn of events. Abby had found me by looking through newspapers? It didn't matter, though. Abby was a stranger that I hated for simply sharing the same parents. I could feel the energy coming from her; she had mingled with her parents recently, and now I am forced to accept that they are alive.

And they're mutants that hate me more than I detest them.


	20. Lights Out

**Thank you so much for the reviews! ;-D They make my day! **

**BowTies23: Aw, thanks. You really were? Aw, that's sweet. =)**

**Hamster1000: Oh, be quiet. They're both 18, plenty old enough for this, sis. It's not gross! It's what happens when you combine descriptive writing & my insane mind!**

**leggo lover 99: I'm trying! ;-D**

**TheOnyxDragon12: Yes, she is. Very. Actually, I don't know where I got Sage from... (I tend to "improvise" my plot as I write). It probably would be a bit... yeah... but, don't worry, more excitement will be coming soon!**

**Chapter 20: Lights Out**

"_**What is family?**_

_**They were the people who claimed you**_

_**in good,**_

_**in bad,**_

_**in parts or in whole,**_

_**they were the ones who showed up,**_

_**who stayed there regardless."**_

_**-Sarah Dessen**_

It's funny the way something so small can affect you so much. Before answering the door, I had been cheerfully reading a book. Now it seems impossible to do something so normal.

I don't know where they are. Sliding into the nearest armchair, I reflect on what I do know: that they hate me. It's odd; from what I remember of my younger years, they were average parents. They were always occupied with work or my siblings, not leaving much time for me.

Now that I think about it, I don't even know what their jobs were. I don't care either, except that if a ten year old girl can find me, then they probably can too. Which, to be honest, worries me. I don't know these people anymore, I don't so much as care about them, but they still remember me- who I was. They hate me for who I've become.

What have I become? Am I a 'hero' like my friends? I don't know. I belong where I am, though- wherever that is. Maybe if I had longer than my remaining eleven months, I could find who I should be. What would I be doing with my life if I didn't have to leave so soon? Danny would still have to go to K'un L'un to become king, so perhaps this is for the better. There are not many true choices to make, honestly. Why should I keep bothering about this anymore? It won't matter when I'm gone, after all, and eleven months isn't nearly as long a time as it sounds.

What should I do with my life? How do I want to be remembered?

The closer death is, the more you value life. It makes every moment golden, every second unbelievably precious.

I don't know what I want to do. There are things I like to do. Really, though, all I have ever wanted is to simply _live_, and that is, ironically, just about the only thing I cannot do. I want to help make others' lives better, but I don't know how.

Maybe I should try making up with my family. They aren't my family anymore, though. They never cared for me until now, so why should I start caring all of the sudden? The reason I left them in the first place was to protect them. I couldn't control myself at all- not that I am much better now than I was then.

I don't know if I can make up with them. Some things just can't be forgiven, and trust isn't exactly handed out like candy; it's earned. Only time can heal certain wounds- but it has been years. It has been so much easier just to push them away, to tell myself that just because they share my blood doesn't mean we're 'family', solely that we are related.

Why did Abigail try to find me at all? She must have been desperate to come looking for somebody she had never known, somebody who may have been dead for all she knew. Very desperate. My heart pangs with regret, but I don't want to try finding her again. I don't want to face any of them ever again. It wouldn't do any good; the likelihood of them forgiving me seems slim, and, in any case, I don't have enough time left. Chances are that it would take me months to find each person, not to mention that I don't think I'm in the best position to travel.

If my mutation had been controllable, though, and I hadn't run away, where would I be now? I would have lived a true childhood- or maybe not. Either way, I would have been the odd one out, and my parents would not have had any more time for me than previously. I might not have met Danny. He might have died- he probably would have. Although he wouldn't be blind- but being blind is better than dying (in my opinion, anyway). I wouldn't have a family. Those people- they didn't ever treat me like family. I don't think my parents have ever cared about me until now; I would have grown up alone and ignorant to the world around me.

Maybe this is for the best. I don't like it, but I can't change it. Perhaps I should have helped Abigail, but I don't know how. I can't even control my own mutation, and the protection I have to offer is utter rubbish- look at what happened to Danny. I wouldn't be around long for her, and then she would be amongst complete strangers, alone. What fate have I doomed her to as it is? This is exactly why I want to leave my relatives alone, leave their problems as their problems and my problems as my problems.

I'm still scared to die. Why? Why me? It's a question that I can't stop asking myself. I know why I have to die, but that doesn't make it fair, or make me happy and willing. In many ways, I am selfish for thinking about it this way- how can you weigh one person's life against existence?

A funny, random thought occurs to me, and I laugh aloud. What if this is how all the big bangs occur? The idea is laughable, silly, and rather impossible, but nevertheless, I have to laugh at the irony.

"Why are you laughing?" Danny asks, walking into the living room.

I pause, feeling awkward. "Oh, nothing."

"Nothing being funny? Who was at the door?"

Rats- the doorbell is loud, and I guess that he could hear it from wherever in the house he was. "Um... just a girl."

"Who was this... girl?"

"Abigail."

"Who is Abigail?"

I sigh. "Nobody."

"Nobody can make you sound so worried?" I can hear the concern echoing in Danny's calm voice.

"Danny, she's just one of my sisters, okay? And she's gone, now. To Xavier's."

"Xavier's?"

"You know, the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters. Where I went for awhile."

"You have been there?" Danny asks, surprised.

"Yes, I've been to a lot of places, okay?" I snap testily.

He frowns. "What is wrong?"

"A lot is wrong right now, and I can't make any of it right! I'm going to _die_, and I don't even know what to do anymore. What am I supposed to do, sit around here and wait? It's too late to start living!"

"It is never too late to start over again." He pauses. "Emma, this is hard for you, I know."

I'm nearly yelling now. "No, you don't know, Danny! There's a difference between knowing and understanding, and I don't think you _know_ what it feels like to see the end so close. I've been this way for years, not knowing when the end was- just that it would be soon- and now I know! It's one thing to have lived and know you're dying, but I _haven't _lived, only a few short months. I've spent my whole life preparing for the end, Danny, and you've spent yours preparing to be a king! THERE'S A PRETTY BIG DIFFERENCE THERE!"

"Yes," Danny says simply.

"YOU THINK?! I'm tired of being this way, constantly trying my best, but it's not enough- not enough to live, anyways. _I was born to die! _It hurts to think that I'm not worth keeping around, but idiots like the Trapster are! I deserve to die, but Dr. Doom and Doc Ock don't?"

"Perhaps you are the only one worthy to die, the only person strong enough to bear such a burden," he replies softly. I stare at him, my eyes filling with tears at his gentle voice. "Do you think I _want_ to watch you die? You seemed to have accepted your fate, and said you were ready to live, so I am trying my best to aid you."

The waterworks start. _Why am I crying so much?_ I sit there on the chair, feeling stupid; ignorant; weak- hating myself as I rock back and forth. Danny stands there sadly, until the tears have slowed enough for me to hoarsely whisper, "What did you tell them?"

"I informed them that you would be coming to K'un L'un with me. Ava demanded why, and I said that the reasons were yours to tell."

"I haven't talked to her in days... she's always studying, and says she doesn't have time to talk," I whisper. "Oh, Danny. I have to tell them."

**(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))**

That night, Danny orders pizza that arrives right as our friends come back. Mrs. Parker is gone once more, mountain climbing again (apparently it's a "3 month reunion"). Everyone is laughing and talking around me as we eat in the living room, and I faintly try to join in. My bitter, unsaid words gnaw away guiltily in my gut, and my voice quivers whenever I try to talk with one of my teammates. Truthfully, I am only half paying attention to the conversation (and completely ignoring the burping competition between Peter and Sam) as I try to figure out how to explain.

Comfortingly, Danny slips an arm around my shoulder- which Sam does not fail to loudly point out. Danny doesn't move his arm, though, just shrugging away the others' laughter and teasing words. He carefully redirects the conversation to our families (a touchy point for everyone), and then to K'un L'un, telling them when he is leaving. They know something is up, though, because Danny doesn't normally say much at dinner, preferring to listen and occasionally interject as the peacekeeper with one of his 'fortune cookie' remarks.

"So, Em, are you leaving with him too, then?" Sam asks, his mouth full of half chewed pizza.

"Yes," I reply carefully.

Ava frowns. "Why?"

Danny squeezes me, and I manage to keep my voice from quavering as I say, "To sleep."

Sam, Luke, and Ava look puzzled, but a look of understanding dawns on Peter's face, his eyes widening. "Wait- what kind of sleep? Like the Sleeping Beauty sleep, or the regular sleep, or the dying kind of sleep?"

"'Sleeping Beauty sleep'?" I laugh, trying to make light of the situation. They all know my answer immediately from my high-pitched voice, though.

"What, _what_?" Ava demands. "You're not going to _die. _Why would _that_ happen?"

I can't meet her eyes anymore. Peter is gaping at me, and I realize with a sinking feeling that maybe he doesn't dislike me as much as I thought. Kind of like Snape in Harry Potter. Luke's eyebrows are raised, and Sam has stopped eating altogether, glancing from me, to Ava, to Peter, to Danny, and back again. "It's for the best," I admit.

"What the _hell_, Emma?!"

"Okay, look, maybe I haven't been completely honest about my mutation."

"Ya think?" Luke snorts.

I sigh. How, exactly, do you say that you're born to destroy the entire universe plus anything else that may exist? I glance into Danny's beautiful, unseeing green eyes, though, and find the strength to continue. "I've known for years that I'd have to die, but I didn't know when, so there wasn't a reason to tell you guys. I just sorta wanted to live, you know?"

Ava looks at me with utter disbelief. "What do you mean? Why on earth would you think that you have to do this?"

"I _know_ I have to do it; I've known for years, Ava," I say, trying to stay calm. "I have to die because I can't control my mutation. It just gets more and more powerful. I was born to destroy everything. But that would be stupid, to risk everything for my life. So I decided that I was born to die."

Sam's eyes widen suddenly, and I remember him talking about his 'other team' a few times. I assume that he must know something about this.

I take a deep breath in and continue. "I'm going with Danny to die in K'un L'un. He says it's beautiful and peaceful, and I want to see it before I die. I used to want to travel the world, you know," I reminisce wistfully.

"What's stopping you?" Luke says in disbelief.

"I don't travel well..."

Ava growls. "_Why are you going to K'un L'un then_?!"

"Because that's, you know, the end. I won't have to worry about... stuff."

"You shouldn't have to die."

"Life's not fair. You think I like this? You think that I want to do this?"

"You don't have to do this."

"Yes, I do, Ava."

"No. You. Don't. You're choosing this," Ava hisses, before storming away.

"Is this just some practical joke or something?" Peter breaks the awkward silence with his nervous laughter. "Cuz it's not funny, Em."

Since when does Peter call me 'Em'? He almost never talks to me. Luke answers him before I can, saying, "Dude, does she _look_ like she's kidding?"

Sam shakes his head at me. "Well, this sucks."

"Tell me about it. I'm the one dying, not you."

"Yeah, well, I'm one of the people you're leaving, you know." His bitter words hit home. This is precisely why I shouldn't have found a family; I'm just going to hurt them. Just look at what happened to Danny. I'm so selfish, so stupid.

As if Danny can hear my thoughts, he draws me closer until I am sitting in his lap. "All endings are simply new beginnings in disguise," he says quietly to Sam.

I'm surprised that Sam cares so much. Surprised that any of them care. "Don't give me that crap, fortune cookie. She's gonna _die_, and you don't even care."

Danny's grip tightens on me. "Friend, perhaps you should consider how difficult you are making this for her," he says, his words harsh and biting.

"Yeah, well maybe you should learn to care!" Sam half-yells back. I hate this whole conversation, the entire situation.

"I'm sorry!" I cry, standing up. "Don't argue, you guys. It's... fine." I can barely force the words to tumble from my tongue, but they fall smoothly and sound convincing, the way I intended them to be. Danny gentle tugs on my hand, and I collapse back into his lap, suddenly exhausted. I don't know why the lights are flickering, why I feel so dizzy, why the world is spinning, why the blackness is covering me like a thick blanket...

**MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM**

"Well, this just sucks," I hear Sam saying.

Peter sounds completely awed. "She made the electricity go out."

"Well, yeah, Web Brain, electricity is sort of _energy_, you know."

I blink, my head pounding, and try to sit up. The only light is Danny's glowing fist, and I stare, mesmerized, until Danny shakes me.

"What happened?" I ask wanly.

"You, uh, made the lights go out," Peter says.

Sam elaborates. "And the A/C and heat, and microwave, and phones, not to mention-"

"Dude, you shut off the electricity," Luke sums up.

My hands are buzzing. "Or absorbed it," I whisper, mortified. I _used_ my power. Great. This is exactly what I've been trying to avoid. Once I get started, it's hard to stop, and it's only become more difficult of late. The only person who hears me is Danny, and I feel him stiffen beside me.

"Draw the curtains," he commands. I can hear one of the boys stumbling towards the window, but before he can reach it, they jerk back of their own accord. I shake my hands anxiously, shivering.

"What the-?" Sam says.

"No, no, no," I tell myself, but my hands are shaking, full of energy. Outside, I can see the entire block has gone dark. It's a stormy day, but the lightning and thunder are gone. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the ringing. I feel Danny scoop me up.

"Breath. In... out. In... out... in... out..." he says calmly, and I obey, trying to concentrate on my breathing. In... out. In... out... in... out...

On each out, I gradually let a little bit go, until I feel relatively normal (as in, I feel like I just drank ten cups of coffee while on runner's high after eating a few bucketfuls of sugar).

"Wait, what? The lights are back?" Sam sounds absolutely bewildered.

"That," I gasp, "was a complete accident, simple for me as slipping on one of Peter's tools and falling, and is _exactly _why I have to go. I don't even know how I'm going to last eleven more months."

"You will," Danny says firmly, and oh, do I want to believe him.

Ava storms in. "I was _studying_. What the fu-"

"Shut up," Peter advises her (a dangerous thing to say to an angry Ava, and I briefly admire him). Ava glares at all of us, then stomps back upstairs. I do _not_ want to go in there tonight.

"So yeah," I say, blinking back the unbidden tears. "That's why... I'm so-" Before I can finish my sentence, Danny kisses me, and I find myself in his arms, passionately kissing him back, until we need to breath and are forced to break apart. I grin and Luke, Peter, and Sam, not bothering to feel embarrassed. Danny's lips on mine just feel so completely _right _in this messed up world, and I'm tired of holding back. If Danny wants to kiss me, if he wants to love me, then I'm going to love him back with all my heart for the rest of my life. It's not fair to either of us to fall in love, but if Danny is willing, then I'm going all the way- it's not like I can _stop_ feeling this way.

"Since when are you two-" Peter sputters.

Danny chuckles. "A long time, my friend. Perhaps it is time you two settle your differences and learn to get along." Both Peter and I blush, shuffling our feet.

"Sorry," he says.

"I'm sorry too," I admit.

"What on earth is this world coming to? Is the universe ending?" Ava gasps dramatically from the corner.

"Not while she's alive," Peter ventures, and I find myself laughing at his stupid pun, and everyone joins in. Yes, this is where I belong, with my family. My crazy, insane, superhero, annoying, awesome family.


	21. Fritz

**Thank you for the reviews, TheOnyxDragon12, BowTies23, & leggo lover 99!**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC's and the idea.**

**Chapter 21: Fritz**

"_**Learn to focus only on the present.**_

_**The past is unchangeable **_

_**so it is futile to reflect on it unless you are making sure you so not repeat past mistakes.**_

_**The future is but a result of your actions today.**_

_**So learn from the past**_

_**to do better in the present**_

_**so that you can succeed in the future."**_

_**-Jordan Lejuwaan**_

I yawn. Ten more months. I really should stop counting down, but I know that all my friends are too, and it's hard not to. Peter decided to tell his aunt I'm dying of a rare genetic disease- which is close enough to the truth. Mrs. Parker has offered to bring me with her and Sam on some of her 'adventures', and I've done a few things that don't require traveling. Ava talks with me much more than before, but how can you fit a lifetime of friendship into a few final months? Danny does Kundalini with me every night. It's gentle enough to prevent me from getting overexcited, but, at the same time, is refreshing, challenging, and enjoyable. Taekwondo, though, makes me way over the top, so I don't practice that very often anymore. I really miss practicing martial arts, but at least I can use it whenever I go on a mission.

I drowsily slip two slices of bread into the toaster, but as soon as I touch the handle to start it, it begins to emit sparks and smoke, so I decide against eating breakfast. Lately that has been happening to me whenever I touch electronic devices; let's just say that the city has had very faulty power lately.

"Morning," Peter mutters, walking into the kitchen. I giggle; he is covered in some sort of scented green wax.

"Sam?"

"Don't know. I think these are Danny's candles, though."

"Were."

Peter lays his head on the table. "I'm dead."

I shrug, then say, "Danny won't mind that much. I mean, they're expensive, but Danny never seems to care."

"Like Danny would care about money, Em, really? No, I ruined Ava's shirt..."

My eyebrows shoot up. "You _are_ dead."

"And Luke's 'beauty kit'..."

"Double dead..."

"... and this old book called "Dairy Firm Grills..."

"Oh, you are _dead!_" I exclaim, punching on the arm. "That thing had better be okay!"

Peter's eyes widen in alarm, and suddenly makes a break for it, dashing back to his bedroom, only to run into Ava. I roll my eyes at them when I hear them half flirting, half arguing.

"What's burning?" Luke crinkles his nose as he, Danny, and Sam enter the kitchen.

"Oops..." I blush.

"Not the microwave!" Sam cries, before noticing the toaster and visibly relaxing. "Oh, just that piece of junk. It's useless for actually toasting anything, you know. I mean, it was useless _before_ Em fried it."

"EMMA FRIED THE TOASTER?!" Peter shouts from the top of the stairs.

"SORRY!" I yell back. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Danny slip two folded bills underneath the toaster, and shame builds in my stomach. "Danny-"

"What?" he replies innocently.

"Those two-" I say, before Danny presses a finger to my lips, shushing me with his grin. "Oh, fine." Instead of moving away to fix himself some breakfast, though, Danny moves in closer, until we are pressed against each other in a tucked away corner of the room, away from our friends' prying eyes, and our lips meet.

"Hey, Danny, where did you put my-" Luke starts to ask, before realizing that Danny is, well, kissing me. "Dude, really? Before breakfast?"

"What before breakfast?" Sam inquires, stepping in front of Luke.

"Peace."

Sam snorts. "Peace? Really? For what?"

"Oh, nothing at all, Sam," I say, hurrying away, because I know that within the next minute or so, he will put two and two together, and the teasing shall begin.

Yes, life is good. I love this feeling of being apart of something, of taking place in the daily squabbles. For most of the morning, I read a book that Ava recommended to me called "_Thundering Hearts__"_, a rather funny romance.

Later that day, after lunch, Danny approaches me again. "Hello," he greets me warmly.

"Hey Danny. Whatcha doing?" I snap the book shut and set it aside, glad he doesn't know what I was reading.

Danny shrugs, an amused smile lingering on his lips. I haven't ever seen Danny being 'mischievous' before, but... oh, well. "Simply talking to you."

"Well, yeah, I can see that," I roll my eyes.

He grins back as he says, "I was unaware that one could see sounds."

"Oh, stop it!" I give him a playful shove, but at my touch, Danny flinches.

"What is wrong?" he asks me in an undertone.

My eyebrows shoot up. "Nothing... what is it, Danny?" I cannot hide the concern in my voice.

"Your hands... why are you shaking them like that?"

I shrug. Lately I have had a habit of waving my hands around and wiggling my fingers, because the energy has a tendency to build up otherwise. "Just cuz." He frowns at me, then shakes his head. I sigh, then say, "Danny, could we do some yoga? Please?"

I know that he realizes that something is wrong, but Danny isn't one to pry, and simply nods, starting to Peter's bedroom, where he already has two yoga mats laying on the floor. As we stretch, Danny breaks the silence. "Here." He holds out my necklace.

It's hard to believe that he has kept it all this time. Why didn't he give it back? I don't want it anymore, though, and carefully close his hand around the necklace, pushing it back towards him. "No. I don't need it anymore. Keep it."

Danny pauses. "Where did you get this? It is very valuable; I have only seen one other of this kind."

"Doctor Strange. He told me it contains the 'magic woven through the universe' and takes advantage of that. I don't know what kind of stone it is, but it used to help."

"Used to?"

"Yeah. Not anymore... It just stopped working- it used to absorb energy, which helped a lot at times... It stopped working when I found you, but I kept on wearing it because I've had it since I was seven."

Danny closes his eyes, thinking. "How did you find the Sorcerer Supreme?"

"You mean Dr. Strange? He found me. I was... in a mess, and he said that I'd been using magic and wanted to know where I'd learned it. I explained that I'd dreamed about how to do it," I say slowly. Even though I'm with Danny, I still avoid telling the whole truth. Not because I'm worried about myself; I have little to be concerned about when I have so little time remaining- rather, there are people involved that would be hurt. More than hurt- this information is so precious, no living person other than myself and Dr. Strange knows it.

"You Dream?" Danny sounds concerned, and he's usually quite good at keeping a neutral tone. Worry begins to pool in my stomach.

"Who doesn't dream?" I ask, my voice becoming slightly high pitched.

"No. You Dream-walk using magic."

So that's what this is called. "I guess. Well, not really- but I always- Oh, I don't know!"

"Dream-walking is an ancient art gifted to but a few. Where did you learn the techniques?" Danny says gravely.

Neither of us are in a pose any more, or a stretch. We're both just sitting there, with me staring into Danny's eyes. His blind eyes. Guilt settles uneasily in my stomach, and I feel myself starting to blush. "I... I don't know. I always had dreams about stuff, but they just kept getting more vivid and stronger, if you know what I mean... I always thought it was my mutation, you know, causing it."

Danny stands up, and holds out his hand. "Come. You and I need to talk." My heart jumps nervously, but I grasp his hand, pulling myself up. He leads me downstairs, then right down the sidewalk. After six blocks or so, I start to worry; are we just going to walk the whole way? As it turns out, we do. Danny's pace is steady and unwavering, and I have to keep pulling him away from the street.

"Danny! Watch out!" I exclaim, yanking on his arm as he nearly walks into a passing taxi. "Where are we going?"

"Patience."

We eventually arrive at an old, beat-up building. As we walk closer, though, it shifts into an enormous house, headed by stone gargoyles. I can't help but letting out a little gasp despite the fact that I've been here once before. Inside, the hallways is precisely as I remember it, decorated with various 'spooky' relics. A man with a black mustache and goatee appears from the shadows, wearing a royal red and gold vest, stiff white polo, and shiny black pants. His eyes are a startling pale, stormy gray.

"Greetings, Iron Fist and Emmaline." His voice is regal and commanding, echoing throughout the corridor.

"Namaste, Doctor," Danny bows.

I follow his example. "Namaste."

"What brings you here? Emmaline, after your last... _visit_, I was under the impression that you would not return."

I mutter something under my breath, redirecting my gaze to the ground. "I wasn't going to. Danny brought me here."

"You have fared... well. Far better than I expected, Emmaline. What is your secret to holding back?"

I wring my hands uncomfortably. Dr. Strange has a knack for knowing what I think, how I'm doing. He still wouldn't help me, though, not in the way I needed. Even after all these years, Dr. Strange still remembers me. I wouldn't have ever intentionally come back here again, truthfully, and I wouldn't have followed Danny at all if I had known where he was bringing me; now it is too late to turn back. I open my mouth to answer the doctor's question, but he waves his hand to quiet me.

"Iron Fist, I had not expected you to find love. Not that you should not have, but I was unaware that the Monks would allow it. Although she shares an extraordinarily similar spirit to yours. I did not expect your paths to cross."

"What in this world is ever expected, Doctor?"

"True, Daniel, true," Dr. Strange strokes his goatee thoughtfully. "Emmaline, you dare to become close to another? Again, unexpected. Then again, you have always defied the laws of reality, so why should you follow the beaten pathways? In all aspects, you are a miracle of life. Speaking of such, how is your life faring?"

"Ten more months," I say in a hushed voice.

"Ten? Why would you reject-"

"Stop." No. Doctor Strange is _not_ telling Danny about my other Choice. The risks aren't worth it, why won't Doctor Strange accept that? I know my friends would never let it rest if they found out. "No. You know my answer, Sorcerer."

Danny's face betrays his surprise, but, true to his nature, he says nothing.

"Then, what brings you here?"

"She can Dream," Danny says.

"Dream? Where did you learn this ancient art?"

I am about to explode from frustration. Literally. My hands are quivering, and I anxiously shake them back and forth, trying to rid myself of the excess energy. "I said, I don't know!"

Dr. Strange's eyes darken. "Explain yourself, Hayat Ruh."

_Hayat Ruh_. The words ring through my mind. It's been so long since anyone has called me that, and I'd nearly forgotten, but the words are still true. _Hayat Ruh_. "Why?"

"Do it," Danny commands.

Something inside of me tumbles down, and I say, "I've always dreamed that way. I thought it was how everyone dreamed when I was little. I thought everybody saw others' dreams. Then I saw... a _special_ dream about Dream-walking, and I suppose that reflected upon me, and I started dreaming about others' memories and fates; pasts, present, and futures. I can't control it, okay? I'm sorry!"

"Emma... that in itself is... extraordinary." Danny's face is calm, but his words convey his awe. I hate this, I hate always being the 'not normal' person in whatever I do.

Dr. Strange examines me curiously. "Say what you will, Hayat Ruh, but you have gleaned much control as of recent days. Why you claim the card of death when there is a deck of cards spread before you is a mystery. Only you would do so. Yet only you have that decision."

"Stop it!" I say angrily, fury welling up inside of me. He has no right to judge my choices.

"As you wish, Hayat Ruh. Let me inform you, though, that Uzun Uyku holds little risk for you if your words are honest."

Danny interjects. "You have been given the choice of Uzun Uyku?"

"Yeah, but it's too risky, and I've already said no! I don't trust you, _Doctor_, not with this. Nobody can be trusted with this this, and that's why I have to die. I don't want to go into Uzun Uyku; I don't want to place that burden on anybody's shoulders," I say venomously.

"You would not entrust me?" Danny asks quietly.

"I trust you just fine, Danny! That's not it! You don't _deserve_ to do that for me, it's too much to ask-"

"You do not deserve to die."

"What if I do?!" I am nearly screaming at him now. He can't do this for me. No. "You said yourself: '_What if you are the only person who deserves to die?_'!"

"You know that I did not mean it in such a way. I meant it as a compliment to your inner value."

"Enough!" Dr. Strange waves his hands, and we both fall into silence instantly. "If Hayat Ruh objects to Uzun Uyku, then you must accept this, Iron Fist. The decision is hers alone, and perhaps her choices are for the better."

I turn away, trying to blink away my tears. "We need to go, Danny," I say thickly, and start for the door. From the footsteps behind me, I know that he is following me back to Peter's home. The whole way back, I am mute.

That night, while Sam is making dinner, Danny pulls me aside. Everyone else is talking and laughing in the living room.

"Emma, please, Uzun Uyku is your best option." I've never heard Danny plead before, and I feel terrible that he wants this for me so badly, but the decision was made years ago. A lifetime ago, really.

"No, Danny."

He raises his voice, "Emmaline, Uzun Uyku-"

"NO!"

Ava puts her hand on my shoulder from behind me, but I shove her away. "Em, what's wrong?"

Danny's eyebrows lower, and his entire face portrays anger. "She is choosing death over Uzun Uyku. She is deaf to my arguments."

"Oo-Zen Oye Coo?" Sam asks. Why is everybody walking over here? Danny and I fighting isn't _that_- oh, who am I kidding? Danny and I almost never argue, preferring Yoga over fiery words.

"What the hell is Uzun Uyku?" Luke exclaims in his deep, caring voice.

"It means '_long sleep_'," Danny says in an undertone.

I interrupt him. "It's a magical sleep."

"It could save your life."

"It could destroy yours."

"I am willing."

"I'm not!"

"Please- the Sorcerer Supreme himself said there is nearly no risk-"

Peter laughs nervously. "Well, if that nut job says it's 'safe', then it's probably about the most dangerous thing you could do!" Danny's eyes narrow in anger, and Peter gulps loudly. "Uh, oops?"

"No, Peter, you're right. Doctor Strange is no 'nut job', but what he considers 'safe' could destroy _everything_," I say. My words are bitter even on my tongue, but they taste no better when I spit them out, lingering in the silence.

"The risk is minute."

"Any risk at all is too much," I say, turning my back to Danny. "My life isn't worth it."

"We- your family- are not worth the risk? Life is merely a series of risks, and if you take no risks, you do not live!"

"Exactly. I take no risk, and I do not live," I whisper, a single, lonely tear sliding down my cheek. "That is my choice, on how I shall die. There are far worse things in life than death itself."

"No there aren't!" Sam exclaims. I turn to face him, looking him in the eyes so he can see my sorrow.

"Life once asked Death, _'Why do people love me but hate you?'_ Death replied, _'Because you are a beautiful lie and I am an ugly truth.' _I prefer the truth over lies, Sam. Death is blunt and honest, while Life encircles you in its beautiful, glittering web of lies. Everyone dies, and each for different reasons. Some people die prematurely, yet others know when it is there time. I know that I will die, and I know when I will die. I have ten months of Life remaining, and I will forever treasure those, but I do not want to leave my family with only painful memories of the end. I want you to have the luxury of believing that I was ready to go, and died with ease, not drawing it out to a painful end. I would rather cut it off cleanly than suffer until the last possible moment; I will make the best of the quality of life that I have, for the golden days that life remains."

Sam stares at me, his face pale.

"Nice fortune cookie talk," Peter supplies. I whirl to face him, blazing with anger.

"_Shut up, you ignorant little-_" I stop myself before I go too far, storming off.

The world is suddenly red, spinning everywhere, and it's going out of focus. Why is it so blurry? I feel myself falling backwards, towards the floor, but someone catches me first. I blink, and the room slowly starts to appear before me, and I see Danny's stoic face above mine.

"Careful," he warns me as he sets me down. I shake my head at him, starting to walk upstairs when Danny grabs my hand, swinging my around to face him. Guiltily, I look into his eyes, but find I cannot hold his empty gaze. "Why do you choose this?" he whispers.

"It's not worth the risk. I'm not worth the risk."

"The risk is nearly nothing," Danny murmurs sadly. "It is not the risk that concerns you, is it?"

"No," I admit. "I don't want to make anybody bear that burden. You know that."

"I am willing."

"I'm not. I trust you, but I don't want you to have to do this. There's no guarantee it would work, Danny," I whisper, and Danny envelopes me in a hug. I bury my face into his chest as though hiding from the consequences of my choices will make them disappear if I wait long enough.

"Why won't you try?" he asks, lifting my chin up.

"No. I've said no, and it'll stay that way."

Danny looks sad, and I hate myself for making him feel this way, but this is the best choice I have. "It is your choice, then," he says softly, and I hug him tighter.

Suddenly, our coms begin beeping. "Mission time." Hastily, we suit up. On the way there, we join up with the rest of the team.

"You _really_ need to come up with a code name, Em," Peter informs me from his as he swings on his webbing from building to building.

"She already has one," Danny shouts over the wind. "Hayat Ruh!"

I glare at him. I hate that name, but I know the meaning, and it fits me. No matter how much I dislike its connotation, it is true. I hear Peter laughing at me. "Shut up, Web Brain!"

"Why should I, _Hat Ra?_ Isn't Ra like the Egyptian god of the moon or something?"

I roll my eyes. "Hayat Ruh! And _Ra_ is the Egyptian god of the _sun_."

"Whatever," Peter shouts back. Sam is circling above us, bored. He and Peter are the fastest- hey, it's not exactly the quickest form of transportation to run on foot to every crime scene, which is exactly what Danny, Luke, Ava and I have to do.

"What excuse did you give your aunt for missing dinner again?" Ava says.

Peter shrugs back at her. "I... uh... forgot to tell her?"

"That's just great, Web Head!"

I mentally face palm. After what Peter told Mrs. Parker about me 'dying of a genetic disease' she tends to fuss a bit over me. Not to mention that she always likes to know where her nephew is. Sam's jealous of Peter, and to be frank, I am a bit too; it wouldn't be bad to have someone like that around, who cares so much. I have Danny, though, and my friends; they're worth more than anything else to me.

Danny stumbles and trips. I immediately stop to help him up, but he just moans, clutching at his back. "WAIT! GUYS, WAIT!" They turn around, and see me kneeling beside Danny. "Danny, what's wrong? Are you okay?!" Admittedly, I am starting to panic a little bit.

"Can't- breathe-" he gasps, and my eyes widen in horror. Sam and Peter are close enough to hear him, and they speed up. I can see Ava suddenly halt, growling, before pouncing on Luke and attacking him. Sam's hands fly up to his helmet, and I watch him fall, as if in slow motion, to the street, then go limp. Peter is nearly here, though, swinging from web to web as fast as he possibly can.

Not fast enough. The bomb blows up before he can get to us.

**MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM**

**Finished! Sorry for the delay. :-/ **

**-FFS**


	22. All Who Fly Will Fall

**Thanks for the review:**

**TheOnyxDragon12: No, not yet; the Cyanide didn't blind him, it was the liquid that Doc Ock spilled on his face- the Cyanide just made him faint and made it hard to breathe. Yes, though she has gone nuts on him...**

**leggo lover 99: * blush * Aw, thanks. =)**

**Hamster1000: Ah, I see you actually bothered to log in! Where are your priorities, gal?**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC's.**

**Chapter 22: All Who Fly Will Fall**

"_**The ultimate tragedy**_

_**is not the brutality**_

_**of the bad people**_

_**but the silence**_

_**of the good people."**_

_**-Martin Luther King, Junior**_

_Do you know what one of the worst feelings in the world is?_

_Failure._

_Not that you have failed yourself, but that you have failed others in some fatal way. Death. There are worse things, I tell myself, than dying, but what is worse than the death of friend or family?_

_I absorbed the force. Not all of it. Just that directed at Danny and I. He only survived because I was touching him. Do you know what a frightening thought that is? My fingertip had brushed against his skin at the very moment it exploded, and that saved his life. _

_At least the bomb was right in front of us, and I took the worst of the force. It still was a bomb, though. It still exploded. Twelve civilians dead. All my fault. My friends injured. Whoever planned this attack had thought every detail out completely- but my father has always been thorough. _

_I bang my head against the back of the waiting chair. It is the soft kind that they reserve for the sorry, pitiful people that know those who are nearly dead, so different from the hard, plastic chairs of the regular waiting rooms- far more comfortable, yet I would give everything just to be waiting in a plastic chair, or, better yet, not waiting here for news at all._

_Already, I know that Luke is all right, as is Danny. Luke is injured, yes, but he is not in the ICU like Sam, Peter, and Ava. He simply needs time to heal. His impervious skin really saved him this time. From what I have been told, he collapsed on top of Ava, saving her life. Sam fell. A very, very long ways. Then he had to bear the explosion. He is only alive because he was unconscious, and his muscles were relaxed, allowing him to better absorb the impact. It didn't save him from the debris, though. _

_Waiting. Alone._

_I shudder. The hospital is a terrible place for me to wait; I can sense so many people, many of them giving off negative energy. I hate this feeling of not knowing, not being in control. Three days of waiting really starts to wear on a girl, as does sleeping in a waiting chair, no matter how comfortable the chair itself may be._

_My hair hangs, uncombed, framing my hollow face. How little hope there is. Nick has not even taken the time to talk to me yet, which means that things are bad. Really, really bad. _

_A doctor approaches me, clipboard in hand. I read her name tag: Shannon Page. Feeling hollow and hopeless, I shake her hand._

"_Hello, Ms. Carlson. I understand you have been waiting for news on your friends." Bleakly, I nod. "Well, I have it right here._

"_Your boyfriend, Mr. Daniel Rand, is faring well, considering his extensive chest and lung injuries. We have him on a machine to help him breathe, and he is still weak, but we believe you should be able to visit him soon._

"_Mr. Luke Cage is healing quite nicely, but he has a broken leg. You should be able to visit him later this morning._

"_Ms. Ava Ayala is currently in Intensive Care, as you know. We have found... extensive internal injuries. Hopefully one of the doctors in that unit should be able to talk to you soon._

"_Mr. Peter Parker is also in the ICU, on life support. Only direct family members may know more at present._

"_Mr. Sam Alexander is beginning to heal, though he will remain in ICU. Hopefully we should be able to get back to you soon." With a crisp nod, Dr. Page turns to leave._

_Hoarsely, I say, "Wait. You can't tell me any more than that they're alive?" She nods._

"_You are not a member of their direct family."_

"_Most of them don't have any direct family any more," I hiss at the woman. This is not her fault, but somehow, I still blame her. _

_She clears her throat uncomfortably. "Well, yes, be as that may, we cannot change the rules."_

_I feel energy pulsing through me that has no where to go, and my hands buzz. I think that I'm starting to glow, but I am beyond caring. "I don't care about your flipping rules, doctor," I say venomously. "You don't anything about these people, you don't care. I'm sick of waiting. I want to help; I want to see these people- because these people are my family."_

_Dr. Page backs away, her cheeks flushed. "I- I do suppose we could manage to arrange a visit between you and Mr. Cage, as well as you and Mr. Rand," she stutters._

_Within the next hour, I find myself being escorted to a room. A private hospital room, one floor above where I had been waiting, holds Danny. My Danny. Numbly, I walk through the doorway, collapsing into the visitor's chair beside the hospital bed._

_Danny lies there limply, surrounded by various devices. An IV is connected to his arm, and a ventilator helps him breathe. In, out. In, out. Next to all of the equipment, my strong Danny seems weak, and helpless, so small. My words catch in my throat, and tears well up in my eyes. If Danny is 'faring well', then Peter must be on the verge of death. Carefully, I extend a single hand to brush the hair from his face. _

_A few limp fingers twitch upwards, and I grasp his hand in mine. Danny weakly squeezes my hand back, and the tears begin to make rivers down my cheeks as my heart swells. "I'm sorry," I choke._

_I truly am. None of this should have happened._

_Danny does not move. I can feel the effort that each breathe takes him, and I sit there, mentally keeping time. One... two... one... two... one... two..._

"_Don't touch me," the girl hissed, but her captors, grinning maliciously, circled around her like enormous birds of prey, ready to pounce. They kept time to the Drum, darting in and out on each beat, their knives stinging like overgrown wasps._

_The Drum quickened, and so did the men. In, out, in-out-in-out, in, out, boom-boom-boom-boom, bum, boom, boom-boom-boom-boom._

_A hand shakes me, and I drowsily open my eyes. Nick's eye meets mine, and I bolt up._

"_What happened? What's going on?"_

"_Shut up, Carlson. Let me start from the beginning."_

"_What beginning?" I laugh coldly. "You don't know the half of it."_

"_Well, it would certainly help if you'd tell us what the hell happened to you as a kid."_

"_Give me a reason I should trust you. A really good reason. Not just that you've trusted me- you haven't- or that you've protected me and done all the things you do to gain somebody's trust- you haven't done that either."_

_Nick gives me a long look, then says, "The man behind this is a madman, but an utter genius. That entire mission was a fraud, a trap to lure the team to the right place at the right time. He must have had ingenious contacts, because they knew everyone's weaknesses."_

"_Ingenious? More like traitors, stalkers, thieves, liars," I spit._

"_Whatever they are, they knew White Tiger's 'wild' side, and made her attack Luke."_

_Luke would never hurt Ava. No wonder. "Maybe they contacted Kraven?"_

"_That shouldn't have been possible."_

_Bitterly, I chuckle. "This entire thing shouldn't have been possible."_

"_It was, though," Nick says. "They infiltrated Nova's helmet. Another used magic on Danny. Peter was hurrying to help you, and took on a lot of the force from the explosion. They knew and expected this result. They wanted someone. They knew that someone's weaknesses."_

_Me._

_Contrary to Nick's belief, though, these people do not want to kill me. They want to break me._

I wake up, in cold sweat. Please let that have been a dream, please. Cautiously, I open my eyes to find that I am in a hospital room, lying in a hospital bed.

Ava leans over me. "Hey, you're awake!"

"What- what happened?"

Sam shrugs. "Oh, you just, um, absorbed the energy of an entire bomb!"

Wait, what?! "What the heck is going on?!" I sputter in disbelief. "You guys are okay? Did I fall into a coma or something while all of you healed?"

Sam, Ava, Peter, and Luke stare blankly at me. "Uh... Em, you and Danny are the only two who got hurt..." Ava trails off.

"Is he okay?!" I exclaim in alarm.

The four of them exchange glances. "Depends on what your definition of 'okay' is," Peter supplies.

My stomach plummets. I jump out of bed. "What room is he in?"

"I, uh, don't think you're supposed to get up..." Sam trails off at my glare. "Right next door. But we can't see him yet."

I sink back into the bed. Why, why? I don't understand what is happening. "You mean I absorbed _all _of the energy? Seriously? Then why did I have that bizarre Dream?" At my friends' looks of confusion, I realize that I actually said the last part aloud. "Uh, oops- I need to talk to Danny, or the Sorcerer Supreme- could someone _please_ explain what happened?"

Ava shrugs. "The bomb went off, you absorbed it, Danny and you went to the hospital while the rest of us kicked some bad guys' booties," Peter says.

"There were people at the scene? I mean, my dad was there?"

"What the hell? Your dad?"

I sigh. Why is my tongue so loose right now? "I need to talk to Nick."

Sam casually leans against the stark white wall. "One prob with that. Fury hasn't talked to any of us; why'd he decide to talk to you?"

I clench my hands into fists in frustration, then let a breath of air out that I didn't realize I was holding. This isn't their fault. It's mine. Leaving all of these loose ties waving in the wind was bound to cause trouble; I should have contacted my parents somehow, but it just didn't seem worth it. To be honest, it still doesn't. If my parents did cause this (which, despite the fact that I don't think it could be anyone else, is still fairly unlikely, considering that they should be dead), then I doubt that they would want to hold a 'heart-to-heart' conversation and settle our differences. "How long have I been out?"

"Three days."

Swearing under my breath, I dig into my pocket, only to find that I am no longer wearing my uniform, but, rather, a hospital gown. "Where's my uniform?"

"You're not supposed to leave the room. That's about the only orders Fury gave us," Ava says.

"I'm not leaving the stupid room! Just give me my uniform!" Luke hands me a crumpled up pile of clothing, and I rummage through it until I find what I am looking for. A small, rectangular piece of card-stock with a phone number on it. The telephone is beside my bed, and I begin dialing, deaf to my teammates objections.

"Hello, Hayat Ruh."

"What's wrong with Danny?!"

"How should I know?"

"You're magic!"

"Am I?"

"Quit answering my questions with questions!" I shout angrily. "Just tell me why this happened!"

"Have you ever paused to think about the rod S.H.I.E.L.D. removed from his back? I suppose so, but the thought has never occurred to you that it may still render a certain effect on Danny?"

Dr. Strange doesn't mean physically; he means supernaturally, I realize with dread. "Who did this?" I ask thickly.

"I believe you already know."

"What if I don't? What if I can't do things I thought I could before?"

He sighs into the phone. "Who is behind you?"

I drop the telephone, and whirl around to face Brian, letting out a small gasp. "What's wrong?" Ava asks, confused. I realize I am the only one who can see him, of course. He looks exactly the same as he did last time I saw him. Briefly, I wonder if he has changed at all.

"Hello," I greet him softly.

_Time is running out._

"I know."

_Then hurry! You must do it. We have talked about this before, Emma. Why haven't you completed your task yet?_

"I can't."

_What has changed? Why are you so earth-bound? You weren't this way before! You owe me, after all of those years that I protected you. I protected you from the worst spirits, and this is how you repay your debt? By falling for an earthling?_

"He is different. Look."

_Yes, yes he is. He would be able to see me if I were willing. Or perhaps whether I am or am not willing would not matter, simply if he is willing or unwilling. Yet, this does not amend the fact that you are indebted to me. I do not care how long you have to live. You must do as I said. At last, you have heard my story, and now, you must settle my final affairs._

"No-"

_YES!_

"I SAID NO, BRIAN!" I scream at him, and he slinks into the corner, brooding, waiting for the right time to strike again. "I told you, I owe you _nothing_."

"What the-?" Sam asks. I suddenly remember that, of course, my friends are still here, and that they heard our whole conversation.

"Nothing," I say, turning away from Brian. "It's nothing."

"So talking to yourself is nothing?" Peter snorts.

"You can't see him, it doesn't matter."

"Who can't we see?" Sam's eyes dart around the room suspiciously.

"Brian."

"Who on earth is _Brian_?" Ava demands.

"A man."

Peter rolls his eyes. "Wow! I totally thought that 'Brian' was a little girl!"

"Oh, be quiet," I say, lightly punching him on the arm, a faint smile lingering on my lips.

"Seriously, Em, who's Brian?"

I avert my eyes to the floor, wringing my hands uncomfortably. I could tell them; this is not the sort of secret that would endanger anybody except myself, but the truth is, I am worried that they will think that I am insane, and I really don't feel any need to let them know. "You wouldn't understand." I stand to leave. "Let's go back to Peter's."

Peter swallows. "Uh, we can't exactly do that... that was Fury's other order... to stay in here with you and not go back to my house because he's worried that the assassin might target Aunt May- Fury actually removed her from the house because he doesn't think it's safe for anyone to stay there right now..."

"So she knows." It is not a question, simply a statement.

"Yeah." Peter shifts uncertainly.

I sigh. Funny the way everything can be completely turned around in a few fleeting moments. "How bad is Danny?"

Ava looks me in the eyes so that I can see that she is being truthful. "He's all right. Not that bad off, I suppose. I think there's some sort of machine helping him breath. That's it. I think. That's all I got out of the nurses, anyways."

"Where have you been staying these past few days?" I try to redirect the conversation.

Luke gestures to the waiting chairs. "Uh... yeah. Not the best sleeping place..." Peter says.

"So we just have to wait?"

"Pretty much."

The next two days are spent in silence. I am restless, but what is there to do but wait? I try not to worry, without success. At last, on Thursday, a nurse approaches us with actual information.

"You have all been discharged," she says in an unusually high pitched voice, as she herds us out of the building.

"Wait- where are we supposed to go?" We are all still in uniform (I changed yesterday), the Tricarrier was blown up (a story I still need to hear), and we are 'forbidden' from returning to Peter's. The nurse is quite unhelpful, simply shrugging.

Outside of the building, Danny is leaning against the wall, trying to look casual, but not succeeding as his green uniform earns him many odd looks. I run up to him and throw my arms around him in a tight hug. "Are-you-okay?!" I demand breathlessly.

Danny laughs, a smile dancing across his face. "I am fine."

None of us believe him as we start walking down the block, and Danny finds himself already out of breath. Peter insists on him sitting down on the nearest bench and resting for a little bit. People do double-takes at us, pointing and staring, then whispering in hushed voices, "Look! Spider-Man!" or "Are those superheros?! I think that is Power Man, Mummy!". We are all wearing our masks, for the sake of keeping 'secret identities' (not that I much need one, as it seems like plenty of people have been stalking me, judging from the ease that criminals find me).

"Where are we even _going_?" Sam whines.

Everyone looks to Peter, the team leader, who simply shrugs and says, "Uh... how about lunch?"

"Where are your priorities, Web Head?!" Ava exclaims. "Five days ago, somebody tried to blow us all up. The Tricarrier already went Kay-Boom, and who knows what happened to Peter's house if Fury doesn't even want us within six blocks of the place. Danny can hardly breath, we've been sleeping in cruddy plastic chairs for five days, we're dressed up like famous superheroes in the middle of New York City, and you seriously think it's a good idea to walk into a random restaurant and eat _lunch_?!"

"Actually, I was thinking about going to Central Park and getting hot dogs."

"Oh, yeah, and Em _totally _wasn't kidnapped from that place a few months ago by a madman, who then _didn't _capture and torture Danny!" Ava vents.

"Oh... yeah. How about pretzels? See, there's a cart right there, no Central Park needed!"

She fumes, "You don't even realize that we're about a block away from Em's old apartment, do you?"

Peter facepalms. "Can I do anything right?!"

"Uh, no, duh, Web Brains," Sam says. "We all know that _I _should be team leader."

"Dude, not now!" Luke glares at the two of them, who both look as though they are about to attack each other. Peter suddenly freezes up.

"SPIDEY SENSE! MOVE!"

Everybody backs away, and an enormous chunk of rock falls where we were moments ago. Black smoke envelopes us for a moment, and no one can see as we keel to the ground, coughing. Once it clears, though, Danny continues coughing, a terrible, hoarse, heart-wrenching sound, for another minute or so, and I am absorbed with him. When I bother to look up, I see my teammates in a circle around us, in fighting stances, watching in horror as flames lick up the buildings around us, consuming them one by one. The air is dry and hazy, filled with lingering smoke.

"Emmaline."

I whirl around to face Flame. "Go away."

"No." She grin evilly, watching Danny choke on the smoke.

"Shuddup."

"Make me." Flame opens her hand, allowing it to catch fire, then sets it down on the street. "I am here to watch your memories, your life burn away. Like a book where the pages catch fire, all you will have is ashes, and then- well, then, Emmaline, you will die." She closes her eyes, and the flames swell, shooting higher and higher.

I close my eyes, concentrating. Now is the Time. Time to let go.


	23. How Could You Hold On?

**Chapter 23: How Could You Hold On?**

"_**Courage is the power to let go of the familiar. **_

_**-Raymond Lindquist**_

The sensation is like an enormous wave crashing over me, then receding back to the ocean. It feels so completely normal, so _right_, kind of like kissing Danny. Just letting the energy flow into me is an utterly natural feeling. I hold it there for an eternity of seconds, the power at my fingertips, and I could roll the balls of energy in my hands if I wanted to. As if I hold the entire world in the palm of my hand; a beautiful, yet frightening notion. Then, I gently let it trickle out. Into the people. So many people. I know each one of them as their faces pass through my memory like some long-lost friends that I have not seen in a while.

These people- they like the feeling. It refreshes and livens them, like placing a little ray of sunshine into their hearts. Many of them are exhausted, each for different reasons, but they all bask in the warmth of their little piece of gold.

At the end, I smile to myself. It was as if I were handing out candy to good friends that I have known my entire life, and now I have none left for myself. I vaguely feel like I am falling, down, down, into darkness.

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_Where am I? This place is beautiful, wherever I am. Perhaps I am dead._

_**I hope not.**_

_Danny steps forward from the shadows, his green eyes reflecting the warm sunshine. I throw my arms around him, kissing him, and oh, this feels so perfect- until we break away, breathless, collapsing onto the meadow grass._

_**Emma. This is a Dream. **_

_I know._

_**You saved them. All of those people. **__Danny shakes his head. __**You are amazing. A miracle. **_

_Tears of happiness well up in my eyes. Oh, Danny..._

_**Would you like to be the Queen of K'un L'un? My queen?**_

_Danny... you know I'll die._

_**Then be the queen while you are there. Please. Just for the time you spend in my homeland, however long that may be.**_

_I roll over to face him, and am pleasantly surprised to see that, in this Dream, Danny is not blind. Our noses touch for a moment, then I find his lips have brushed mine._

_Yes._

_He scoops me up, into his lap, and I laugh. Danny! _

_**What?**_

_Oh, Danny. _

_**Just close your eyes. Sleep for the hour.**_

_Danny carefully shuts my eyelids, and I find myself in a state of drowsiness. How can one sleep while dreaming? I suppose this is a Dream, not a dream, though, and that would be why._

_When I wake, I am still in the beautiful, endless meadow, but it is just past sunset. Danny?_

_**Yes?**_

_Why are you still here?_

_**I am also Dreaming.**_

_You're hurt, I accuse him. I can tell from his face that he is._

_**It was the rod. It left Magic of some sort behind. Black Magic.**_

_Danny. No. You're going to live!_

_**There are no guarantees in life, Emma. You of all people should know that.**_

_Guiltily, I turn away from him. Why? Why can't I help him? The only thing I want is for him to be okay. I don't care if I live or die anymore, just that Danny is happy. Happy and alive._

_**And I would be happy if you were dead?**_

_I don't know what to tell him now. I have to way to help him. I can't even wake up!_

_**You have not tried.**_

_What would be the point? You would be asleep, and I would have to explain to Nick how I did manage to use my powers without destroying just about everything. He won't be able to believe me. Then Ava, Luke, Peter, and Sam would just be waiting with me, waiting for you to get better. You know that's the way it would go. Anything I try won't work. Not on Magic. You know more Magic than I do. Is there anyone who can heal you?_

_**Only time will tell.**_

_I need ideas, Danny, ideas! Anything!_

_**Why do we not just enjoy the serenity surrounding us for the time it shall last? Do not give me that look. If I had accepted death, would I have asked you to marry me?**_

_THAT's what he asked me? Yes, oh, this feels utterly right._

_**Would you prefer to be wed in K'un L'un or here?**_

_We don't need a ceremony. Just... know that I love you, 'kay? I will forever, even when I'm dead. You can, you know, find another girl, though, if you want. I understand._

_**We of K'un L'un believe that each man is blessed with one true, great love in his life. The monks do not approve of multiple relationships- they hardly allow one, and only for the few they deem deserving.**_

_They deemed you 'deserving'?_

_**I have not exactly... approached them, per say. **_

_This will go over well, then._

_**Likely not. Though they shall soon see your beauty; it is not a question of if you are worthy, but if I deserve such a miracle.**_

_Stop with the flattery! I can't help giggling, though, because Danny does not usually use such 'pretty' words. _

_**Honesty should not be confused with flattery.**_

_I blush. Well, exactly; that was obviously flattery! Danny laughs at me, and I join in. _

_Why are we so seemingly... 'immortal' in these Dreams?_

_**They are Magic. Besides, Time is one of earth's greatest illusions.**_

_It is. But... I sigh. I hate all this dying. I can feel it around me, surrounding me. Why do we have to die? Everything in Life is so bittersweet, nothing lasting long. People are dying, every day, and each of them had a name. They had lives, they had loved ones that they left behind. I know we should die when we are elderly and greet death with an open mind and ready heart, but why must so many die young? This isn't fair, life isn't fair, and I'm tired of it!_

_**Everyone's time comes when they are ready.**_

_No it doesn't! Look around you, Danny. Just look at you, look at me. I'm not ready to die!_

_**I beg to differ. Of everyone that I know, you are the most prepared to greet death with an open mind and ready heart. You seem to have lived without regret; something which I cannot claim. **_

_Accepting death is not the same as being ready to die!_

_**Oh, but it is.**_

_I sigh. I regret so much, Danny. _

_**Yet if you had the option to go back in time and change those decisions, you would not.**_

_Not most of them, no, because I somehow ended up with S.H.I.E.L.D. I wouldn't have gone to Central Park to think, though, that one time, and I wouldn't have walked anywhere near my old apartment... whenever that happened. If I hadn't done those two things, you wouldn't be blind and we wouldn't be having this conversation._

_**He may have kidnapped you anyways, and then perhaps you or I would have died. Those people- would they have given up so easily?**_

_No. They wouldn't have. I wring my hands, tired of questioning the past. Would it have been so terrible if I had died there anyway? I lay down on the soft grass, staring at the pale blue sky. _

_**Yes. It would have.**_

_Danny stretches out beside me. Why?_

_**Because then you would not be here. You would never come to K'un L'un. You would not speak to me again. You would not breath, or live. You would be dead. You would not kiss me, you would not-**_

_Then what am I waiting for? I lean in, and as my lips press into his, a shiver runs up my back. We wrap our arms around each other, and I collapse into Danny's chest, absorbed by the rhythmical rise and fall. _

_**Emma?**_

_Yes?_

_He presses his mouth to my ear, whispering. The words fall into my ears, as gentle as the first summer drizzle of July, each raindrop resting on the top of my heart, and I hold them there, shimmering in their glory._

_**I love you.**_

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I sit up suddenly, gasping, sweat beading on my forehead. "Danny?" I cry, the words falling from my tongue before I can think.

"You're awake!" Ava exclaims.

"Where am I?" I say, squinting at the room. If I didn't know better, I would say that this is a room in the Tricarrier, but the Tricarrier blew up.

"The new Tricarrier."

"Wait, but-" I pause. "What even happened to the original Tricarrier?"

"I'll tell you later, okay?"

I frown. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing."

"You're a really bad liar."

"Oh, shut the hell up already. Just get your ass up, and follow me. I don't care what shit Fury ordered."

I stare at Ava. What on earth could be this important? I stand up and, walking behind her, decide that I dare to inquire further. Panting from trying to keep up with Ava, I ask, "How long have I been out?"

"Two days. Long 'nuff," she grunts, turning a corner. Her grave expression as well as the fact that she is wearing her uniform tell me that this is serious. Ava refuses to answer any more of my questions, and my stomach fills with icy dread. Suddenly, she halts in front of a room, and, after pressing her finger onto the little passkey board, drags me into the infirmary.

The infirmary. No. Danny. Ava leads me to the very end of the corridor, towards a bed where he lies. Dying, of course. Surrounded by beeping machines, kept alive by these mechanical devices.

"Thought you should see him," Ava says quietly. "Fury gave me some shit about not letting you say goodbye. But I thought, well, that's a bunch of crap- we're not saying goodbye to anyone!" At the last part, though, her voice breaks, rising uncontrollably.

A lump forms in the back of my throat, and I cannot say anything for a moment as my eyes swell with unbidden tears. Ironic, isn't it, that only minutes ago, I was comforted by the rise and fall of his chest in a Dream, because it meant that he was close, but now, my only hope is that rising and falling, because it, and the monitor, are the only signs that his heart still pumps blood? Peter puts a hand on my shoulder, and I turn to see his tear stained face.

Peter, crying. The truth hits me with a sharp pang in my chest. "Nurse said he won't... won't go through the night," he chokes, the words catching in his throat. Terrible, evil, dark words.

Luke is leaning against the wall, his gaze directed at the floor, unmoving, like an enormous stone statue. Sam is slumped in a chair, blankly staring ahead, as if this isn't really happening. He won't believe Danny is gone until he's gone.

Neither will I.

Danny can't die. No.

_There are no guarantees in life, Emma. _His words haunt me.

I force myself to see this in a new light; there are no guarantees, so there is no guarantee that he will die. He will live. Danny is the immortal Iron Fist. He won't die, not yet. It is not his time. If I could, I would gladly exchange positions right now.

I hang back, not wanting to approach him. Admittedly, I am afraid; afraid of what I will see, what I will hear, but most of all, what I will feel. "_You can close your eyes to the things you do not want to see but you cannot close your heart to the things you do not want to feel." _

Trust. I need to trust Danny. He will not die. He will live. Every breath counts, each time his chest expands is a victory in itself.

Carefully, I sit down next to Sam, scooting closer to Danny. He is veiled by tubes and wires of all sizes, but I gently place his limp, pale hand in mine and squeeze it. I will never let him go.

**So? Dearest readers, the fate of Daniel Rand, The Immortal Iron Fist, is at your fingertips.**

**Whether through review or Private Message (PM), you will decide if he shall live or die. The better/more your reasons (if you provide any), the more weight you will have in this decision. So please, tell me! **

**Even a simple "Live" or "die" will suffice, though I prefer if you explain your reasoning. Please! Imagine what will happen if you don't review and Danny lives/dies (whichever you * don't * want)- the horror! Anonymous review graciously accepted! **

_**I know there are many readers out there who don't review- I watch my "views/visitors" as well as "follows/favorites"! Please! Just this once! **_

**Bear in mind, though, that if Danny dies now, the opportunity for a more painful death is banished. After all, even if he lives through this, who says he won't die later? Or he could live happily ever after*.**

**Thank you.**

**-FFS**

**P.S. To leggo lover 99 & TheOnyxDragon12:**

**There shall be guts and gore; blood and pain (not necessarily in that order). There shall be death whether or not Danny survives. I guarantee it. Just sit tight while I set up the Greater Plot. **

*** Not likely. The odds, judging from previous reviews, are certainly against him. Plus thi authoress has her plot finished, and MUHAHAHA- *cough cough *. **


	24. Those Stinkin' Stairs

**Chapter 24: Those Stinkin' Stairs**

"_**There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1.**_

_**There's 0.1 and 0.12 and 0.112.**_

_**Of course, there is a bigger set of infinite numbers between 0 and 2**_

_**Or between 0 and a million.**_

_**Some infinities are bigger than other infinities.**_

_**A writer we used to like taught us that.**_

_**There are days. Many of them.**_

_**When I represent the size of any unbounded set...**_

_**But Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity.**_

_**I wouldn't trade it for the world.**_

_**You gave me forever within numbered days, and I am grateful."**_

"_**The Fault in Our Stars" by John Green**_

I do not fall asleep all night, not leaving his side for even a moment. When somebody is so close to the end, each minute becomes precious; even more so when the person on death's door is someone you love, with love being the sole token of precious life.

Death is, after all, rather like opening a door to the basement. Downstairs, it is dark with the veil of the unknown- the unknown being what we humans fear most in life. One day something will shove you from behind, and you will go tumbling down the stairs. When one is falling, it only becomes increasingly hard to stop falling as time passes until you reach the bottom, which is Death of course. As you fall, you find that the further you tumble, the harder it is to see the world above, and you begin to wonder what might be waiting for you if you do not stop. In fact, there is often little reason to try to stop falling, as the effort required to stop yourself is nearly unattainable. Even if, per say, you did manage to halt yourself, you would have to crawl blindly up the stairs to a world filled with broken promises, when there is (an admittedly dark) world of unknowns that would be easy to enter, that has a chance (however small) of being better. Most will take that chance. Especially if they consider the heartache and pain that is Life's only remaining promise, and that they may, in fact, be shoved right back down, and die anyways.

That is why, when he still breaths the next morning, all pronounce it a miracle. Who, of all the broken soldiers, actually slows their fall? Only Danny.

None of my teammates had left him all night either. I suppose when someone could just give up at any second, there not being a particularly favorable one over any other, those seconds that they _haven't _given up on are gold. My mind is numb, though, because all feelings have been redirected to my tender heart. My torn, aching, painfully trusting heart.

_Is it not strange the way hearts are so soft yet so resilient? _I wonder as, at ten o'clock that morning, I sit there. I refuse to be waiting, because the very idea of 'waiting' would suggest that I am waiting for him to give up, when in reality, it should imply the very opposite; that Danny has halted, and set his heart on dragging himself up to the top again, however long and tiresome that may be.

My mind wanders back to my train of though about soft, resilient hearts. They feel everything that life has to offer, burying the memories deep into the core, because hearts have no filter; they simply feel, in the same way that minds think and people live (_or die_, a small voice chimes in). Why don't our hearts just decide that they have had enough? After all, people can tire of living, voices can tire of speaking, so why don't hearts just say that they shall no longer feel?

Hearts feel too much to ever let go. Just like me.

They can tear, break, and shatter, forever bearing the scars of life, yet when the right person comes along, hearts allow themselves to be pieced together again. Hearts allow themselves to heal, somewhat. It is as if they have no choice in the matter. People can choose to never live again, and minds may choose to never think again, but hearts rarely never feel again, for however numb one's heart may seem to be, it still feels. A numb heart is simply a silenced heart, drowned underneath the dirt of everyday thoughts of what and how the heart should feel rather than how the heart _does _feel.

Oh, and how my heart hurts right now. It feels like I am the one on the verge of death instead of Danny. I can't even cry, but for some reason, I don't want to; crying would be morning, and that would be the start of the end. Crying would mean me giving up, signifying that I have lost my trust that Danny will live.

The silly thing is, that he hasn't changed at all. Danny is precisely the same as he was last night. I want to think he has stopped falling, with the only choice remaining to crawl up or go back to falling. So when the doctor comes in (as he has every hour) and examines Danny, my heart leaps up. Funny the way I can't stop hoping, believing, and trusting this boy. Something inside me says that after all these years, I should have learned by now that hope is pointless, believing in heartbreak, and trusting is death, but I know Danny is different. This past year has been different, and my remaining months will be too.

Then, when the doctor raises his eyebrow, and writes something on his clipboard, I can't stop my heart from swelling in hope, in the belief that Danny is slowly starting to heal. My words catch in my throat, leaping up from my heart but refusing to part with my tongue. The doctor knows what I am trying to say, though, and, hesitantly, he nods.

A grin spreads across my face. Hopelessness is not so hopeless after all. If you hope, then you will believe, and if you believe, then you will trust, and if you can trust, then love will come easily.

I stare eagerly at the machinery, trying to decipher the meaning behind the beeps and scribbles. It is odd the way time snails by in this manner, yet, by some chance of nature, flies past me, with the only markings of passing being the hourly examination. Up, up, down, up, up up, up, down, up—the only things which can hold any of our attention are the doctor and Danny.

I know that Danny truly is healing, though, when the nurse kicks us all out that night, proclaiming that we seriously need to eat and sleep. Grudgingly, we leave the room, and I find that I am, actually, _hungry._

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It's not the same as any of the times before. All of the other times that Danny has been in the infirmary, I have sat there, patiently waiting for him to wake. We are only allowed to visit for a limited amount of time for each day, though, forced to spend the rest of our waking hours in the terrible pastime known as _waiting_.

I continuously wring my hands because however much he improves, he's still sick, and I cannot stop the worry from lingering in the dusty corners of my mind. The days drag into weeks, and Danny steadily gets better. I suppose. Honestly, whatever Nick might say, I don't think the meds are what help. I think that Danny is the one healing himself. His energy is different. I can feel it.

That's another change I have noticed. Before, others' "energy" effected me and such, but now, I can literally feel it—I can _see _it. The energy is colorful, and it seems, at times, that I am but a small cloud in a rainbow world, which is kind of funny to think about.

It's already June first. Peter had a … long talk with his aunt. Nick told them that neither of them can return to their house, and is making sure that they remain in the (new) Tricarrier (I still cannot get somebody to explain what happened to the old one, other than "It exploded"). It occurs to me that, technically, my Year is already twenty five percent gone. That seriously hurts.

Honestly, at this point, anything that does not matter to me is completely omitted from my life. I practice Kundalini and go to training, sometimes going on missions- anything to keep busy. I can no longer bear to sit still, and my whole body is always buzzing. Especially after being around other people.

Next week, Nick says that Danny can leave the infirmary, but he has to rest. At least he does not need help breathing any more; these past few weeks have been rough on him, I can tell, from what I see of him.

Danny still is pushing Uzun Uyku, but I have taken to going mute whenever he mentions it. I want to let the past be the past, and the future become the future. When one has but nine months remaining, you have no choice but to live in the present, and that is what I have been doing. It is easier to be perpetually happy than to be gloomy; what kind of life would being sad all of the time be?

With a small, imperceptible sigh I enter Nick's office, telling myself all of the good things that have been happening. I guess that at some point, he really was bound to make me face Ore.

"Took you long enough. Come on."

Silently, I follow him until we reach his prison cell. He is contained in a small room, bound by thick plastic chains, and the only things separating us are a few feet of empty air and an all too thin force field.

"Ore."

"Hayat Ruh."

"You have come to see me here."

"Well, yeah. I didn't have much a choice," I say irritably, glancing back at Nick. The entire idea of holding a mutant boy who controls metal in an enormous metal machine in the sky seems incredibly stupid to me, but who bothers with my opinion anyways?

Nick snorts, as if he can hear my thoughts. "You two sure have a lot to say. Em, this is the last time you're seeing him before he's moved to a private faculty."

My eyes narrow; what right does Nick have to hold Ore in a prison? "What crime did he commit?"

"None. He's too dangerous to let roam around."

"I'll take that as a compliment!" Ore chimes in, but I ignore him.

"So you're imprisoning him because he has a mutation?" I snarl. "So much for racism."

"Why do you care about Ian here so much suddenly?"

I pause. Not because I don't know my answer, because I do, but rather for the reason that I just realized what a despicable, ensnaring trap this is. "Nick, Flame sent him here to destroy the Tricarrier!"

Nick rolls his eyes. "He already did that."

My eyes widen in anger, and Ore shrugs sheepishly. "You little-" I start to say, but Nick interrupts me.

"Time for this kid's departure." Nick turns around, nonchalantly, and leads me back to his office.

"Why on earth did you need me to do that?" I demand.

"Wanted to see how much you've changed. And hell, kid, have you changed this past year."

"So?"

Nick sighs. "So, kid, people have been contacting me. About you. Don't worry, I didn't tell them anything- they know you're with S.H.I.E.L.D. already anyway. Point is, Xavier doesn't trust you. He must not, if he's broken his promise. And different branches of S.H.I.E.L.D. want you for different reasons. Magneto's offered to pay me big bucks just to see a photo of you."

I glare at him. "Xavier?" I spit. "He shouldn't have broken that promise. He needs to learn to keep his head out of my business. I don't _care _if he can sense me! I don't _care _if different branches of S.H.I.E.L.D. want me! I don't _care_ if Magneto wants me!"

He raises his eyebrows. "Who said that Xavier can sense you or that Magneto wants to recruit you?"

"It's pretty obvious, Nick. These men are called 'great'. Maybe they are. Maybe they aren't. Either way, I'm not their exclusive property. I am my own person. I don't _care_ if they regret letting me 'slip away' all those years ago."

"You're powerful enough to be classified as a worldwide threat, kid. But I'm me, so I've pulled some strings."

"I _know_ my days are numbered, Nick, you don't need to remind me! Did you even read that stupid email?"

"What email?" he frowns. "I never check my email."

Figures. "Nick, I'm effing _dying_, okay? I never planned on living that long; I sort of _have _to die, I don't care what tec you offer me- it's my choice to make, and my mind's made up! This March I'm going to K'un L'un with Danny to die. Nothing you say can change that, all right?!" I say, just letting the words tumble out.

Nick's face is grave, and he says, "Fine. It is your choice to make, even if your decision isn't the right one."

"I'M NOT DOING UZUN UYKU, FOR THE LAST TIME!" I scream. Why can't these people just shut up and accept that death is _my_ decision, not theirs?!

I storm from the office, wishing that the doors didn't shut of their own accord, because I really want to slam something right now. From behind me, I hear the door going, _bang-bang, bang-bang, _and I whisk around to see it fanatically opening and shutting, rapid fire. The lights closest to me flicker on and off.

I hate electricity! Why can't life just go the way it's supposed to?

Blindly, I run through the Tricarrier, barging past people, until I collide with something large, and firm, falling to the ground. In my fury, I don't bother to apologize, but a large, dark-skinned hand reaches down to help me up. I turn away, unwilling to accept Luke's help, and keep running until I collapse on the lounge room sofa. For lack of a better activity, I flick on the television to some stupid movie that, frankly, doesn't turn out to be so stupid.

It's about a girl, who is dying of cancer. One day she meets another boy who recovered from cancer already, and they end up (convincingly) falling in love. Usually I am not one for romance, but this one draws me in. By the end, when the boy dies, I am sobbing my heart out into the stupid couch cushion.

"Hey, what's the matter, Em?" Ava asks, walking in as the credits start rolling.

I sniffle, then manage to say in between streaming tears, "Oh, I just watched a really sad movie." My nose is stuffy, though, so it sounds like I said, "Bo, By just botched a ready bad bovie."

Ava grins lopsidedly at me. "What's on next?"

"Titanic."

She jumps onto the sofa beside me, putting an arm over my shoulder. "Well, you're already pretty messed up looking, so putting those tear ducts to work some more can't hurt, right?"

I grin back, knowing that I must look fairly pitiable, with my blotchy, red face and streaming eyes. "Sure."

**I didn't feel like torturing you guys with a cliffhanger, my bad, sorry. Sorry if it was rather philosophical or something, I just read a certain book and I'm still kinda crying over it. Thanks for the reviews:**

**Timelord: Aw, thank you for the chapter 1 review! I'm so happy now! =) (Haha, yeah, I don't pay much attention to reality. Seriously, though, that makes me feel so happy inside.) **

**Hamster1000: Pretty good reason, sis. I finally reviewed your AG fic BTW.**

**Isn'tThatIronic: Best reason ever.**

**TheOnyxDragon12: What's wrong with you and Misty Night? Oh, by the way, I think she's standing behind you...**

**Nerdy-Tomboy: Gotcha!**

**Thank you so much to all of you first time reviewers and faithful reviewers! ;-D **

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man, or the quote, but I do own my Oc's and the idea!**

**-FFS**


	25. Nights of Blood

**DISCLAIMER: You know the drill. I don't own the quotes or Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC's and the idea.**

**Chapter 25: Nights of Blood**

"_**You see the smile that's on my mouth.**_

_**It's hiding the words that don't come out."**_

_**-Brandi Carlile**_

Sunday, the morning after Danny left the infirmary, finds me in the lounge room, stretching. Peter stumbles to the couch, a bowl of cereal in hand. I can't help but blush slightly, as I am wearing only a camisole and stretch pants, and Peter is wearing his (teddy bear) underwear and a tee shirt.

"Not a word," he glares at me, and I see that _someone _(probably Sam)drew a mustache on him, not to mention that they (Sam) practically painted him with eyeshadow, blush, and lip gloss.

"I bet that Ava has something to take that off," I say. "I don't actually wear makeup, so..."

Peter looks dumbfounded. "Ava wears _makeup_?"

"Sometimes. She just doesn't make it look like she's wearing a mask, unlike certain people in this room."

"Shuddup."

Luke walks in. "Oh, _dude. _When did you last look in a mirror?"

"Shuddup."

I grin crookedly at him. "Has your aunt seen you yet?"

Peter's eyes widen, and he drops his bowl of cereal as he stands up, running off, presumably to try to find Ava and some makeup remover.

"That's going to be embarrassing if he doesn't change soon," Ava remarks.

"You mean his shorts? Wait til you see his face. Oh, and he just ran off to look for you," I say.

She shrugs. "He'll figure it out eventually. What kind of stretch is _that_?"

I shrug. "No idea. It feels good, though."

"That looks painful."

"Nah, it's actually pretty gentle compared to some of the others."

Ava stares at me disbelievingly. "If you say so. Nice shirt."

A blush creeps back onto my cheeks. "Well, nobody was up when I started stretching!" I say, easing myself out of the stretch to go to my room and change into actual clothes. Sam passes me in the corridor, his eyes falling to my shirt, and his eyebrows shoot up. "Not a word," I say, tossing the sentence over my shoulder, not bothering to look where I'm walking until my body collides with another.

"Good morning," Danny greets me as I struggle to untangle myself from him. He raises his eyebrows at my shirt. "The monks tend towards modesty in K'un L'un."

"I know!" I say irritably, brushing myself off and standing back up. I face him, and my eyes find his green ones. "Sor-" Danny leans in, and our noses gently bump as he finds my lips, and we wrap our arms around each other, pulling him closer- oh, this feels so right. Breaking away, I grin at him.

"Uh..." Sam trails off from behind us.

"You seriously stood there the whole time?" I give him my best 'death glare' over the rims of my glasses, wishing that he would disappear.

"Uh... I was just going to ask you where Peter went..."

"Right behind you, Bucket Head. This had better not be permanent marker..."

"Uh..."

"DIE!"

I laugh as Sam dashes around the corner, Peter close behind. Danny wraps his arm around me, and I lean my head on his shoulder. "Feeling better?"

"Yes," he smiles. "What is this on your shoulder?" His hand brushes over my tattoo, which raises slightly off of my skin.

"Oh, nothing. Just that, uh, tattoo..."

"Of what?"

I shift uncomfortably. "Just an infinity sign and some writing." _Forget what hurt you but never what it taught you._ A reminder to myself to be thankful. I had gotten it after leaving Xavier's. Xavier. I tense up nervously at the reminder of him. Those painful memories that I don't want to arouse are just around the corner, and suddenly, I find myself afraid to be alone.

"What is wrong?"

"Oh, nothing," I lie, smiling at him. "Going to eat breakfast?"

"No."

"Oh," I say uncertainly.

"I wanted to ask you something." I am silent, and Danny continues, "Are you certain that you would not consider Uzun Uyku?"

I take a deep breath in, letting it out slowly. "Yes. I'm sure."

There is a long silence, until, at last, I realize that we have training in a little bit, and I hurry away to change.

"What took you so long?" Ava snaps.

I turn away. "Nothing."

After training, I head straight to my bedroom, collapsing on my bed, and allow the visions to overwhelm me. Holding back does no good anymore. Everything just builds up inside, and I constantly feel as if I could burst.

On and on, images bombard me. War. Starvation. Murder. Death. Illness. Tragedy. _Suffering. _No, no, no. None of these things are happening. They aren't my life!

A hand shakes me, gently at first, then harder. Voices seem to be shouting for me in the distance, but I can't hear them. With sudden clarity, though, my eyes flash open, and I see his worried face above mine. "What is wrong? Emmaline? Emma?"

Shaking, I sit up, hugging my knees to my chest. Danny sits down beside me at the edge of the bed and hugs me to him. I bury my face into his chest, wishing that I were blind, that I could not see any of this. He strokes my head, and I just lay there.

After a few minutes, he whispers, "Why did you scream?"

I try to blink my tears away, but they refuse to stop coming. I want to lay here with Danny forever; never to face the world again, never have to die. Before, I was not afraid to die, perhaps because I had nothing to lose, but now, Danny is my world, everything, and I will lose him when I die. When you lose everything, what is your purpose any longer? I should never have let myself love him—I know firsthand how it feels to have a loved one die, and it leaves this little scar on your heart forever. "I... I Dreamed," I gasp into his shirt.

"You are strong," he murmurs to me.

No I'm not. I'm weak. As my body becomes stronger, I weaken. "No, Danny. I am weak. I am dying."

"We all are."

A little beeping sounds from my com, and I don't want to answer, but Danny lifts up my arm, directing the camera at us. The little screen shows Peter wearing his Spider-Man uniform, amidst a battle. "WE NEED BACKUP! NOW!"

I jump up, glad that I did not bother to change out of my uniform. Danny stands up beside me. "I am coming."

"No-"

"Yes." He pulls his mask over his eyes, and we rush to the center of New York City, where the Frightful Four are demolishing everything. I feel numb the entire way there, but as soon as we arrive, I start to buzz. Too many people.

We are immersed in the battle. Kick, hit, duck, smash, jump, shout—we fight. Peter and Ava both shout orders at everyone else, and I obey without question. Usually I would think weigh my every option, ignoring their commands, but today is different. From the corner of my eye, I spot Sam, flying, about to shoot at the Trapster.

"NO!" I scream, but before the words leave my mouth, I know it will be too late, so I jump. The Trapster leaps out of the way at the last minute, and I taste blood in my mouth as I see the poor girl who was hiding behind the trash can that the Trapster had been standing in front of. Miraculously, though, I manage to shield her, and the white light blinds me.

A metallic taste replaces the blood in my mouth, and I can feel the heavy pavement beneath me, scraping against the places where my skin is exposed. Blinking the stars away, I realize with a start that I feel better than I did before. I feel awake, refreshed by the energy. Once I manage to push myself up into a sitting position, I hold up my quivering hands to find that I have to hands.

"Huh?" I say thickly, the words catching on my tongue. I can feel my fingers, I can wiggle them, but I can't _see _them. It hits me; my hands are _invisible. _I glance down at my arms, my legs, but I can see the rest of me, just not my hands. It occurs to me that the force hit my hands first, so my hands should have absorbed the energy...

"Crud, crud, crud," Sam mutters, landing beside me. "That was _so _not my fault, was it?"

I open my mouth to tell him that it was actually kind of his fault, but I end up spitting out blood. I guess that I am bleeding after all.

Peter walks over, towards Sam, a smug look on his face. "Hey, Helmet Hair, while _you _missed the Trapster, Tiger and I 'trapped' the rest of the baddies! What do you have to say about—_what the heck did you do to Emma?!"_

Again, I try to speak up, and the words stumble out, slurred by blood. "He... blasted- me."

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Ava yells.

"'M... 'm fine... fine... see?" To prove my point, I stand up, only to find the world spinning, and I fall backwards, into Luke's arms. "Sorry..."

He picks me up, then (kindly) hands me to Danny. I grin lopsidedly at him. "'M good... good as chocolate cookies, see? I- I can stand, and, and stand, and I- love you- I you... see? All- all good..." I slur, giving them all a thumbs up before passing out.

**M.M.M.M..MM.M.M.. ..M. ..M.M.M.M.M.M..MM..M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M.M..**

I rub my head, trying to ignore the throbbing pain. "That sucked," I say to nobody in particular, opening my eyes to find myself still in Danny's arms as we walk back to the Tricarrier.

"You are awake."

"Yeah," I say, my head still aching. "Hey, my hands are back!"

"They were gone?"

"Um... yeah... well, invisible anyway..." I trail off, knowing all too well that I sound crazy.

"Oh." Danny pauses. "You are feeling better?"

"Yeah, I- Danny, right! Sharp right; lamppost ahead!" Once the brush with danger has been avoided, I try to resume the conversation. "I'm fine. You can put me down, if I'm kinda heavy and all."

"You have lost weight."

I look at Danny. "No I-"

"Look in the mirror when we are back at HQ, Emma. Sometimes we are most blind to the truths about ourselves."

"You can put me down," I repeat, even though I don't really want to walk.

"No."

"You're stubborn."

"Touche."

I sigh again, then lean my head back against his shoulder for the remainder of the way.

Back at the Tricarrier, I shove my way past everyone, oblivious to their questions, heading straight to my room. In my bathroom, I look in the mirror, trying to see if Danny is right.

My skin is pale, but that is probably just the bright indoor lighting. I look closer, though, and I start to see what he means; my skin clings to my small frame with a sense of desperation, and I realize that I'm not 'healthy slim', but actually underweight. Looking back, I suppose that this is just a "side effect of dying". I mean, who expects a dying person to be healthy looking?

With an air of defeat, I leave my bedroom, deciding that maybe meditation will help. At least if I meditate then I don't have to think about anything. When I open the door, though, an unexpected sight greets me.

Ava and Peter are sitting on the couch. Together. Making out.

I hastily try to make the door slide closed but (curse these stupid high-tech doors) before the little command panel can register that I've pressed the 'shut' button, they break apart, a brilliant shade of red spreading across their cheeks. Both still don their superhero uniforms, and Ava slides her mask over her face to try to hide the fact that she is blushing, but it's too late. I back away, jamming the 'close' button, but it's not working, and Ava grabs me by the wrist and drags me away, to her bedroom.

"Not. A. Word. To. Anyone."

I nod. "Sorry..."

Ava shakes her head. "Somebody was bound to find out about us. Eventually. You can keep a secret?"

Hollowly, I laugh. "Yeah. My whole life's been secrets, ya know?" I pause. "Why didn't you say anything? Tell anyone?"

She backs away, releasing my wrist, and turns her back to me, then says, "It was too dangerous, you know? The way nothing 'top secret' at S.H.I.E.L.D. seems to stay secret anymore—just look at this past year. I- I shouldn't be doing this. We're just endangering each other."

"Ava... you have a right to a life, you know. You can actually date people."

"You of all people should realize this, Em."

My stomach sinks horribly. Yes, I do. Danny and I dating caused a lot of trouble, and we have both almost caused the others death at some point (me hurting Danny more often than the other way around). It's been worth it, though. I know that Ava thinks she needs to be this calm, controlled, disciplined woman constantly, but she has a right to actually live. "I do. Don't get me wrong... but love's worth it, if you both want to take the risk, you know? It's like the best thing that ever happens—there's nothing like it. Everything's worth it, cuz you'd both die for each other."

"No. No. Other things come first. I _have_ to get my priorities in order again," she says softly.

"Ava, you've got to live. You don't know when you're going to die! Is Peter worth it?"

Ava faces me again, but her eyes are hard now. "I shouldn't be doing this. We're just going to end up killing each other..." She closes her eyes for a moment. "But we both agreed. If it's a secret, and nobody knows..." With sudden ferocity, she takes me by the shoulders and viciously shakes me. "You're not going to tell anybody, right?!"

I firmly remove her hands from my shoulders, before replying, "I won't breath a word, 'K?"

Breathing hard, Ava nods. I start to walk away, but as I am about to leave, she hugs me. "Thanks. I'm sorry..."

"It's worth it," I whisper to her, walking into the hallway. A little droplet of water splashes onto my nose, and I look up. Peter is perched on the ceiling, dripping slightly, waiting.

He looks down at me questioningly. "What did-"

I smile at him, innocently saying, "Hmm? Ava and I were just discussing her calculus. She's been helping me since we got back. What are you doing?"

Gratefully, Peter grins back. "Oh... uh... just hanging around..."

"See ya later," I say, tossing the words nonchalantly behind me, deciding to fix myself some lunch. Typically, I pass by Sam on the way, who stops me.

"Have you seen Web Head?"

"No..." I lie. "Why? What's your latest prank?"

Sam grins at me. "Oh, I just found some dirt on him."

Guilt settles in my gut. "Like what...?"

"Like... he wears _teddy bear _underwear!"

I give him a look. Everybody has realized that after this morning's prank. "And you wear bunny rabbit ones, I'm sure. Who cares?"

Sam cringes, glancing ominously around the hallway. "Second thought, see you around later."

I shrug to myself, wondering what Sam is plotting (and why he cringed), and go about making myself a salad. Danny walks in as I sit down, and slides into the chair across from me.

"Hey, Danny, does Sam have something against underwear?"

"Not that I am aware of. Why?" Danny looks curious.

"I ran into him earlier, and he was chatting about how he had some 'dirt' on Peter- apparently Spider-Man wears teddy bear underwear to bed- and I told him that was silly; that Sam probably wears bunny undies or something, and he dashed away."

A smile spreads across Danny's face. The first casual, humorous smile that I have seen in a long time. "Ah... yes. Sam _loves _rabbits. Especially albino ones."

I raise my eyebrow. "What did you guys do to him?"

"Long story short: Nightmare infiltrated everyone's dreams, I saw Sam's, and Peter decided to have a little... _fun_. It really was quite hilarious at the time," he adds, his grin widening at the memory.

"I'm sure it was," I giggle, picturing my version of what must have happened.

Grouchily, Sam stomps into the kitchen, removing the jug of milk from the refrigerator. "Says you." He casts an angry glare at Danny before downing the rest of the gallon. A look of horror appears on his face, and Sam rushes to the sink, spitting out the mouthful of milk.

"Expires: June 20th, of _one year ago_," I read, scooping the jug from the floor where Sam dropped it. "Nice and ripe. Taste any better after having so much time to sit? Did it curdle in your mouth like cheese?"

"That is incredibly disgusting," Danny remarks.

Sam begins rinsing his mouth with water. When he emerges at last, his eyes portray absolute fury. "DIE! PETER, YOU'RE DEAD!"

"Last time I checked, I was alive," Peter taunts, his voice echoing through the ventilation system, and with a roar of anger, Sam charges off after the Web Head. I shake my head. That was a _very_ dumb thing to do, needless to say.

"Think Peter's been saving that milk all year? Boy, what a waste."

"It would not surprise me," Danny says, his face emotionless, but his words laden with amusement.

"They've been telling each other to 'die' a lot lately," I say.

"An abundance of negative energy," Danny remarks, with evident purpose as to where he wishes to direct the conversation.

"Not now. Not here."

"Why not?"

"Just... no, okay?" I stand, pushing my chair in, and return to my room, reading a book until dinner. I can't concentrate, though—my eyes skim over the letters without noticing the words they form, so by the time I have finished, I know nothing more about what just happened to Jessica than when I started.

Walking into the kitchen, I can smell the delicious aroma of pasta. Sam must have cooked dinner again tonight.

"Hey," he greets me, removing the pan of lasagna from the oven. "Spinach lasagna!"

"Yum," I say. "Thanks for cooking dinner." I slide into the chair next to Danny. Everybody except Peter is already sitting at the table. Mrs. Parker looks out of place amongst the rest of us, despite her youthful personality. Her lips are thin, and pressed together in the manner of one who is constantly anxious; I should know, because that's the way I used to be all of the time. I've long since given up on constant worry, though. Or at least I had thought.

Just as Sam begins serving the food, Peter strolls in, his face glum, and collapses into the seat next to his aunt. He is wearing his Spider-Man uniform, without the mask. In response to our confused looks, he rolls his eyes, and shoves a bite of lasagna into his mouth.

Dinner is awkward. It's only the second time that Mrs. Parker has eaten with us, and even though she is a good conversationalist in general, the rest of us don't have much to say. Now that I think about it, I see Ava and Peter glancing at each other every so often, before quickly redirecting their gaze to the table, neither of them saying much throughout the meal. Sam maintains a fairly steady stream of talking with Mrs. Parker for the first part of dinner, but since they are the only people talking, their voices soon die away. Luke glances from Danny to me and back again occasionally, but doesn't say anything.

I stare at my food. It is delicious, but I'm not hungry. The only mind-numbing sound is the clatter of silverware against plates, which fades into but a small background noise. I find myself beginning to nod away, and continuously force myself to keep my eyes open.

_He pressed a knife, cold and unforgiving, to her throat. "You didn't actually think I was telling the truth, did you?" he breathed into her ear. "You did!" His laughter was chillier than the knife's blade, and she felt goose bumps on her arms._

"_Well," he continued, his words raw, echoing through the basement, "I lied."_

_The tears gathered in her eyes, but she blinked fiercely, biting her tongue as she tried to hold back the flood. They came, though, hot and fast, like rivers of fire crawling down her cheeks._

"_They're all dead. Gone. What do you have to say to that?"_

_Nothing. Liz had nothing to say; there was nothing left to feel. Everything was gone. This man was worse than a thief of jewels or riches, for he was a stealer of lives, and nothing is worth the life of a loved one—nothing she could possibly do would ever force him to repay his debt. _

_His heart was stoney, and he did not regret the blood on his hands. It was obvious from the confidence in his voice, the way his hand was firm and unwavering as he waved the tools of death before her eyes. She had nothing to say, because what could you say to one that you hated with your entire being? One that she wished to damn to tenfold her suffering, their suffering, but could not; for how could you hurt one who did not feel?_

_The edge of the blade cut into her skin, and the warm flow of blood was comforting to her frozen skin as her life ebbed away. Liz was happy to die, though, for death was the only way she would be able to see them again. _

_However, the murder disliked her silence. He wanted her to scream, so he twisted the blade further down into her chest, and relished the horrific sounds that he drew from her mouth._

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" I scream, because my entire body feels like it was on fire, the pain licking my skin, and, shaking, I try to open my eyes, but they will not cooperate.

Warm, comforting hands press against the flames, extinguishing them, and I can see again, people floating around me. Their concerned faces are trying to tell me something, but I cannot hear them, so I squeeze my eyes shut again, letting the pain drown me into oblivion.

A soft voice drew me back in. I cling to the unintelligible words, unable to decipher anything of meaning, but the rhythm to which he spoke was constant, and the agony begins to ebb away, until only a small, dull sense of fear is left.

The putrid stench of death lingers as I reopen my eyes.

"What the hell just happened?!"

"Uh... dude... I think she's going to pass out again..."

I shake my head, trying to clear away the stray thoughts. "No I'm _not_." Their eyes are wide with worry, and I can tell that nobody believes me. "Why am I on the floor?"

"You fell of your chair," Peter supplies. "When you screamed. After you, ya know, fell asleep on the table."

"That was not sleep," Danny says grimly.

Stupid. Stupid. Why can't anything go right today? My day is starting so suck. A lot. Wait, _starting to_? It's sucked since I woke up this morning and saw Peter with his mustache. "Like hell it was sleep," Ava agrees.

Faintly, I turn away from them, pushing Danny's hand away. "I'm fine. It's nothing. Just tired. I should get to bed, I guess." I want to be angry and irritable with them, but it's not their fault. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Mrs. Parker standing uncertainly back, not sure what she should be doing. After all, she does not exactly know me. Peter told her I'm dying of a genetic disease a while back, and someone like her would have noticed that I was good 'friends' with Danny, not to mention slightly distanced from the rest of my team.

Shakily, I use the table to help me stand up, and with a weak half smile, I start walking to my bedroom. They just stare at me, like I owe them an actual explanation. Which I do. Sort of. The trouble is, properly explaining this kind of thing just isn't possible—not safely, anyway. So I take the easiest route (for once) and leave behind all of their unanswered questions.

Ava catches up with me, matching my quickly-paced but unsteady stride. "What's up with you today?"

"Nothing."

"Sam sure messed you up after this morning's mission. Stupid Bucket Head."

"Sam did _not _mess me up, 'K? I'm fine, like I said. It was just a stupid Dream."

She scrutinizes me closely. "I think you need to talk to Danny 'bout this."

"Yeah, well, I don't! I'm fine."

I hurry to my bedroom, but sleep brings no comfort; just more Dreams. I am so restless that by the next morning I may as well have not slept at all.

I have this feeling that my friends will want to know what happened yesterday, but I decide that I don't want to talk about it, and don't go to breakfast. Around ten, though, somebody knocks on the door.

"Come in."

Danny stands in the doorway.

"No. I'm not talking about it."

"Kundalini?"

I relax at his offer. "Yeah."

The movements are relaxing, but I notice little strings of energy trailing my hands as I flow from one position to the next. They emit a soft, radiant glow, and each string is a different color. For a moment, I pause, staring, then a thought occurs to me. I carefully push my hands closer and closer together, bunching the bits of energy into a multicolored ball that fills the room with light.

"What are you doing?"

I jerk my hands away from the ball of energy, which stays there, floating. "Danny... what does Chi energy look like?"

"Emma... what did you just do?"

"Tell me. What does Chi look like?"

He sighs. "It is our life force, the energies of our bodies."

"Is it colorful?"

"Yes."

I stare at the little ball of energy, then, carefully, scoop it up with my hand. It feels warm, and good. Different from other types of energy, but somehow, I doubt it's Chi. Then I take it and sort of push it into my chest, and, inexplicably, I feel excited. Almost hyper, but different. More peaceful.

"Danny... can you make your Iron Fist?"

He closes his eyes, concentrating. I flick off the lights and watch the energies around his fist, mesmerized by their beauty. For the first time, his fist is not glowing a bright yellow. No. It is as though it is aflame, the tongues of a rainbow of energy licking around his hand, lighting the entire room. Breathlessly, I try to say something, but this is beyond words.

Suddenly, the glow fades away as Danny's fist returns to normal. "What did you see?" he asks me quietly.

"Wow. Danny, wow."

"You saw the Chakras and my Chi?"

I let out a long breath. "I have no idea. It was beautiful."

"It is, yes."

"Just... _wow_."

"What?"

"There's so much energy everywhere. Like, before I could feel it, but now I can _see_ it." Suddenly, I feel ashamed, to be talking of how beautiful something appears when Danny cannot see. "I'm sorry..."

"For what?"

"Just... you know..." I say vaguely. "I'm just sorry 'bout... everything, really."

Danny doesn't say anything as he calmly transitions into Ustrasana (the camel pose). At last, he says, "Life is precious, and fleeting. _'Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is an eternity'_."

"Henry Van Dyke?" I ask.

He nods, shifting to Parsva Ustrasana (the side camel pose). "Buddha wisely told us, _'The trouble is, you think you have time.'_"

"But we don't, do we?" I say quietly. "Nine months, is that really much time? It's no time at all, truthfully."

"It is not the number of days you have left, but how much life is in those days that will matter in the end."

I hug my legs to my chest, struggling with my words. "I know. It's just... I want longer, you know? I don't feel ready. I mean, I'm prepared, but I don't _want to. _I'm not some elderly person who thinks it's their 'time'. I'll be _nineteen_. People die way younger than that, I know, but I feel cheated—I just got myself all pulled together, got a life, and then Fate's like, oh, well, you love a man, and you've found family, time for you to die. I guess I'm not _really _pulled together, more like I'm falling apart, but still..."

Danny looks so sad that I almost regret telling him this. Almost. He sits down next to me and drapes his arm over my shoulder, pulling me closer. "You do not have to. _I _want you to live. You can do Uzun Uyku, Emma..."

"No. I can't."

He tightens his grip. "You are the best candidate that anyone has seen in centuries."

"I'm not worried about me. I'm not willing to risk somebody to be my Dünya Tutun."

"I am willing."

"Yeah, and I'm not," I say, staring at the floor. We've had this exact conversation too many times.

Danny gently turns me to face him, leaning in closer, so that our noses nearly bump. "This. This is special. It is Love. Unconditional Love. The greatest thing in the world. Greater than any risk or fear. It is eternal. One of the few things that lasts forever, no matter what happens. And it means that I will be your İlk ve Tek Aşk, your Dünya Tutun." Then he leans in and kisses me.

**-((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( ((())))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))-**

**A/N: Yeah, tad sappy of an ending for a chapter, but I felt kind of bad for making them suffer, especially with what's coming up for them. **

**Thank you for the reviews:**

**leggo lover 99: Aw, thank you! =)**

**TheOnyxDragon12: I'm never going to get on your bad side...**

**Hamster1000: Yes. Or you could use logic. To quote Peter: "Now all I need to do is sit back and watch logic work its sweet magic."**

**Nerdy-Tomboy: I sincerly hope that I'm a good enough writer to make you cry at the climax. I know that my sis, Hamster1000 will cry for sure (softie), but I'm not sure about the rest of you...**

**Sorry for the long wait! Oh, by the way, as soon as school starts, my updates will be irregular, though there will be at least one chapter per week. I'll give you a heads up before that happens. I hope the chapter's length helps make up for the wait (though the content probably doesn't...). Thanks to TheOnyxDragon12 for helping me out! And Hamster1000 for annoying me the whole time!**

**-FFS**


	26. Suddenly

**DISCLAIMER: You know the drill. I don't own the quotes or Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC's and the idea.**

**Chapter 26: Suddenly**

"_**You never know the last time you'll see a place.**_

_**Or a person."**_

_**-Unknown**_

Afterward, I cannot stop repeating his words in my head. Over and over again. So real. So honest. So true.

_And it means that I will be your İlk ve Tek Aşk, your Dünya Tutun._

It almost makes me cry. From happiness and heartbreak. He just called me, a dying girl, his first and only love. He just told me that he will be my Dünya Tutun, my Earth-Hold while I am in Uzun Uyku, the Eternal Sleep.

I know I can't do Uzun Uyku. I won't. Yet Danny won't give up. I have given up on myself, but he won't.

Suddenly, my com begins beeping. Ava's face appears on the screen. "Hurry up! Ugh, the Wrecking Crew are destroying the same block the Frightful Four just did a few days ago!"

Stupid. I slip into my uniform as quickly as I can, hurrying to the scene. Pretty basic. Normal mission.

The Wrecking Crew are doing their usual sort of thing. Flipping cars, smashing stuff—you get the idea. The rest of my friends were already in the midst of the fight, so I joined right in.

Sam blasts debris out of the air, saving the terrified people around us. Luke catches a few cars, throwing them back at one of the bad guys—I can't see who because of the dust in the air. After that, though, I stop paying attention to what the others are doing, instead focusing on the task at hand. I run over to the Wrecker, where Peter is already taunting him.

"Hey, Wrecker, couldn't you come up with a more original name? You deserve to go to jail for just that- and your smell, phew!" For extra effect, he pinches his nose shut and waves his hand in front of his face.

The Wrecker gives an enormous grunt, and starts running toward a building, but I- carefully- breath in. He halts in his tracks, looking around dazedly, and Peter doesn't hesitate to bind him up in his webs, insulting him with his 'humor'.

Within a few minutes, we have them all captured. As Peter dusts his hands together and says, "Well that was easy-", a cold laugh echos through the city.

"Stupid heroes," Wizard boasts as the Frightful Four materialize before us.

Trapster pounds his fist, grinning, and cracks his knuckles. "This is a-"

Peter interrupts him. "Yeah, we know, we know, a trap."

His grin widens at Peter's words. Wizard says, "Oh, dear, heroes, you think you have only us to contend with?"

The Sinister Six step forward, backing up the Frightful Four.

"Hmm, let me guess, the Terrifying Ten?" Peter scoffs. "Make that the _Terrible _Ten!" Ava rolls her eyes at his joke, and elbows him. Peter's jaw drops. Dr. Doom laughs mechanically.

"Doom has arrived."

"Oh, so you've got _Doctor Dumb _too?" Peter tries to make light of it, but his words are hollow, and his voice quivers nervously.

Then we fight.

Eleven bad guys to the six of us? They have nearly twice our number.

I quickly lose track of who I'm fighting, what I'm doing. I just do it. Jab, duck, uppercut, flying side kick, fall, jump back up, get ready to fight the next guy. Eventually I manage to decapitate the Rhino.

"How on earth" -Peter pauses, ducking to avoid a blow from Kraven- "did these guys escape?"

"Some things are better left unanswered, and some questions are better left unsaid," Danny shouts back, over the racket of Electro's maniacal screaming.

"Well, I thought you guys said that you never actually captured the Lizard!" I counter.

Peter swings over to Danny, tripping Kraven in the process. "I never told you that!"

"Oops, well, guess I Dreamed it!" The words slip from my mouth before I can stop them, and I angrily punch Electro. A warm buzzing spreads through my body and I feel unbelievably powerful.

"Where did you go?" Peter exclaims.

I think I'm shaking. Really fast. "IDON'TKNOW!"

I have to get rid of this somehow. I touch Peter's arm, and he jumps up, landing on a wall. Probably not the best choice, I realize, as his web-shooters start malfunctioning. At least he manages to direct them towards Trapster, and I manage to calm down.

"Hey! All my webbing's gone! Thanks a lot, Em."

"Sorry," I shrug. "I didn't-"

A cold, icy feeling spreads throughout my back, and, as if in slow motion, I fall forward, onto my face. Bitter laughter echoes overhead. "Weak," Flame hisses in my ear, and a burning sensation spreads over my back as I lay there, helpless, screaming. Pain. Roaring pain. Then blood. Choking blood.

Dark tunnel. An end? Maybe? A light. Crawl. To that light. Peace.

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_Ava's POV_

Today, Emmaline died. Today, Danny cried. I am numb. Once you think somebody's died a few times, you half expect them to jump back up and yell, "JK! I'm alive! Haha, cruel joke, sorry." Then you punch them in the arms, try not to cry, and go back to life.

I turned around in time to see Flame stab her. Then I blinked, and Flame disappeared. I didn't really think it could be happening, but she screamed. I'd never heard somebody scream. Not like that. Doc Ock's videos had been the worst, I'd thought, but this was a hundred times as bad. Like watching Kraven murder _him. _

Danny's head whipped around, and he stumbled to her, kneeling by her, and holding her hand. I think he must have been crying, saying something, but wherever she is, she can't hear us. Not anymore.

Now he's dropping her hand, his head drooping. Luke walks over to him, and checks her wrist for a pulse. Nothing. He shakes his head, and drapes an arm around Danny's shaking shoulders.

Sam takes off his helmet, something I have never seen him do before. His head is bowed, and when I see his face, his eyes are red. Sam quickly turns away so I can't see his tears. I won't cry. No. I have to be strong.

This shouldn't have happened. I mean, what the hell? The girl had nine months to live, and her nut job sister came and robbed her of that time. Anger bubbles up inside, and the claws come out. All of the other times, there wasn't any hope, but Danny was strong. He must have still had this little place inside of him that believed in her.

If he thought she was dead, then she must be. All of the other times, we never physically felt her pulse fade away, her heart cease to beat. I don't want to see her dead. If she's dead, then she's gone. Nothing I can do. I could have stopped it, you know? It's too late, though, she's gone. Dead is gone. I seriously need to learn to accept that.

Whatever people in books and movies say, death isn't graceful. Dying is pitiful, and drawn-out. It's messy, sweaty, horrible. A detestable thing that everybody tries to avoid. It's one thing to see dead prey before you, completely different to have an enemy's blood or a friend's end.

I turn away. There's still this whole mess to clean up. These bad guys to beat. Then I see that they;re not laughing. Dr. Doom is gone. Fuck. I just let him escape! Snarling, I turn to the rest of these guys, and before I can register the deed, they're all beat up in a pile. Stupid. You know, it's stupid. To be this aggravated over the death of the dying. It's only a bit earlier. Nine months, that's nothing!

The rest of the team is standing there, still. "Come on," I bark at them. "Tricarrier's waiting." Their heads jerk up, and Sam slips his helmet back on. Slowly, Luke stands up, but Danny stays where he is. At last, Luke picks up the body and starts carrying it back to HQ, leaving Danny behind.

I snarl, "Get your ass up, Fortune Cookie. Come on, say something all wise and stuff that doesn't mean anything. I don't care, just get your shit together and move!"

He doesn't say anything for a minute, then responds in an even tone, "It hurt."

Danny stands up, and the rest of us follow. I hate him for saying that. What kind of crappy meaning is that? _It hurt? _Then it hits me like the weight of the world. _It hurt to die. _Somehow, it wasn't _supposed _to hurt?!

Yeah, right. Life hurts, why shouldn't death?

His words are rather accusing, I realize. Like it's our fault for not being there. Well, it is. I mean, it was a trap! Kind of obvious, we should have realized something like this would happen.

Fury starts yelling at me once I get back. "What the hell happened back there?! Nobody's saying anything except Danny, and it was just crap about it hurting!"

"Oh," I say, my words bitter and angry. "So Luke didn't show you the body?"

"BODY?!"

"She's dead. Emmaline. You idiot, Fury." I shake my head. "Didn't think about this, I suppose?"

"Get. Power Man. And. Iron Fist. Back. Here. NOW. Ayala." Fury mutters through clenched teeth.

Stupid. Why did I lose my temper? I have to keep my cool! Stupid. Stupid.

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Heavy breathing. Long sigh. Open my eyes. Danny. Luke.

Blood. I cough, and spit out more blood. "Bandage?" I sputter.

Luke drops me, and a moan escapes my lips. "YOU'RE DEAD!"

"Not," I cough.

"What the-? EMMA!" Danny drops down, his breathing fast, and I manage a faint smile, my lips cracking. What happened? Why does my back feel numb? My body aches. Why does Luke think I'm dead? I close my eyes, struggling to ignore the pounding in my head.

"Uh..." I groan. "Help?"

"Crud, Danny, we gotta get her to a doctor!" He picks me back up, and I hate the bumpy feeling. Luke sets me down on a bed. Soft sheets.

More swearing. Yelling. Lots of racket. Everything fades in and out. When I finally manage to catch myself starting to wake up, I struggle to find something to hold onto, to keep my head above the drowning darkness.

I'm laying in the infirmary. I feel like my head was emptied and stuffed with cotton. Blinking, I hear a voice, talking.

"You should not be alive."

"Yeah?" I sputter, my tongue swollen with unsaid things.

Danny's grinning face hovers over mine. "You died."

"Ta da? Not ready, yet. Not leaving. Too soon."

"Headache?"

I want to nod, but my neck feels too stiff. "Happened? Don't remember."

He carefully closes my lids. "Shh. Rest. Sleep."

"Tell me."

"Flame stabbed you. You died. You lived. You're here."

I try to wrap my head around his words, but I cannot, and I drift back into sleep.

_One week later..._

Things finally start to make sense when they let me leave the infirmary. I still cannot remember what happened. I can't remember what it was like to die. I think it must have been peaceful. Really, though, I wonder why I lived.

Some say my mutation. Actually, that is what everybody tells me. How that happened, though, nobody wants to explain. Ava was really mad at me for a day or two. She said that I seriously need to stop almost dying, and make up my mind—in a joking way, of course, but the words still make me think.

It does not make any sense at all, really. Until I think of my mom's curse. Then it starts to make sense: ölüm konuşun. Death Speak. If I felt like it, I could ask Danny. This is one more thing that I really need to stop. If Bryan did this, then I really owe him something. He bought me another nine months or so.

I think it was Bryan. I do _not_ want to talk to him again, though. That's one of the _last_ things I want to do. How many people want to speak with a dead man? But a dead man who saved your life- sort of- well, there's not much choice. Ignoring that would be extraordinarily rude.

I guess that I am extraordinarily rude, then.

**-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-..-.-. .-.-.-.-.-.-.-..-.-.-.-.-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-**

June passes quickly.

In July, Danny mentions Uzun Uyku again.

"No," I told him.

"Okay, Em," Ava said, snapping her book shut with a sense of finality. The entire team was in the lounge room together. The exact reason that Danny brought that up at the time. "What _is _Uzun Uyku?"

I shifted uncertainly. "Basically, it's a magical sleep. You're in a kind of elevated state of, uh..."

"Consciousness," Danny supplied.

"Yeah. Your consciousness is sort of out on the astroplane, you know? Uh, you don't..." I trailed off at their confused faces. "Just think of an alternate reality, except it's actually apart of this reality. And, you're floating around there while your body sleeps. One or more people 'bind' you to earth. If people didn't, erm... _bind_ you, then you'd just, well... float away... you'd be alive, but... yeah. Really bad stuff can happen if the person who binds you doesn't do it right. When you want to wake up, the 'binder' brings you back, and that's usually the hard part. Both people have to be really talented. It usually fails. Really badly. So, yeah. It can last thousands of years, because it usually either kills the Earth-Hold or gives them a really long life. Yeah. Pretty much at least one person dies every time."

"Wow," Peter said at last. "That's... wow. Magic?"

"To the most basic point," Danny supplied. He turned to me. "You still refuse to trust me."

"I trust you! I just don't trust _myself_."

"Wait." Ava paused. "So you- Danny- want Em to do this sleep thing with you as her Earth-Hold?"

"Yes."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Woa. Em, I don't blame you. That's... yeah."

"And that settles it," I said, and walk away.

August. September. October. November. December. February.

One more month.

That's all I have.

Well, technically, I _had _a month. Now it's a week. One week to live. Rather desolute, yes. But it's been the best year of my life. I've had a lot of fun. Just... living.

Yeah. Living.

Joking with Peter.

Cooking with Sam.

Getting to know Luke.

Hanging out with Ava.

And doing Yoga with Danny. (Plus kissing. A lot. My reasoning: I have to fit a lifetime into a year. And being with Danny in _that _sort of way just feels right.)

Yes. The best year of my life.

This week crept up on me. Unexpected. I was so enthralled with life. Danny only just brought it up. We're leaving Sunday, March second. Today is February 24th. A Sunday. He says that I need to decide what I'm going to do. It's true; I have been putting this off. Death arrangements. Yuck.

"Tomorrow, you should likely prepare your will and funeral arangements," he suggests. We are sitting in the easy pose across from each other in the living room. We were doing Yoga before this came up.

I wrinkle my nose. "Funeral? I don't want all that sad stuff. Plus, I'll be in K'un L'un, not here."

"True."

Shrugging, I say, "Just do what they did for that one famous person. You know, release a bunch of balloons into the sky in celebration. That's way happier than a depressing funeral."

"In K'un L'un, you will have the burial of a true queen. My queen."

I manage a wan smile. "Sure. If you want." It is rather odd to be discussing my death yet again. "As for a will, I don't exactly own much. Nothing of much worth. Kind of diaries and stuff that won't matter when I'm gone. I'll just bring them to K'un L'un and you can either burn them or keep them; I don't care. You should really burn them, though," I add hastily. No need for him to see some of that, although a bit of it might be helpful.

"Okay. What would you like to do this week?"

In the end, it's easy. Monday, I'm going to do stuff with Peter.

Tuesday, I'm going to cook with Sam.

Wednesday I'm going to spend with Luke.

Thursday, I'll spend with Ava.

Friday, we'll fly to a tropical place. I'm not well suited to travel at this point, but I'm so close to the end, I know I can hold it together throughout the flight. Plus I haven't ever been anywhere tropical (not in person anyway).

Saturday, I'm going to the park to do Kundalini for a day. Everybody's coming. Even Nick and Coulsen. Then we'll go out to dinner.

Then, Sunday, Danny and I will leave.

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**A/N: No, the next chapter will not be the last chapter. Don't worry. ;-D**

**Sorry if this is a tad choppy. The next one will be better, I promise! This was just my least favorite to write, so... **

**-FFS**

**PS**

**Thanks for the reviews:**

**TheOnyxDragon12: Yes and yes.**

** : He is still blind (sorry about that- see TheOnyxDragon's review, she's correct), and no, they surgically removed it; at least as far as he knows!**

**Nerdy-Tomboy: I made it up.**


	27. Memorable

**DISCLAIMER: Same as last chapter. I don't own the quotes or Ultimate Spider-Man. I do own my OC's and the idea.**

**Chapter 27: Memorable**

"_**In the end,**_

_**we only regret the chances we didn't take,**_

_**the relationships we were afraid to have,**_

_**and the decisions we waited too long to make."**_

_**-Unknown**_

Monday.

Most people detest Mondays. They see them as an end to the weekend, a goodbye to the fun; I always saw them as a new beginning. A fresh, new challenge that I had to face. Mondays would never be my endings; they were always the beginnings, because I always starkly refused to give up on a day which filled so many other people with misery. One's miserable Monday was my Marvelous Monday.

That was my last Monday. The beginning of the end, so to speak. I still didn't want it to be sad, though. I want my last days to be my happiest, because that's what I wish my life was—happy. This past year and a half with my friends has been the best thing that ever happened to me. I want to celebrate those moments, make more joyful memories, reflect on the beautiful things that have happened; not remember the tortured months that we all endured, or wallow in sadness. As many people have said, each ending is simply a new beginning.

Funny the way it passed me by so quickly. The hours in the lab with Peter passed in the blink of the eye. He showed me how to make things explode (and how to burn my fingers), and made me laugh at his silly puns. I never used to pay attention to how funny and smart he is. Not so bad after all, you know?

Tuesday.

Another day that passed way too fast.

Sam talks a lot. He doesn't just talk, though, he actually says things. He went on for hours about the different spices. I loved the way he just acted normal, like this wasn't _'let's talk before I die'_. And that he did yell at me a bit when I blew up the microwave (tinfoil and microwaves... yeah). It made me feel absolutely, horribly, magnificently human.

Wednesday.

Looking back, this was the slowest day. Not to say that it wasn't enjoyable, but it was more solemn.

Luke has never been one for talking. Not one for philosophy, either. He's more "down to earth, get the job done". Which has always seemed ironic to me, because Danny is very spiritual, yet they are best friends.

I spent a lot of time around him, this past year and a half, but that was mostly because I spent a lot of time with Danny. I won't claim to really have known him; I didn't. Danny did, and I admire that he could get Luke to talk at all. Or maybe they never really talked like that, and their relationship was built solely on mutual understanding and acceptance.

In any case, my final Wednesday was no exception. He didn't say much, but when he did talk, his words had a lot of meaning. There is so much about him that he never talks about. I suppose that's apart of his 'tough guy' persona. I managed to talk to him a bit about his parents, which he had only discovered to be alive a few weeks ago. They are S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, and are only just discovering the person that Luke's become.

Most of the day was just spent _doing_. Not thinking, but just enjoying doing things. Danny joined us in the afternoon. None of us are exactly talkative, so I guess that we just accepted each others silence and basked in the simplicity of _doing_.

Thursday.

Ava and I just did girl things, I suppose. Things that neither of us usually did, like shopping and drinking coffee, but things that we did just for the sake of _doing, _the same way that Luke just did stuff. The coffee was gross—that we both agreed on—and there wasn't any point in me buying clothes. (Which, in itself, made me kind of sad, but then we ate a bunch of ice cream, and I felt better again.)

When she carefully brought up the subject of me, well, dying, I told her a bit about everything. We both ended up half laughing, half crying, in the middle of a sandwich shop. Which was okay with us. It felt good to be sad together. We weren't crying in a depressed sort of way, but a "look at everything that we did together" reminiscing sort of way.

Friday.

For fun, Sam flew us to the island where they apparently had encountered the Sandman a few years ago (which had resulted in a lot of trouble). The Sandman had since been moved to a more permanent holding place, but Peter still flat-out refused to venture into the woods.

I hadn't been swimming since I was a little kid, and the salty taste of ocean water was new to me. For some reason, my eyes continually wandered to Danny, who, I must say, looked good without a shirt (a new sight to me). Really good.

We played volleyball too. It was a sort of 'fun' day. Enjoying things together while they lasted, because this wouldn't ever be an option again, and we knew it. Danny was leaving New York forever to be king of K'un L'un, and I was saying goodbye for a different, more permanent forever, numbed by death. Peter, Sam, Ava, and Luke were all remaining behind, to grow and change by themselves. Already, a dull ache had begun in my heart, a pang for all those memories with my friends. Forever is a really long time, and after tomorrow, the next time I would see them would be in death—a time hopefully quite far away.

That evening, Danny and I went on a walk in the woods alone. As we left, I saw Peter and Ava taking another path, their fingers entwined.

Today was Saturday. The Last Day.

It was hilarious.

Watching Nick and Agent Coulson trying to do the positions—everyone was laughing. I don't know how the others felt, but I thought it was peaceful.

Danny insisted on going to a really expensive place for dinner, and paying for it. We talked and laughed, ignoring the goodbye's, because those are too sad. We just enjoyed what we had for the moment. After dessert, though, I gave them their presents.

Each gift was only a quote and a photograph, but those were the best things I could have given them. We cried a bit, and hugged.

Good-bye's hurt. A lot. Especially "forever goodbye's" that truly are permanent, like mine. Because forever is a really, really long time. Death is a really long forever, though, so what could I have expected?

Ava's voice shook as she said, "Thanks. You know. Just... I'm sorry." Her voice broke at the end. She didn't cry, though, because she's Ava. Ava always feels like she needs to be strong for her team.

I saw the lonely little tear sliding down Sam's cheek, as he grinned lopsidedly at me, giving me a one-armed hug.

Luke's face was stony, but his embrace was long and firm.

Peter was hiccuping a bit, and I saw Ava kick him underneath the table, telling him to stop. His goodbye was awkward, but heartfelt.

Nick and Coulson looked emotionless at first glance, but their eyes were deep and feeling.

Of course, at the end, Danny embraced me, then kissed me. I kissed him back, and for a golden minute, we were in our own little world that knew only love. When we broke apart, grinning, Peter started clapping, and everybody joined in.

Gosh, I love these people. Forever good-bye's never get easier, do they?

**F-O-R-E-V-E-R-G-O-O-D-B-Y-E-** **F-O-R-E-V-E-R-G-O-O-D-B-Y-E-F-O-R-E-V-E-R-G-O-O-D- B-Y-E-**

Sunday.

I wake up at five in the morning to Danny gently shaking me. He hands me a beautiful blue robe with gold trim that sparkles lightly in the faint light. I shower and slip it on. When I return from the bathroom, Danny is standing there. He is majestic in his clothing from K'un L'un, a white hooded cloak draped over his shoulders.

"You must look beautiful."

I blush slightly, but don't reply as I pick up my only luggage, a small suitcase filled with journals and poetry for Danny to burn.

It is too early for any of our teammates to be up, and we leave the Tricarrier without any more tearful hugs goodbye. It's funny; I have, at times, felt like I wanted to leave this place forever and never return, but now, as I actually do, it's an entirely different feeling. I have left and returned to this place countless times, for various reasons, but now it is truly The End.

I shiver, not because of the cold wind, but because of my frosty heart. The heart that continues beating, feeling, keeping me alive. How many breaths do I have left?

As if he can hear my thoughts, Danny wraps an arm around my shoulders. We stand there, just the two of us, on 100th Avenue, waiting. A black limousine pulls up in front of us, and we step in.

"The monks are waiting for us in K'un L'un," he says quietly to me. The drive to the airport is long, and I feel alone, despite that I am with Danny. I will be alone in death, because, ultimately, I was born to die. Others are born to live. Not me.

The private jet is warm. _Rand Industries. _I sigh, sitting down in the aisle across from Danny, feeling that it is likely disrespectful to sit by a 'king'. Danny shakes his head at me, patting the seat next to him, and I stand to join him.

So close to the end, I remind myself. My hands buzz and shake, and I wring them anxiously. My fingers are pale and boney, far too thin. I feel so frail after being strong for so long. In many ways, death will be a relief.

"The beginning of the end," Danny says softly, and he pulls me closer. I give in, laying my head on his shoulder, and closing my eyes, letting sleep overwhelm me for the remainder of the journey.

**LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\**

**Nearly at the end. :,( **

**The sequel will be called "Stones Taught Me to Fly" in the Ultimate Spider-Man category, and will be uploaded soon after the final chapter of this. I hope you all decide to read the sequel to this sequel!**

**Thanks for the reviews:**

**TheOnyxDragon12: You are an extraordinarily good guesser.**

**Nerdy-Tomboy: Well, at least she has a week! (Well... five days anyway...)**

**DannyLover99: Ironically, as I read your review, "She Loves You" by the Beatles came on. Sigh, life and love are fleeting. **


	28. The End

**DISCLAIMER: I only own my OC's and the idea. I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man or the quotes.**

**WARNINGS: I am not responsible for any sadness or tears that may result from this chapter. Well, technically I am, being the authoress who decided to torture the characters in such a way, but... don't get mad! Anyways, there's a sequel, so ... if that makes you feel better... (you knew this was coming!).**

**A/N: I would listen to a really sad song as you read this if I were you. If you don't know any sad songs, then I'd try "The Blower's Daughter" or "Nine Crimes" (both by Damien Rice), "Hallelujah" (by anybody that you want to listen to), "Eleanor Rigby" by the Beatles. You get the idea, I'm sure. **

**Chapter 28: The End**

"_**In every shadow there is light**_

_**In every tear, a smile.**_

_**In death, I know there is still life**_

_**That lingers for awhile..."**_

_**-Author Unknown**_

K'un L'un is majestic. Beautiful. It lives up to its name.

The mountains take my breath away, and as I step off of the plane, I feel suddenly faint. The entire city is surrounded by a golden aura of energy that makes me feel weak. Calmly, Danny stands beside me. Three elderly monks bow to Danny.

"Namste, Sensei." Danny bows.

"Namaste, Daniel." The shortest of the three eyes me over his half moon glasses. "Why is the Hayat Ruh with you?"

"My love has come to sleep eternally, to end her struggle with life." Danny's voice is even, but I feel terrified of these people.

"Then let us end this." The other two monks nod in agreement.

Danny leads me to the monastary, which leaves me in complete awe. Everything here is gorgeous, sacred. At the end of a long hallway is a doorway. Danny grasps me by my shoulders, whispering once more in my ears. I nod. I am ready for this.

Tears well up in Danny's eyes, and we embrace each other. I never want to let go. Carefully, his hand unwavering, Danny pushes open the golden door. A large bed dominates the room, and I slowly walk towards it. When I reach it at last, Danny stops me.

This place is sacred. But that does not stop us from kissing. The most passionate, heartfelt kiss goodbye of my life.

He tucks me in, then, his hand shaking, offers me a vial of liquid.

It burns my throat, and I swallow hard, trying to keep myself from throwing up. My stomach churns, and I try to relax. Danny strokes my sweaty forehead, giving me a gentle kiss.

The candles are flickering—no, my vision is fading away. I take one last look at those beautiful, soulful green eyes to see the life within.

"Emmaline, Seni seviyorum. Her zaman, kraliçem. Ben öpücük ile uyanmak kadar şimdi uyku." Danny's peaceful voice calms me, and I feel tired. Sleepy. I am ready.

I part my lips, and manage to croak, "Danny, Seni seviyorum. Her zaman, benim kral. Eğer öpücük bana uyanmak kadar şimdi uyku."

I love him. But now, I sleep.

_Blissful darkness. A faint little lamp. I walk down the tunnel, and embrace the light._

**-END-**

**Thank you so much, everybody, who has reviewed. **

**The sequel should be up really soon. It is in the Ultimate Spider-Man category, called, "Stones Taught Me to Fly".**

**Again, thank you.**

**-FFS**


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